"What do you mean?" Something cold was trickling down her spine now, and though she couldn't name the feeling exactly, it felt an awful lot like dread.
"He didn't tell you about all this? To be honest, I didn't think he was capable of talking about anything else. He’s going to open a bike shop in the city."
Rex stared at her for a moment, apparently catching sight of something in her expression. Then, slowly, he put down his bagel and gave her another lazy shrug.
“He might not want to anymore. Priorities change, you know? The baby is going to be the focus for him now and then, when the time is right, I’m sure he’ll get to the bike shop. I mean, I'm sure it's the same for you, right? And even if things aren't how everyone thought they'd be..." Rex chuckled. “I was running off at the mouth to make conversation, is all. Fact is, we’re all happy to have you around and we're all so sure you're going to be a great mother. I mean, you should hear my mom talk about you and the baby. You've never seen anyone so excited.”
"That's very sweet,” she said dully, swallowing the lump in her suddenly too-tight throat. “She's going to be a great grandma."
“Exactly. Luke’s going to be a great dad, and you're going to be a wonderful mother." Rex offered her another nod.
"Thank you.” The words were brittle and tears pricked at the back of her eyes, but she pushed them away. No point in making Rex feel bad.
Facts were facts.
Luke was giving up everything for her and the baby. He'd had dreams and goals and plans--just like she'd had--but he was throwing everything away for her.
And what choice did she give him, really? She'd done the deciding--she'd been the one who'd kept the pregnancy from him and by the time he found out...
He’d had no option but to settle. He was a great guy with a loving family and a good moral compass. He’d done the only thing he could do, and had made the best of it.
Damn it, why hadn’t she seen it sooner?
The door opened again and Luke stomped in, offering a wide grin from her to Rex and back again. "I'm missing the breakfast club?"
"You're just in time. There’s still an everything bagel and a sesame." Rex offered his brother a plate, but the more Tawny looked at him, the more she knew she couldn't stand to be here another second longer.
"I've got to go, actually." She forced a smile and shoved her chair away from the table, fighting tears with every motion. "You guys have a good morning, okay? I'll call. Rex, thank you so much for breakfast.”
“No problem,” he said with a wave. “I didn’t mean to interrupt though, I can bounce of you guys—”
“I have a lunch date with Suzette anyway,” she said brightly, hoping that she could hold the tears in long enough to make a graceful exit without letting on. “Enjoy your bagels and I’ll talk to you later, Luke.”
She passed him as she headed for the door and he swooped down to press his lips to her ear.
“Rain check?” he murmured, his warm breath caressing her ear.
She offered him a shaky smile and gave his hand a squeeze, then scurried toward the door. She didn’t need to check. It was definitely raining. In fact, the skies had never looked so dark.
By the time she'd climbed down the stairs and started to make the short trek toward Suzette’s house, she was in a daze.
Why had Luke never mentioned his dream to her? Why hadn't he thought he could go on with it with her by his side?
Because he couldn't.
Not realistically. She was an anchor around his neck, pulling him down and forcing him into the same life he'd never wanted to have.
Another surge of tears threatened to overwhelm her, but she sped up her pace to Suzette's house. When she got there, she'd be able to let it all out, but until then she had to keep it together and figure out her life.
Which was to say she had to figure out a way to end it.
Sure, Luke could still see the baby and have a relationship with him. But if he didn't have to worry about supporting her, too, he'd have enough money to still do everything he wanted to do and see the baby.
And he would move on. A strong, sexy guy like that? He'd find someone who would add to his life rather than take away from it. It would be hard, incredibly hard to watch him move on, but it would be for the best.
He could still have everything he ever wanted.
And she'd make do. She'd have a small town that felt like home, and a little family of two. That was all she'd ever really wanted, to begin with. A place to hang her hat and to call home.
So why did that dream feel so hollow now?
She walked up to the front of Suzette's house, not bothering to knock before heading straight to Suzette's room and opening the door.