In His Keeping(132)
“Fuck,” he muttered. More slapping. “That was smooth.” More thudding his head against his palm. “Jesus, I’ve been waiting for this moment. I’ve wanted this moment. With you. I’ve imagined it in my head a million times. It’s all I’ve thought of. And when I finally get to the big event, the one where I tell you that you’re my entire fucking world and that I don’t want to live my life without you I freeze up, and all I can manage is three words with no preamble, no context, no buildup.”
He sighed, a mournful, disgusted sound.
“I’m so sorry, Ari. I completely fucked this up.”
She smiled, her eyes lighting up like he’d just laid the world at her feet. Was it possible she returned his love? That she had the same dreams and desires he did?
“It may not have been the most eloquent declaration in the world, but it was utterly perfect,” she said in a dreamy, satisfied voice. “I mean who can argue with phrases like ‘You’re my fucking world’ and ‘I don’t want to live my life without you’?”
She patted the space beside her on the bed. “Come here.”
He leaned farther toward her and then, as her mom had done that first visit, he carefully slid his ass onto the edge of the bed, ensuring he didn’t jostle her in any way. And then his eyes narrowed, but not before she saw stark vulnerability reflected in them.
“Do you have something you’d like to say to me?” he asked pointedly.
She nearly laughed, but he looked too close to being sick for her to tease him. She could swear he was sweating.
She crooked her finger at him, making him lean farther and farther until their faces were mere inches apart. Then she slid her arms loosely around his neck and pulled him into her kiss.
“I love you too,” she whispered
He immediately sagged, closing his eyes. He rested his forehead against hers, his breaths coming in ragged bursts over her chin. He lifted his hand to caress one side of her face, sliding his fingers around and then thrusting upward into the thick mass of her hair.
“Thank God,” he whispered back. “Thank God. I thought I was flying solo on this one and it wasn’t a pleasant thought at all.”
He gave her a light smooch, peppering tiny kisses along the entire arch of her mouth.
“Will you marry me?”
“Hmm, that depends,” she said, waiting for his reaction. He was going to kill her because he was sweating bullets and she was teasing him mercilessly.
“On what?” He sounded outraged.
She waggled her free hand at him. “The ring, of course.”
He chuckled, shaking his head. “I think I can manage a ring. Now, if I promise to deliver the perfect ring, will you marry me? Please?”
“I’m a sucker for please,” she grumbled.
“Wish I’d have known that sooner,” he said dryly.
“Yes, I’ll marry you, Beau,” she said, suddenly growing more serious. “I can’t imagine not being with you now. I don’t want to imagine it or live it. I dearly love my parents, but I had already moved out on my own, even if I was more dependent on them than I liked.”
“I’ll build the most fucking amazing house you’ve ever seen,” he vowed.
“How many kids, er-um, bedrooms will we need?”
His eyes narrowed for a moment, almost as if he were trying to ascertain whether she was yanking his chain again.
“How many do you want?” he asked, turning it around on her.
“At least four,” she said, a contented smile on her face as she imagined a house full of children. Her parents visiting their grandchildren. Watching her children wrestle with their father on the floor.
He lifted his eyebrows. “Four, huh. Sounds like I have a lot of work to do.”
Her mouth dropped open. “A lot of work you have to do? What the heck does a guy do except get a really good orgasm? The woman carries the baby around for nine months and . . .”
She broke off and then glared at him when she realized he was merely dishing it back at her and yanking her chain. “Just for that, you draw diaper duty for the first nine months to offset the nine months I carry them around inside me.”
She sent him a smug look that dared him to top that.
His features softened, and a warm smile lit his face. “When will you marry me? Or maybe I should ask how soon will you marry me?”
She could feel herself softening just as he’d done. Her heart contracting under his bone-melting smile.
“As soon as my cast comes off,” she said, looking down in disgust at her plaster-covered hip and thigh. “I want a wedding, honeymoon, the entire shebang, and I can hardly enjoy any of that with my clunky cast on.”