Was it jealousy? No, that was preposterous. What did she have to be jealous of? Confusion? Well, confusion was definitely part of what was at play within her heart. Jennifer was certain she didn't want to acknowledge what the feeling was, but as soon as she began to question herself, she could name it immediately. It was guilt.
An awful sense of guilty dread.
Jennifer looked up and caught James's gaze. Neither looked away. In the brief moment their eyes held before she pulled away to interest herself with the world outside as the small jet began to roll unhurriedly forward, she found herself wondering if it was possible to be in love with two men at the same time.
Chapter Seven
Check Mate
With tingling fingertips, James let his body relax into the plump, leather chair and eyed Jennifer coolly. He thought that it was funny how she avoided his eyes. First, she stared out the window, then at the floor. Once the floor was no longer appealing, James watched her rummage through her purse. Between them, there was absolute silence.
In the past, it never would have bothered him. It never seemed to bother Jennifer, or at least from what he understood from riding with her business first class. Today, however, she was definitely jittery. His hands tingled at the thought of getting to touch her silky, smooth skin again.
Maybe he was wrong for what he was doing. He honestly didn't think he knew. He wasn't over stepping his boundaries, was he? He had every right just as much as the next man to tell Jennifer his true feelings. He did that. Giving her a taste of what life could be like if she were to choose him … well, any man could do that too, right?
And he wasn't really doing that. This was a business trip, through and through … with something a little extra in it for him. He grinned and found his eyes trailing the length of Jennifer's body. Her eyes were hidden from sight behind a compact mirror she had risen to check her reflection.
James didn't understand why she seemed so self-conscious around him. She had to know that she was always gorgeous. At the moment, she was tousling her straight hair, as if she wished it had more volume. Grinning, James leaned to the left to catch Jennifer's eyes. It took a moment, but she glanced at him. Seconds later, she gave him a longer look.
"Checking yourself out again?" He teased. "You look beautiful, as always, Angel. Why don't you relax some?" James watched Jennifer carefully as he spoke. He couldn't mistake the way she lost her breath as he used her pet name. He didn't want to overdo it though and overstep his boundaries.
Jennifer had never told him how she felt about him, but with the way she always acted in his presence, she really didn't need to. Well, there was the one night when he had to pick her up from the party; but, she was intoxicated and so he never counted that. Still, clearly, he never forgot it either. He planned to bring it up and get the truth about her feelings for him out in the open.
If they both wanted to be together, what could really stop them? They had history. Sure, most of it was a working history, but you get to know someone when you work as closely as they worked. In fact, it was really a mystery that nothing had ever become of them before, or was it?
Isn't that the reason why he decided to date Katie? To keep his feelings and attraction for Jennifer at bay? He was a focused man. Several years ago, love wasn't what he was focused on. Money was. Katie was just a distraction from Jennifer, in the beginning. Somewhere along the line, she became more to him. Still, if he were being honest, he had still felt empty inside when he was around her.
Did he have fun? Absolutely. Great in the bed, perfect model 10 body, the whole nine yards. But she wasn't Jennifer. James had to accept that; and, like a man, he had. That's when he decided that it was time to shit or get off the pot.
He wanted to put Jennifer out of his mind for good and the only way he really knew how to do that was with marriage. Wasn't that what every woman wanted at the end of the day? A man that vowed to want her just as much that day as he would 100 days from then and even 1000 days more?
That's the kind of man James was. He would have loved to give Jennifer that commitment, but at the time, he made a call he only regretted now.
Once he and Katie were through, he realized that it wasn't too late after all. He might have missed his prime opportune time by waiting all those years-if he didn't dip town, he could have told Jennifer exactly how he felt right then and there. But, that's not how it worked out.
He left the playing field wide open for someone else to come in and take his place. He had taken Jennifer for granted. He saw that now. It had been a blessing that she had never dated anyone else after that Dick-guy. He might have messed things up, but he was a fixer. He could fix this.
When he caught eyes with Jennifer, he knew he made her heart race. That wasn't him just thinking too much about himself either. He felt the way she jumped when he touched her. He attributed some of the jumpiness because from what she told him on Friday, she appeared to be a taken woman. Still, until she directly said no, he wasn't going to stop; and at the moment, he was greedily eyeing the drying scrape on her knee.
As soon as they hit cruising speed he wanted to dress that knee and use every opportunity at his disposal to feel her again. She was so full and soft. He regretted never making excuses to touch her before.
In the seat across from James, Jennifer squirmed. Carolyn's voice sounded through the overhead speakers.
"Ladies and gentlemen, the Captain has turned off the Fasten Seat Belt sign, and you are now free to move around the cabin."
James flashed Carolyn a smile from where she sat in a bucket seat near the sealed door. She was already up and crouched in front of a small safe-like box, which held the inflight meals that were already prepped and ready to be served. James always thought the speakers and intercoms were a bit much, but he liked the small personable atmosphere of the chartered jet flights.
No sooner than Carolyn had announced their freedom that James released his seat belt and leaned forward, stretching out a hand to Jennifer's knee. He couldn't reach it. She was still several inches away from the edge of his fingertips, but he couldn't mistake the way she inched away from him, as if avoiding a dangerous venomous snake. He raised an eyebrow at her and smirked.
"We should take care of your knee," he nodded to the chair on his left. "Come over here and I'll clean it for you."
He watched Jennifer hesitate. She eyed the chair that held the first aid kit, but didn't readily move. James chuckled. He anticipated her to be a little on the defense with him. He could handle that. To him, it was like working a negotiation. You just had to get the other party to let their guard down; but Jennifer wasn't like the other men he negotiated pay and contracts with. She was a woman. He hated to say this, but women were easy. It just took a little patience and time.
"Why do you keep looking at me like that?" James asked. He knew the answer, but loved watching her squirm. The more at ease she felt in the midst of his calm demeanor would only help her to relax all the sooner. Jennifer took a steady breath and narrowed her eyes at him.
"I guess I'm just trying to figure you out," she answered honestly.
James took her answer and mulled it over in his mind. He decided not to take the bait and gestured to the seat again.
"Let's patch your knee up before we eat, okay?"
Jennifer nodded weakly and released her seat belt. She stretched a long, beautiful leg out for support and moved fluidly from one seat diagonally into the other, moving the small box of supplies as she did.
It was her left knee that had hit the concrete. It was nothing more than a child's skinned kneecap, but the idea of her beautiful legs becoming scared bothered James.
Leaning across the edge of her lap, James slipped his left hand beneath her knee and grinned. He felt her body tense at his grip again. She was probably even holding her breath. He pressed his lips together to keep from chuckling aloud.
"It's just a minor scrap," James said at last to break the silence. "Nothing a little alcohol pad, Neosporin, and band aid can't heal right away." He turned and met Jennifer's eyes casually. "Do you want me to do it?"
She smirked at him, and then forced a grin. "Sure. You seem pretty keen on touching me today anyway."
The sudden bluntness startled James. He chuckled awkwardly, then looked away to grab the supplies. He slipped his hand from the back of her knee and decided to tone his actions down. Jennifer always knew how to throw a curve ball at him.
He used a cleansing pad to wipe away the dried blood. Jennifer winced a bit due to slight pain, but said nothing more. He applied a band-aid after squeezing a dab of Neosporin onto the wound. When he was finished, they both leaned towards her knee and poked at the pad of the band-aid with the tip of their index finger. Jennifer chuckled, and then straightened herself.