LOVE ‘EM(50)

Shay stands inside. “What was all that?”

“Even though I told Jack that Dave and I are still an item, he wants to hang out.”

She grins and shakes her head. “Well, wonder of wonders. Perhaps he’s not a total ass after all.”

Dickey Bird crackles and caws. “Ass. Kiss my feathered ass.”

Shay and I look at each other. He hangs upside down in his cage, his head turning this way and that as he nibbles at his wooden toys. We burst out laughing.

The two-ton brick that’s been sitting on my shoulders seems so much lighter all of the sudden. “When did you teach him that?”

She shrugs. “I didn’t.”




The cursor blinks at the top left corner of the virtual page. It stares at me as though it expects greatness to flow into it via Times New Roman fonts all typed into neat rows.

This is the worst part of starting any document. New books especially.

Instead, I mess around, checking my social media accounts. I look at my bank statement. Anything is a good distraction to put off working on a relationship self-help book, when I obviously know nothing about relationships.

I’m a complete and total fraud. One day, not long from now, some reader is going to show up to a book signing. Instead of trying to attack me, they’ll stand with their finger pointed, yelling, “Fraud!”

I can’t believe Decode the Man in Your Life isn’t an abject failure. I can’t even capture the man I love. Hell, I can barely keep his attention for as long as it takes me to suck him off and let him do the same for me. That’s why I keep putting off calling him to get together—as friends.

I can’t do friends with Jackson. And even though I wish that somehow he’d change if he knew about the baby, a million women would probably tell me differently. He and I don’t have the same long-term goals. He’s not going to suddenly want to be a father simply because we’re friends.

I grab my phone. Gee-Gee will know what I should do.

On the fourth ring, she picks up. “Hello?”

“Hey, Gee-Gee.” I let out a slow sigh.

“Uh oh. I know that sound. What’s going on, Baby?”

All of the sudden, my throat clogs with tears that want to strangle me. My breaths hitch and I can’t talk. All I get out is a high pitched whine.

On the other end, Gee-Gee tut-tuts. “Now, Sweetie, calm down. I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong. Did you have an accident?”

I pull in a shaky breath and wipe the wetness from my eyes. “Yes. But, not like you th-thi-think.”

Her tone changes to something more like the steel-backboned woman I admire so often. “Now, Ronnie. You need to tell Gee-Gee what’s going on.”

I’m five years old again and I’ve broken the chain off my bike and scraped my knee, and the only one in the world who can fix me is Gee-Gee, because she’s the only one who was always there. Mom worked all the time and she would run Dad off anytime he tried to visit.

Word vomit spews from my mouth. “I’m in love. He’s famous. He’s a playboy. He’s never going to want me for more than—than—”

I push out what I’m really getting at. “I—I’m pregnant. But he won’t want the baby.”

The silence on the other end might as well be thunder booming. I cringe. I wait. Nothing.

“Gee-Gee?”

A deep breath comes through the line.

“Well, sweet girl, it sounds like you backed into that relationship.”

I bite my lip and sniffle as her words sink in.

“I really did, didn’t I?”

“Now, you need to start at the beginning and see if you can’t turn it around. And if not, then he’s not the man you and your baby need, that’s when you wait. God will send the one you need.”

The tears spring up again. I press my fingers over my mouth, but the wail comes out anyway.

I sniff the snot threatening to run down my face and grind out my words between clenched teeth. “But I don’t want another man, Gee-Gee. I want Jackson.”

More soothing sounds come through, but I’m not comforted. As much as she tries, I’ll never be happy. I’ve got a baby with no daddy, and as soon as he finds out I’m going to get pregnant-fat and all unsexy, he’ll drop me like a pair of dirty drawers.

I’m such a colossal moron. How could I have done this to myself? I knew what he was from the moment we met.

Gee-Gee clears her throat. “You still there, Baby Girl?”

My voice is small. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Sweet child, there has to be something good in him if you started any kind of relationship with him. Uncover it and show it to him.”