“I’m going to Atlanta.” He stops and stares at me, his eyes reflecting uncertainty with his decision.
Without flinching, I cross the room and embrace him. “That’s very brave.”
He doesn’t respond to my hug, so I draw back. He catches my hands in his and caresses them with his thumbs. I love the sensation of him drawing these gentle circles on my skin.
His face wrinkles under the strain of anxiety. “Will you come with me?”
My mouth falls open at his request. His eyes narrow and brows arch.
I’m simultaneously overwhelmed and terrified. This confrontation may well be the biggest moment of his life. I’m not convinced my presence is a great idea. But, after what I’ve done, he’s taking a huge leap of faith by extending the invitation.
I can’t possibly refuse.
“If you want me to come, I’ll be there.”
His worried expression fades into a shy smile. “Thanks.” He pulls me into a brief hug, releasing me too soon.
I hesitate, unsure whether he plans to say more about my snooping. When he doesn’t, I decide to let it go.
“So, when are we taking this trip?” I ask, once he steps back from me.
“Before I change my mind. I’ll purchase the tickets and pay for the hotel rooms. Leave Thursday, return Friday?”
“Oh, okay.” Separate rooms—a good, if disappointing, idea. I smile awkwardly. “I don’t have any plans, so that’s fine.”
He holds my gaze. “Thanks.”
Questions tumble from my mouth when he starts to leave.
“Wait a sec, can’t we talk?” I motion to the sofa and take a seat myself.
Levi hesitates before sitting. His typically calm, controlled demeanor is replaced with the air of a young, uncertain boy.
“I don’t want to talk about what you did, Lindsey. I’m not happy about it, mostly because you hid it from me for weeks. It makes it difficult to trust you, but I’m trying to keep it in perspective.”
The hard edge of his voice signifies the extreme difficulty he’s having giving me a second chance. His steely hazel eyes remain aloof and detached, but don’t scare me away from speaking my mind.
“I understand. That’s not what I want to talk about, though.” I’m leaning forward, resting my elbows on my knees. “I want to ask about the trip. What’s your goal? Only yesterday you wouldn’t even consider seeing her. What’s changed?”
“I don’t know exactly.” He scratches the back of his neck. “I don’t want to talk about it, though.”
“How will you talk to her if you can’t even discuss it with me? Maybe we should role-play or something?”
He smiles for the first time today, apparently amused by my suggestion.
“Role-play? Jesus, I haven’t seen the woman in more than twenty years.” He’s closed himself up again. The air around him pulses with frenetic energy. “I have no idea what she’ll say, or do, when I show up. This isn’t the kind of discussion we can plan.”
“Well, what do you remember about her?”
“Not much. I’ve blocked a lot of it out.” The left side of his lip curls upward. “She’s nothing like you.”
“I hope not. I’d never leave my child.” Fudge. I need a filter!
His brows leap upward. “Look, I thought I’d handle it better if you were close by, but I don’t expect you to be involved.”
“Well, do you hope for some kind of reconciliation? Do you want a relationship with her in the future?”
His features pinch in discomfort. “No! I don’t know. It’s complicated. I need answers, mostly.” His gaze shifts. “I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
“Okay.” Since he appears to be on the edge of an explosion, I concede.
“I’ll let you know once I have our itinerary.” He stands. “Thanks for coming with me.”
“Thanks for asking.” I smile broadly. Before I can ask him to stay for dinner, my phone rings. I view the screen and grimace.
“Hi, Mom.”
Levi waves and silently exits through the screen door. Although I’m disappointed he made no effort to stay, I’m thrilled that he asked me to accompany him to Atlanta. It’s a significant step, and even though he’s still mistrustful, I now know I’m important to him.
My mom’s voice interrupts my reverie. “Hi, honey. I’m calling to see if you plan to come home for your father’s birthday next month.”
I take the gooey ice cream carton to the garbage and toss the spoon in the sink. “Oh, that’s right. Are you planning a big party?”