Hearts on Fire 4: Kisses Sweeter Than Pie(15)
He told her several times that he would never let her go, that she belonged to him, and that he would help her to succeed in her business dreams. She’d bought it all. She’d allowed him to control her, take her mind, soul, and of course her body.
She opened her eyes and looked around the room. She recalled Rico telling her over and over again that he in fact owned her forever by taking her virginity and that no man would ever mean as much to her. He spoke about it often, and would whisper in her ear when they were out in public or at his club.
“You see those women over there? They’re nothing but used goods. You, you belong to me now, baby. You gave me the most precious gift that you can only give one time, and it was given to me.” She remembered him caressing his palm under her dress below the table and cupping her mound. She felt the tears roll down her cheeks right now remembering his control, his possessive behavior. It made her feel weak, dependent on him and whatever he commanded. So many times that night when she left, took off scared out of her mind, she debated about returning to him. She thought she needed him to survive and to live.
“You can’t ever leave me, baby. There’s no reason to. No man will ever touch you as deeply or own you as deeply as I do. There’s no use in leaving ever. You understand me, Nina?” he’d asked, pressing a finger under the elastic of her thong panties and stroking her cunt. “Yes.” She’d submitted back then. The fear of his words and how capable he was had intimidated her. But now as she recalled that moment she instantly felt like shit, knowing how trapped she was back then.
“No other man will ever want you. The more I make love to you, the more I fuck you, the deeper my mark remains inside of you.”
“Oh God, will I ever get him out of my head, out of my body?” She covered her head with the pillow and cried.
* * * *
A week had passed and Johnny wondered why Nina hadn’t tried fixing the bike. He knew that Serefina stopped by twice to pick up pies for Sullivan’s, but it seemed that Nina wasn’t showing her face. It bothered him. But Serefina left over an hour ago and he was just about finished cleaning up the bike she wanted to buy from him. He didn’t want to take money for it. He would love if she used it. Their mom had left it here years ago.
Just then he heard a door close, and when he looked up, he saw Nina slowly making her way down the stairs.
“Hi, Nina!” he called out and waved. She waved back and slowly headed toward him. When he looked at her, she looked kind of pale and like she lost some weight.
“Nina, are you feeling okay?” he asked.
“You’ve been working on the bike?” she asked, purposely ignoring his question.
“Yeah, I started it when you didn’t come down looking to work on it yourself. Been busy making some pies?”
“Yes. It looks great. What else does it need? I can buy whatever parts are necessary.”
“Nina, I said I wanted to give it to you. It was just sitting here anyway.”
“Buddy said that you were going to fix them up and sell them.”
“Originally I thought about it, but life got in the way. I’m serious now. You can have it.”
“That’s great. I need to go to the store for some things.”
“Do you need a ride?”
“No, that’s what the bike is for,” she said. When she bent over to see if she needed to raise the seat, she sort of lost her balance. It was like she got dizzy.
Johnny grabbed onto her. “Whoa, are you okay?”
She placed her hand against her head. “Sorry. I think I’m just a little light headed. Like I said, I need to hit the store.”
“Have you been eating?” he asked, immediately concerned.
“I’m fine.”
“I haven’t seen you bring any groceries up except for the stuff for the pies.”
“I eat. Don’t you worry.” She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth.
He reached up and cupped her cheek. “You look pale, and seem weak. Are you eating enough? Three meals a day and lots of water to hydrate?”
“I don’t eat three meals a day and I have plenty of water upstairs. There’s a thing called a faucet,” she replied.
“When was the last time you ate?”
“Last night, dinnertime.”
“What did you have?” She tried pulling away as she exhaled in annoyance. “What did you eat?”
“A granola bar.”
“For dinner?”
She raised her eyebrows as if saying, “Yeah, so what.”
“That’s not enough, Nina. Not with working and baking. You need to eat. How the hell are you going to ride this bike five miles to the grocery store? That’s insane. Then back here with both baskets loaded up? I’ll drive you and help you.”
“No, Johnny.” She pulled away only for her to lose her balance and almost fall backward. Johnny wrapped his arm around her waist and hoisted her up against his chest. She could have hit the truck. Instead her back pressed against it. He was staring down into her eyes and saw the fear, the weakness in her eyes. They weren’t bright. They were sad.
“Nina?” he questioned. When she licked her lower lip and held his gaze, he couldn’t resist. He leaned forward and kissed her.
* * * *
Nina didn’t know what came over her, but being in Johnny’s arms and feeling his masculinity and strength as he kissed her made her forget everything. It lifted her spirits and made her forget why she was depressed and sad. Her weakness from not eating must have weakened her resolve to resist her attraction to him. She wasn’t pushing him away or even panicking.
He explored her mouth and ran his hands over her ass, her back, then pressed her harder against the truck. He smelled so good. His cologne was enticing, consuming as it filtered through her nostrils and throughout her body. She pressed her hands against his rock-solid chest and was in awe at his perfect physique. He was gorgeous and sexy, and towered over her, surrounded her with his manliness and capabilities.
But then came the crazy thoughts. The bad memories of the nightmares she experienced night after night. Rico’s words, his threats telling her that she would never be accepted by another man again. He owned her, marked her, possessed her, and no one else would ever compare. She applied more pressure to Johnny’s chest, indicating for him to stop. Slowly he did, trailing kisses along her jaw and then her neck.
“Damn, Nina, that was incredible.” He held her gaze and kept his body pressed against hers. She was locked in place and in shock at what just happened. For the moments when he kissed her, all the fear, all the pain, all the bad memories didn’t exist. She was happy.
“Why did you kiss me?” she asked him as she kept her hands against his chest. The solidity and warmth of his pectoral muscles burned through his dark T-shirt and straight against her palms. She was aroused, sexually, emotionally, and she needed to end this before she lost control.
He went to speak and she shook her head. “Forget it. Don’t say anything. That can’t happen again, Johnny. I’m sorry.” She tried pushing away, and he cupped her face between his hands and held her gaze.
“Don’t. Please don’t push me away after we kissed like that. Nina, you felt it, too. The depth of that kiss, the connection we shared.”
“No, Johnny, it’s not real. Nothing can happen between us. I’m sorry, but I can’t allow it.”
“Can’t allow it?” he asked, easing his hands from her cheeks and caressing his hands up and down her arms. She wished he would stop touching her so she could concentrate and lie to him. But the feel of his large firm hands gently caressing her skin was too much to ignore. She closed her eyes.
“Oh please, Johnny, I can’t give you anything. I have nothing left to give anyone. It’s all gone,” she said, lowering her forehead to his chest. He caressed her hair and head, kept a hand at her waist, and then hugged her, holding her against him.
“I don’t believe that you have nothing left to give. You let yourself go in that kiss and I felt the emotion, the desire. I don’t know who hurt you or how he did it, but I’ll be damned if my brothers and I are going to let you out of our lives.” She looked up at him. “Your brothers?” she asked, shocked by his words.
“Damn straight,” he said firmly. She felt her cheeks blush. She knew of ménage relationships. There were loads of them around town. Even Serefina was involved with one. Her men were supposedly cousins with Johnny and his brothers. But she’d never thought about such a relationship. She couldn’t even handle one guy’s possessive, demanding conditions. How could she handle three?
She shook her head. He cupped her cheeks between his hands again. “Don’t overthink this. Don’t jump to conclusions. Just feel, Nina. Follow your heart, your gut, your body,” he said, looking over her breasts that somehow seemed to have grown in size from his arousing kiss. She felt so much in his kiss. He was right.
She was confused, and now that she was coming back down from the high she was on, she felt sort of light headed. He kissed her softly on the lips. “Come inside and I’ll make you something to eat before you pass out. We’ll talk about this some more later.”