“Come on.” I tug her toward the door of her building and lead her upstairs, not giving her any chance to argue or back away.
I know exactly what I want, and she might be confused right now, but I plan on spending the rest of the night proving to her exactly what I mean when I say I’ll never leave her.
Twenty-Two
Kennedy
“Did you hear me?”
I heard him. I’m just trying to figure out what sort of alternate universe I have entered in the last two hours.
Glancing around the pristinely cleaned kitchen, my eyes narrow. Grayson insisted on one thing when we came upstairs: I cook, he cleans. He did an incredible job. The surprise still hasn’t left me.
Perhaps I’ve entered a carb coma from the linguini I made. Each of these options makes more sense than the reality just presented to me.
“I want us to be together.”
I jerk back again and push away from the kitchen table where we’ve spent the last two hours eating and getting caught up. It’s been like a first date with a stranger, complete with awkward silences and everything. He’s told me about his training over the last few weeks and what the rest of schedule looks like until his next fight in New Orleans.
I told him about my interview yesterday, and that when Sarah told me to move to Chicago to live with her after I was let go, I really had no reason to stay there anymore.
We’ve known each other over a decade and I feel like we’re finally just now getting to know one another again.
And now he wants this?
I still haven’t fully acknowledged the way he looked earlier when he said he wanted me in bed—like he was already imagining me beneath him.
This is crazy. He’s crazy.
It’s the only thing I’ve ever wanted…Grayson and me together.
Now he’s offering it to me, and besides my fear of it not working out, there’s truly no reason for me to say no.
His hand cups my cheek, jerking me back to the present, and I blink, focusing on him. His eyebrows are pulled together and his fingers brush along the skin by my ear.
The one brief, simple touch pulls a myriad of sensations throughout my body.
I swallow, feeling every movement of my throat. My voice sounds raspy to my own ears when I admit, “I’m too scared it won’t work out.”
“I’m too scared of not trying. Of walking away from you again.”
Hell. There’s one thing he could say to me that could tear down every defense I have inside me, as meek and pliable as they are when it comes to him, and he’s just nailed it.
“Do you mean it?” I need to see his certainty.
“I have thought of you every moment since I saw you in the stands weeks ago. Even when I was angry with you, I dreamed of you. And after I realized that this isn’t your fault but just a really shitty situation where I gave you very few options, I dreamed of you more. You’re the only person in my life who ever believed in me until Rodney and the twin assholes walked into my life, Kennedy. I have you back, and I don’t want to know what it’d be like to be without you again.”
“What about Thad?”
His hand on my cheek flinches. I see anger flash in his eyes.
I knew it. He might want me, but I doubt he’ll ever be able to forgive me.
I don’t know what he sees in my eyes, except for maybe my doubt and regret, but he presses his lips to mine, erasing it all instantly.
I flinch with surprise at the feel of his kiss, but quickly fall into it. It’s Grayson—I have no other choice. When he kisses me, he becomes my world, my reminder of what I always wanted. His hand slides from my cheek until his fingers are tangled in my hair and he holds me to him, pressing me against him until I can feel us connected along the lengths of our bodies.
A small whimper escapes my throat. It’s matched by one of his own as he opens his mouth and slides his tongue against my lips before delving inside. My hands fly to his biceps and I cling to him, digging my nails into his shirt.
His muscles tighten under my hold, and I press my body more fully against him. I can feel his erection hard and thick against my stomach and I roll my hips, instinctively seeking more of him.
“Kennedy,” he groans, pulling away from me. We’re nose to nose, only centimeters separating our lips, but it’s too much. “I’ve already forgiven you. I just want to know that you’ve forgiven me, too. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. I’m sorry I wasn’t the man you needed me to be when you’d always believed in me.”
A sob falls from my throat and I begin shaking my head back and forth, disbelieving, when he shushes me.
“If I hadn’t left, if I hadn’t walked away, we could have figured out what to do together. Instead, I let my pride and my own fears keep me from you…this is as much my fault as it is yours.”
I open my mouth to object, when realization slams into me.
For the first time, I truly believe what he’s been saying, and what Sarah has said repeatedly for the last few weeks since I’ve told her the full story.
We’ve both made our share of mistakes.
“Okay,” I say, exhaling the word on a sigh, and before I can say anything else, he cuts me off with another quick but firm kiss before he pulls back and smiles at me.
With one corner of his lips higher than the other, it’s a cocky smirk I’ve seen too often on television when he has one arm raised in victory.
“We’ll figure out what to do about Thad and how I can see him as we go along, but I want you in my life, and I want you in my bed. I want you in my corner on fight nights. Please.”
It’s the “please” that has me wanting to surrender immediately, but I can’t yet. As much as I’ve longed to hear these words, there’s still a fear that holds me back.
Both times we’ve spent the night together, the next day has ended with me feeling like my heart is being ripped straight from my chest. I grab onto my remaining resolve, which isn’t much. “Can I think about it? Let you know later?”
His cocky smirk widens into a full grin, and then he lets go of me, hunches down, and his hands go to my hips.
With a squeal, I’m being lifted into the air and over his shoulder. The ends of my hair whip me in the face as I shriek, “What are you doing?”
“Taking you to bed. Giving you something else to think about. Proving to you that I mean every word I’m saying.”
I land on my bed with a bounce and a smile stretching my lips wide.
“What are you thinking?” I ask, breathless already. It’s simply the sight of Grayson as he looms over the edge of the bed.
He leans down, pressing his palms into the mattress next to my shoulders. “I’m thinking we have a lot of time to start making up for.”
Sadness flashes in his eyes with a pinch of guilt. I see it just as he blinks and it vanishes. Reaching up, I slide my hand along his cheek, feeling the prickle of stubble on his jaw as I push my hand further back into his hair, tugging on the loose ends.
With a sly grin, I push my head off the mattress until our lips are almost touching. “Then we’d better get busy.”
His lips twitch, and his eyes heat with desire as he scans my body. “As much as I’m loving this sexy side of you,” he says as he pushes himself off the mattress. His hands graze my ribs, sliding over my hip bones. “I need to get you out of this dress.”
He makes quick work of the wrap dress, deftly untying the fabric belt that holds it together. He unwraps me like I’m his most anticipated present. My heart begins to beat against my chest as I wait for him to look at me again.
When he does, I bite my lip to keep from gasping when I see the heat flaring in his light blue eyes.
“Do you know how sexy you are?” he murmurs, his gaze not moving from my eyes.
“I do when you look at me like this.”
One eyebrow slowly arches. “How am I looking at you?”
Like you love me.
“Like you want me.”
His throat constricts as he swallows. I watch the slow, gentle bobbing of his Adam’s apple and I want to say more…do more…but then his hands begin moving against my flesh again and I can’t do anything but squirm.
I’m divested of my dress and my bra in silence while our desire for each other thickens the air in my room.
“Grayson,” I whisper, my hands once again sliding into his hair when his lips press against my exposed abdomen. His fingers curl into the waistband of my white lace panties and his eyes meet mine again.
The lace tickles and burns every nerve ending in my legs. Sparks flare all over, sending a pulsing sensation to the apex of my thighs as he slowly slides his body down until he’s on his knees on the floor, my legs draped over the edge of the bed.
With one more heated glance in my direction, Grayson leans forward and presses his lips to my heated arousal.
“Hell,” I moan, pushing my head back into the mattress. My hands fall from his hair and curl into the sheets while he slides his tongue along the crevice of my folds, tasting and teasing me with long, slow slides of his tongue.
My hips arch into him, needing more connection, and my pulse races in my ears. My body is ready for him even while my heart is still worried that this won’t end well.
“You taste incredible,” he murmurs, pulling back slightly. I can see every emotion swirling in his eyes and it erases all my fears in the time it takes me to sit up and curve my hands over his shoulders.