Into Your Arms (Squad Stories #1)(35)

"Are you going to tap that? Ever?" He jerks his chin toward Freya. Am I that obvious?

Yeah, probably.

"I don't think so. I'm attempting to get to the friend stage." He makes a hissing noise.

"I wouldn't. Because then you'll never make it to the next stage if you become her friend." I want to tell him that the whole "friendzone" thing is complete bullshit and that male and female friends fall in love all the time, but it's too fucking early. Normally I'm up and ready to go, but not today. I couldn't sleep last night. The bus ride is going to be several hours, so I'm hoping I can crash.

"I'll figure it out," I mumble, pulling out my earbuds and plugging them into my phone. I give him a grin and pop them in my ears and lean against the window. Hopefully that will send the message that I am not up for a chat about Freya.

A few minutes later, he does the same, and soon I'm drifting off to the sounds of Hozier.

* * *

The rest of the day passes in a blur. I try to stay focused on cheering and stunting and remembering the changes to the dance we learned this week, but my mind is on Freya. It doesn't help that she's standing a few feet away and is the one I'm stunting with.

I make sure not to touch her any more than necessary and shake my head when she offers me a bottle of water, even though I'm dying because I forgot my regular bottle at the hotel.

She gives me a weird look and shrugs.

After the game, we all pile into a local pizza joint and consume as much as we can while we can still move. I end up sitting with most of the guys, and Freya is with her girls. Funny how we still sometimes split along gender lines like that. I keep glancing back at Freya, but she's too busy laughing and chatting to notice me. She has a whole life that has nothing to do with me, but I'm not jealous. I just wish I could be next to her. Or even near her.

"You've got it bad," Clint says, elbowing me.

I just growl under my breath and wait for him to get distracted by drink refills. We're not allowed to drink during school trips, so Coach wouldn't let us order a pitcher of beer. I wish I had a few drinks right now, actually.

A few more hours of staring at Freya later, we head back to the hotel. There were whispers about sneaking out and hitting up a bar, but no one was serious. That would be grounds for getting kicked off the team, and it's just not worth it. Now if we were hockey players, maybe we could get away with it. They seemed to get away with everything because they bring a shit-ton of money to the university. Cheerleaders, not so much.

Clint heads for the shower right when we get back, and I turn on the TV and flick through the channels. Freya is just down the hall. If this was a movie, I might go and knock on her door and she'd answer it wearing something skimpy. A tank top and boxers, maybe. And she'd hold the door aside and invite me in.



       
         
       
        

But this is real fucking life, and she's staying with three other girls, so that's not going to happen. I flip through the channels and think about why the fuck I'm doing this.

If I didn't enjoy cheer, I wouldn't be doing it. But being so close to Freya is fucking with my head.

I think . . . I think I need to ask Coach to put her with another stunt partner. That we're having a conflict. I have no idea if she'll go for it, but she might. It's just too hard.

Freya

Back at the hotel, we all change into comfy clothes and pull out our bottles of nail polish and stock up on snacks from the vending machine. We're goofy and giggly and it's almost like being a kid again. Most of my sleepovers were just with Mia. I didn't go to a lot of group events.

"I feel like we're going to sit around and talk about boys or something," Tobi says while I work on her toes. Once I'm done, she's going to do mine. Willow and Carrie are doing each other's toes simultaneously, but they've clearly had practice.

"Ahem," Carrie says and Tobi rolls her eyes. Willow sticks her tongue out at Tobi.

"You know what I mean. This just feels like going back in time or something. I like it. I haven't done anything like this for ages." Tobi rests her chin on her knee that's pulled up while I work on her other foot.

"I avoided sleepovers for the most part," Willow says, holding up Carrie's foot and blowing on it, causing Carrie to giggle. "I always felt weird when the time would come to put on pajamas and all the other girls would start taking their clothes off. Ah, hindsight. You bitch." She and Willow giggle together, and I find myself feeling envious. Of the way they look at each other. Of the way they casually sit and touch one another. Of how easy it seems for them.