Jake (Immortals of New Orleans #8)(8)

Jake had texted Jax earlier in the day, regarding Quintus' appearance at his home, and he'd been informed the vampire was expected at the masquerade ball. Logan mentioned it in his briefing, assuring him Léopold had given his word he would cause no problems. Jake suspected his mysterious attendance was related to the woman, and planned on finding out where the hell he'd taken her.

"Hey man." Jake heard Logan call his name and turned to him, aware guests would be arriving soon.

"Hey," he replied, his closed smile not reaching his eyes.

"I want to have a talk before we get things goin'. My office." Logan pointed down the hallway and set off toward it, not waiting on an answer.

Jake followed, respecting his Alpha. As he rounded into the room, Jake closed the door behind them, taking care to note that Dimitri, the beta, remained behind in the ballroom. This wasn't going to be a quick discussion.

"Anything you want to tell me 'bout last night?" Logan moved to stand in front of a square beveled metal wall mirror. He avoided eye contact, adjusting his tie.

"Why ya asking?" A corner of his mouth tugged upward. As serious as the situation had been last night, he found it both annoying and amusing at the same time that the Alpha could smell deception a mile away. 

"Dimitri's not here." Logan's eyes briefly caught Jake's in the reflection and then focused back onto straightening the bow.

"I noticed. Just you and me, big guy." Jake inwardly cringed at his flippant remark, but the words had left his lips before he could stop them.

"Sometimes … " Logan paused and reached for a red leather mask. He continued speaking while fastening it onto his face. "We change. I wasn't always Alpha. You know this."

"Yeah, yeah I do." Logan had been Tristan Livingston's beta for decades. When Marcel died in his arms, Logan had accepted his position of Alpha. Nearly a year had passed but it seemed much longer.

"You grow as Alpha. Accepting your place is not always easy. It's not always wanted by all the pack members. You may not want it. But it's not about necessarily wanting something. It's about destiny. You see, she gets what she wants. Marcel … he'd been like a brother to me."

"He was a great man."

"I loved Tristan. I loved Lyceum Wolves. They were my pack. Philadelphia was my home. But the night he died, the night I snapped Calvin's neck, everything changed for me."

"This had once been your home. Acadian Wolves. You'd grown up in New Orleans."

"True. But this wasn't my pack. It hadn't been for a long time. I'd been away for many, many years. I didn't want to leave Philadelphia or Tristan."

"Logan, I was going to say something … " Jake stumbled on his words, struggling to find the right way to tell his Alpha. He was only just coming to terms himself with the change inside him. To admit it out loud to another wolf made it far too real. There'd be no taking it back. "I just … what's happening with me. It's not like with you. You were made out of circumstance. What's going on with me, it's like this nagging urge. I didn't want to say anything. I love it here. I love you, the pack. But then when I was with Jax … he knows things. He confronted me about it. Ever since then … I've been trying to figure out what the hell to do. Last night when we were running, my wolf drove me … I can't control it."

"You can say it. Tell me what's going on. This is why I'm here. I'll help you. Support you."

Shame washed over Jake. Logan had always been so fucking on point when it came to his pack, knowing what was going on with his wolves. He'd taken over Acadian Wolves with little resistance from others, effortlessly leading the pack.

"Look, man. I'm sorry. I wanted to say something. It's just I'm not used to this. On our run last night. Fuck, Logan. I don't know how else to put this. The urge to challenge you … I'm losing my fucking shit here. And you know how it is." Jake plowed his fingers through his hair, and shook his head. "My wolf. He's a beast. We're out there running. And then next thing I know, I'm pushing forward into places I shouldn't be. And so what do I do? You know I'm not going to fucking fight you. I break away. I had to get outta there."

"I get it. But you need to talk to me."

"Did Jax say something to you?" His eyes met his Alpha's.

"He didn't have to. But the Alpha thing? Of course Jax is going to know. He's been at this for a long time. He knows wolves, breathes life into his pack. I'm not as experienced as he is, but I can tell you this. When wolves are thinking about challenging me, I know it. It's just like the hum of our pack. I know how they're feeling. With you? You've always been strong, easy-going. But after you returned from New York, things changed."