Last to Rise(54)

All that came back slowly to start with. I was in a bed, and it smelled nice so I could be sure I wasn’t in my office, squidged on the sofa that smelled of mouldy stuffed tigers. Not just nice – I could smell proper food cooking, which was beyond nice and into downright heavenly. I turned over, relishing the sudden space, the clean sheets and the promise that smell seemed to give, and discovered an arm draped across me. A feminine one with a delicate hand. Better and better, though it appeared the lady it was attached to was clothed, which was a disappointment.



I was heroically prepared to make the most of it though, until everything else came back with a rush that felt like a mountain in the face and an anvil of weight across my shoulders. Dench – Storad – machines – Halina watching me with eyes like dinner plates in a face pale as winter, all her delicious hatred of the world and everything in it drained away before she snapped back and threw rocks around with an abandon that had scared me. The men I’d seen, whom Pasha had tried to stop me seeing. Half burned, some of them, or with faces ripped and bleeding as they went for each other in a mindless, mechanical way. I sat bolt upright in the bed and leaned over the side to be sick, but nothing came up except pink-tinged bile.



A soft voice, a softer hand on my shoulder that normally I’d have been all over like a rash but I couldn’t muster the energy or enthusiasm right then.



“Lie down, you shouldn’t be up yet.”



I shrugged Erlat off more brusquely than I meant to and tried to stand up. On the third try I managed, and with a shadowy tiger stalking the corner of the room, I found a shirt to put on. “I can’t. Not – I can’t. Where the hell is my allover?”



“Kersan’s still trying to get the blood out.”



“Blood? But —”



“Your blood, Rojan.” Erlat slid out of bed and came to stand in front of me. I’d never seen her like this before. Maybe it was the hair that threw me, a glossy snake of it that draped her shoulders instead of being kept in its tight coil at the nape of her neck, before it slid on down over the silky nightgown that made me come over all funny. Or perhaps that there wasn’t even a hint of either her smooth professional persona or any teasing. I began to wonder how many different women she was. Too many for me to keep track of, especially the way my mind had seemingly turned to mush.



When I didn’t say anything, she carried on in a soft, almost bewildered voice. “Your blood, because when Pasha got you here you were covered in it. Out of your nose, out of your mouth, your ears. Your eyes, Rojan. Everywhere. Pasha said… it took him and Dendal everything they had to keep you here. They told me about this black, that you could fall in any time. That you probably will if you aren’t careful, and there’s only so much they can do.” She took a breath and then the Erlat I knew was back, teasing me, trying to get me to blush with a seductive smile and a taunt, and I thought maybe that was her wall, like mine was cynicism and Jake’s was her swords. This teasing, this pretend seduction, was Erlat’s wall to hide behind, and that made me wonder what it was she was hiding from.



“Two days in my bed and still you won’t take me up on my offer. And you’re going to stay there too. I promised Dendal that I’d keep you here. Sadly, I also promised him I’d make sure you didn’t overdo anything as well. Or you’d be in big trouble, Mr Fancy-pants Mage. By the way, do you realise you’re only wearing a quite short shirt?”



I’d managed not to blush through the first part out of long practice, but then I looked down and noticed that indeed the shirt was very short and I was naked underneath. I blushed enough that it felt like a volcano had sprouted on my nose, sat down before I fell down and grabbed for the sheet.



Once I’d managed to calm my flaming forehead – tricky, in the face of Erlat’s delighted laugh – I managed to get out some questions. As much to change the subject from what was under my shirt than anything.



“So, are you going to tell me what’s been going on? Did Lise get the engine? It was the engine I got out, wasn’t it? Is Pasha OK? What are the Storad up to? Did Halina get back all right? I kind of lost track…”



Erlat turned away, but not before I saw a look of sudden fear that dropped a millstone into my stomach. She fiddled with two cups on the table, poured some fragrant tea, and when she turned back she was smooth again, no hint of anything but professional charm as she handed me a cup. Goddess only knew where she’d got it from – the only tasty thing Under, it’d been one of the first things to run out – but then Erlat had some very high-up and wealthy clients. I took a long slug and savoured it. The bacon smell was still there, driving my stomach into giddy knots of anticipation. I began to wonder if Erlat had some and was hiding it, or alternatively whether I was still imagining it.