Ava Readsalot: Totally doing a contest for your book on my page, spread the word.
Seen 4:26 pm
Ryder is typing…
Ryder Matthews: Thanks, baby!
Ava Readsalot: I missed you.
Ryder Matthews: I miss you too.
Ava Readsalot: How is the book?
Ryder Matthews: Coming.
Ava Readsalot: Do you need inspiration?
Ryder Matthews: What do you have in mind?
Ava Readsalot: Plans tonight?
Ryder Matthews: No can do, sorry.
Ava Readsalot: :- (
Ava Readsalot: I wish I could do something to help.
Ryder Matthews: Your smile inspires me…
I click my finger over the little tiny camera, and snap a picture of me smiling.
Ryder Matthews: Beautiful.
Ava Readsalot: Thanks
Ryder Matthews: Ok baby, I’ve to go write.
Ava Readsalot: xoxo all my <3
The feeling of relief that floods me is not natural. Although a short conversation, it reassures me in ways that only Ryder can. I pick up the phone and call Jules. We shoot the shit for a few minutes but ultimately I decide to stay home alone and cuddle up with my Kindle and a glass of wine.
A few hours pass, and I’m curled up in my bed, reading my Kindle. After my first glass of Burgundy, the aroma of the rich liquid beckons me to indulge some more. Alexandre would cringe if he knew I had a bottle of wine in our all white room. I grab the drink, the crimson liquid sloshing in the crystal glass. I turn back in my drunken haze to my reading. The passage in my book is steamy, and the air around me becomes thick with need. I reach for my phone, my hands shaking. Ryder picks up on the third ring.
“I wish I could see you,” I plead faintly into the phone.
“I know, Ava, but I’m working.”
“I miss you, I just want…” My words come out jumbled as I stop myself from begging for him to come over.
“What do you want, Ava?” The baritone of his words makes me flush.
“You. I want you.”
“I want you too. I want all of you. I want to feel you quiver and fall apart around me.”
A soft moan leaves my mouth.
“Do you want that, Ava?”
“Yes.” I breathe out.
“Do you want me to taste you? Every single inch of your body?” He rasps into the phone. “To feel my tongue licking…”
Hearing these words is all I need. My hormones go into overload. A soft cry escapes as my fingertips trail slowly down, softly, stroking gently. “Oh God,” I moan. A light sweat breaking out across my brow.
“Can you imagine my fingers teasing you? Dipping inside?”
As he continues to whisper hushed words of passion, my breathing accelerates, my movements become more choppy, my pace reflects how I feel, fast and reckless. His voice is rich and husky. The silky tone when he speaks brings me closer and closer to falling over into the abyss. My skin pebbles, and a chill runs down my spine. Biting my lower lip, sparks start to form deep into my soul; a fire kindles within me.
My breath catches in my throat, my vision blurs. I explode from the inside out.
My body shudders, and as my trembling ebbs away, I start to realize what I’d just done. The temperature in the room becomes sweltering as the embarrassment sets in.
“I, I have to go,” I stutter.
A thunderous laughs erupts through the phone. I want to die of embarrassment but as he continues to laugh I relax to the sound. “Okay, baby, sleep well.” I can imagine him smirking on the other end of the phone as he speaks.
“Goodnight, Ryder.”
My bashfulness fades away.
A FEW DAYS PASS, and Alexandre is scheduled to be home today, which is Tuesday. The last few days have been invigorating. Without Alexandre in the house, the happiness I feel is abundant. I don’t have to pretend. I don’t have to guard my words. I can just be me. I see a notification on the right side of my computer screen, Ryder has commented on a post.
Ava Readsalot: Hi!
Ryder Matthews: Hey, baby.
Ava Readsalot: What are you doing?
Ryder Matthews: Making a teaser.
Ava Readsalot: Want some help?
Ryder Matthews: That’s not what I want you for.
Ava Readsalot: So what do you want from me??
Ryder Matthews: I want you to live for me. Breathe for me. I want to make you mine.
Ava Readsalot: Done, Done, Almost.
Ava Readsalot: Well I can't breathe without thinking of you, does that count for anything?
Ryder Matthews: Yes, it counts for some but not all Ava.
Ava Readsalot: Does it help that thoughts of you consume me, morning day and night.
Ryder Matthews: Yes.
Ava Readsalot: Does that make you happy?
Ryder Matthews: More than you know.
Ava Readsalot: Good.
I capture all his words in my mind, holding them, cherishing them. I know unequivocally, he will be my downfall. My heart is just waiting to be broken.