We have a small Korean shop here in St. Louis, and I ordered this one with your name. Did you know Duk-kee means “virtue” and “profit”? A perfect Korean name for a young man I have come to admire.
Use your dojang proudly, Joseph. And know that being Korean isn’t something you have to prove. You are as real Korean as you can be.
Fondly,
Jae
I held the dojang by its smooth wooden handle, and my fingers touched the ridges in the rubber mat.
This is my name. What my birth mother called me. I thought back to that wave of joy that hit when I first learned about Jae’s aunt. I really believed I’d found my birth mother.
I sighed. Then I said my Korean name out loud.
“Duk-kee.”
And for the first time, it sounded just the way Yongsu said it!
I carried the dojang upstairs to my room. My suit was already laid out on my bed. Dad had polished my black leather shoes and pre-knotted my tie. And Mom had picked up a wrist corsage for Robyn, which was sitting on my dresser.
Just before I took a shower, I reached behind my bed and picked up the corno box.
I unclasped the chain and put it around my neck. Just like Dad and Nonno Calderaro and Uncle Biaggio, I was as real Italian as I could be too.
I’d wear the corno to the dance. And I’d use the dojang whenever I needed to sign my name in a fancy way. Maybe I’d bring it to the Jiffy Wash to show Mrs. Han, especially now that I could say my name like a real Korean.
Why not do both? There are worse things than being an ethnic sandwich.
Special Thanks
It takes a village to raise a children’s book, too. Family, friends, fellow writers, children, teachers, librarians, and adoption advocates have left their imprint on my story. I am grateful to you all.
My parents, Theresa and Harry Kent, whose love and commitment teach me everything I need to know about creating the story of a good life
My four superkids: TJ, wise teen editor and comic book connoisseur; Kellyrose, my sounding board who made sure I “wrote it real”; Connor, the original Buddha Baby; and Theresa, the cutest cheerleader I could have on my team
Patricia Reilly Giff, mentor and friend whose “You will publish” words echoed through the dark
Jae Kim, my Yale angel who enlightened me on Korea’s proud history
Young-jung Yoon, who filled in the cultural blanks and patiently educated me on Korean ways
Rachel Orr, savvy editor extraordinaire, for following “the signs” and believing in a boy named Joseph
Writers on Wednesday Nancy Castaldo, Liza Frenette, Lois Miner Huey, Coleen Paratore, and Kyra Teis. You are the best writers group on this side of the Hudson River. And another book with our word in it, WOW!
Tom Henery, who answered every band question I could e-throw at him. Go Navy!
Jennifer Groff, literary goddess, whose passion for children’s books inspires me
Sal Primeggia, for Italian historical perspective; Sandy Dagliolo, for Italian translation; Abby Curro, for her calamari recipe; Jeanie Orr, for insight on the dojang; Ben Falge at the Japanese Connection, for the beautiful dojang artwork; Jean and Tom Spiegelhalter, for “showing me” St. Louis; Virginia Horn and Barbara Restivo, for constant encouragement; and Laura Garrity, for the New Jersey geography lesson
Finally, to the many caring birth mothers, adoptees, and adoptive parents who graciously shared their stories, sometimes with teary eyes. I am blessed to have heard it all
And to Tom, who opened the windows and let the fresh air in.