"So how did you figure it out?"
"Her maid found the fucking contraband hidden in her closet, she'd gone around the house to all our hiding places and confiscated everything, she took all the keys and SIM cards and called the phone company, and had our calls forwarded to some throw away phone she bought."
"Why didn't you just use her phone to call out for help?"
"Said hers wasn't working either, I swear we thought we were under attack from some high tech faction." Alphonso was laughing his ass off.
"Two whole fucking days, my place isn't exactly within walking distance of my offices and shit and we didn't know where the fuck the threat was coming from so we hunkered down and went into protection mode, the little terror even played up the fear card all along too. Made me feel like shit because she couldn't go to some friend's party or some shit, while the whole time she had set the whole thing up."
"What did you do when the maid found the stuff?"
"We sat her down and tried to reason with her, what else can you do with a ten year old that can pull some shit like that off?” Rossi answered Tony.
"That's when Roberto and I first really realized what we had on our hands."
"Yep, and she's kept us on our toes ever since then, so boy I'm telling you, you're gonna pay for that stunt, watch your ass, I would at some point like to rock my grandchildren on my knees if you know what I'm saying."
I couldn't believe the leader of the mob world was sitting in my car gossiping about his daughter like a doting old woman after hitting a man that was out to kill him. I live in a fucked up world?
I listened to the four of them going on and on about what she might do to me, Tony and Mikey seemed to be having way too much fun thinking up ways that she could torture me, I wouldn't put it pass these two to help her out in any way with whatever she came up with, traitorous bastards.
"Mikey, how bout I tell Sophie how you were ogling Monica's ass."
"What...are you crazy, when did I do that, you trying to get my ass killed?"
I smirked at him before turning to the other one.
"If you and Lucy Ricardo over here put any ideas in Mouth's head I'm gonna be sharing a lot of shit with my sisters."
"My Anna would never believe that shit." Tony was all puffed up.
"She'd believe me if I tell her that you missed her birthday party so you could go watch the fight in Vegas."
"Bro you had that meet set up long before we realized that she was gonna throw the party on that particular Saturday, we couldn't pull out, that's what you said."
I polished my nails on my shirt as I grinned at him.
"That's cold bro, even for you, okay we won't put any ideas in her head, besides I don't think she needs our help." He was back to grinning like an ass, maybe I'll set them up anyway just for the fuck of it all, that'll keep them the fuck out of my business.
We pulled into the underground garage and I felt my heart rate pick up, what the fuck was I gonna find up there, knowing Mouth it would be snarky and insulting but beyond that I didn't think she would do anything harmful, like shoot me in the ass, besides she'd told me she loved my ass one of the times I'd been buried inside her.
That's right, I remembered my earlier counsel, no one had ever been inside her, and I had, so therefore she wouldn't treat me to the same horrors as everyone else.
The ride up was tense, the four henchmen were back to giving me looks, what the fuck ever. I think some of my confidence slipped when I turned the key in the door though.
Chapter 9
What the fuck?
"Mouth...how the fuck.....ma?"
What the fuck was going on around here? I walked through the door gearing up my nuts for the shit storm that was about to come, only to find that I'd been thwarted again.
"Seriously, are you fucking kidding me?"
"Shane Patrick Flanagan you watch your mouth."
My mother scolded me as she put what looked like a bowl of mashed potatoes on the table, my focus was on Mouth who had yet to say a word or even acknowledge my presence.
My two sisters came from the kitchen with more food in their hands while I looked around like I was in the twilight zone.
"How did you get out?"
"She called me."
"She called you, how did she do that?"
"Well actually she texted me and told me what you had done, shame on you, I thought I raised my son to treat a lady better than that."
"Ma...."
"Don't you ma me, you're lucky I don't let her dismember you as she's been threatening to do for the last three hours."
What the fuck, when the fuck had I lost control of my life and everything in it?
Yeah I could answer that one real easy, it happened the day I let a little spitfire into my office.