“Do you miss it?”
“The classical stuff?” I shake my head. “Naw, I don’t play that stuff. But I do write a lot of music these days. Stuff I wish I could play, that I’d be excited about performing. But it’s not what KMG is interested in, that’s for sure. Kirby won’t even give them my stuff.”
“Really?” Tess tilts her head. “That’s insane. Show it to them yourself.”
“No, I don’t want any drama.”
Tess nods, handing me my toast and keeping whatever she is thinking to herself.
“What?” I ask.
“So are you gonna sign this offer they gave you?”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“You tell me, Jack.”
“The truth is, I don’t know what I’m gonna do. Ashley said I’d be insane to walk away from it, and I know I’d feel bad for Kirby. He took a chance on me, and this would be his big payday, too.”
“I get that. Sacrificing what you want for someone else.” She bites her lip, then continues. “The question is, though … is what someone else wants for you enough to give up what you want for yourself?”
The kitchen is quiet, and in some ways this seemingly bubbly girl has cut straight to the heart of things. She doesn’t tiptoe, or beat around the bush. She says the scary truth, asks the hard questions. When I’m with her, there isn’t room to run.
“You know about that, Tess?” I ask her. “Making that hard choice?”
“Yeah, but I’m the selfish one. I took what I wanted.” She leans against the island, looks straight at me.
“And what was that?”
“I wanted out, so I left.”
“Out? What do you mean, Tess? Out of what?”
Just then a roar from the street below breaks our intimate moment.
“What was that?” she asks, her eyes wide.
“Sounds like tanks rolling down the road.” We walk toward the wall of windows to see what is happening. A massive motorcycle club weaves through the street, easily fifty bikes in an impressive diamond-shaped riding pattern.
“No,” Tess says, stepping away from the window. “It can’t be. They can’t have gotten here so fast.”
“Who? What do you mean?”
Tess’s face has gone white; her whole body shakes.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“Jack,” she says, trembling. “I ran from my family because they’re the Anarchy Motorcycle Gang. And they’re here. Here for me.”
Chapter Fourteen
TESS
The roaring bikes below send a wave of memories through me.
I steady myself with Jack’s arm, reaching for him, holding tight. Closing my eyes, I blink away my past, but it’s surfacing faster than I can stop it.
Me, forced to clean.
Me, forced to beg.
Me, forced to fuck.
My life on the compound was never easy, never good. There aren’t any memories that feel right, feel whole.
It was all shattered chaos. Strong men and submissive women. Angry guys and lost girls.
I wasn’t like the rest of them.
I was Daddy’s Little Girl, but what good did that do me, in the end?
In the end it wasn’t my father I hurt.
It was my mother.
And that makes me either a sinner or a saint.
Depends on the day.
I read the self-help books, desperate to find a way out of the past, a way to grieve, to let go, to heal. But it’s easier when the Brotherhood is three states away.
Not as easy when they’re rolling down the road, fifteen stories below, looking for me.
“Tess, what is going on?” Jack says, pulling me tight against him. I claw at his back, holding on so tight. My quaking heart beats so fast as it presses against Jack’s. And this is where I want to stay.
I want him to protect me, to be the man I always wanted and never knew I’d find. The man who won’t hurt me, because Jack Harris wouldn’t hurt a fly. The man who stayed with Ashley even though she was a witch, the man who will sign a ten-year contract because he wants to do right by his agent. The man who honors, protects, works hard, and knows how to commit.
He’s the man I need, the man I want.
He kisses my forehead. “You’ve got to talk, Tess.”
But what do I say? This is the moment I’ve been terrified of. This is the moment that will force me back to where I came from.
The moment that will force me from Jack’s arms, because once he knows he’ll never, ever look at me the same way again. He might not want to look at me at all.
“I can’t be here. They’re going to come after me, Jack.”
“Who?”
“The bikers. They’re my family. They’re the people who are looking for me ... who I knew would find me.”