In Harmony(18)

I had no life left. My entire existence for almost four years had been about music; it was only when that was taken away that I could see how little else I had. Even my friends were Fenbrook students. How long would we stay in touch when I was back in Boston, working whatever job I could find?

I had…nothing.

I pulled my phone out of my bag and it sat in my hand like a lead weight. I tapped the shortcut for my father and then sat staring at his name on the screen, trying to work up the courage to press the Call button.

A girl’s voice behind me. “He hasn’t even chosen yet. I keep telling him, and he’s like,”—she did a fair imitation of an Irish accent—“Ah, I’m not gonna bother. I’m droppin’ out anyway.”

The words had to rattle around in my head a few times before I could be sure I’d heard correctly. Then I twisted around in my chair.

I recognized the girl from some of my classes. One of the non-classical musicians—a drummer—her hair dyed violently pink, a spiky-ended bar through her nose.

“Are you talking about Connor Locke?” I asked breathlessly.

For a second, she looked like she was going to tell me to mind my own business, but then her expression softened. “Yeah,” she said.

“He hasn’t chosen his recital piece yet?”

She shrugged. “No. Why would he? He’s going to be kicked out any time.”

Air filled my lungs. It felt like the first time I’d breathed since Professor Harman’s office. I grabbed my cello and ran.



***



When I burst into Professor Harman’s office, he was on the phone. I was panting, having run up the stairs lugging the cello.

“Connor…Locke…hasn’t…chosen yet,” I told him, trying to get my breath.

He blinked. “I’ll call you back,” he told the person on the other end, and hung up. “Well, yes. I just checked the list—he’s the only one who hasn’t. We weren’t really expecting him to. So?”

“I want to team up with him.”

He blinked a few times. “You want to do a duet for cello and electric guitar?!”

I took a deep breath. “Yes.”

“With Connor Locke?”

“Yes.”

He shook his head slowly. “Karen, I can’t really discuss another student with you, but you must know that Connor’s on the verge of being kicked out. It’s really just a question of whether he drops out or we give him a push. It’s only a matter of time.”

“But if I can keep him in?” I said desperately. “If I can keep him in until graduation and if we can do a great duet—I could still graduate…right?”

He took a deep breath and then sighed. I could tell he wanted to say no. But strict rules cut both ways.

“Yes,” he told me. “In theory, if he doesn’t flunk out, and if you score highly enough in the recital…yes, you’ll graduate.”

“I want to do it,” I said.

“Karen, I honestly admire your spirit. I know you didn’t take the news well, but…what makes you think you can even convince Connor to do it?”

“I have to try!”

He took a long look at me and then sighed. “I think you’re wasting your time. But if you really want to do this, I need both of you in here at 9:00am tomorrow to give me your choice of music.”

I nodded and ran.



***



I was halfway down the corridor before I slowed to a walk. My mind was buzzing with excitement. The tiny sliver of light I’d glimpsed in Harper’s had widened to a crack. Maybe one big enough for me to squeeze through, if I could tease it open.

There was so much to do. I had to find Connor and get him alone. Sit him down and talk to him.

I slowed more. Talk to him…. Talk to a guy who drove me crazy every time we met. Who was arrogant and loud and brash and only interested in women if he thought they’d drop their panties for him.

And it wasn’t just a one-off conversation. If he agreed to do it, we’d be rehearsing together constantly for months.

If he agreed to do it. This was Connor I was talking about. Connor who showed up for classes when it suited him. Connor who hadn’t intended to even submit a choice for the recital, much less rehearse for it.

I stopped in my tracks.

Was I seriously hitching my entire future to the least reliable guy at the academy? He was about to flunk out, and I needed him to be the best.

I leaned back against the wall and then slid down it to the floor.

It came down to a simple question: Was I prepared to go through hell with Connor to get my life back?

I knew instantly. It wasn’t even a choice. If I gave up now and didn’t at least try, I’d regret it for the rest of my life.