But I had my pride. So I pushed myself off the wall and said stiffly, "I see."
"It's useless," he continued, raking a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry, Yanna, I know I promised but---"
"It's okay," I told him tonelessly. What else was there to say? I sure as heck wasn't going to beg him to come back.
Constantijin's face showed his surprise. "It's okay?"
I forced myself to look nonplussed. "Yes."
He looked at me, eyes narrowed. "Then what's your answer?"
"I---" Wait. What did he say? I cleared my throat. "Well..." What did he mean?
"I don't need you to say you'll go out with me right away but if you could just give me a goddamn clue about how you feel," he muttered.
Constantijin tossed me an accusing glance. "The whole week had been fucking hard. It was hell not to touch you even though I had you alone with me all those nights. I wanted you to realize that it isn't just sex between us. I was willing to wait but when I saw that boy hitting on you again---"
He glanced at me, as if waiting for an answer. When I still didn't – couldn't – speak, he growled, "Say something, for fuck's sake!"
How could I when he had totally taken me by surprise? When he said things weren't working between us, my heart had died. And then now, he was saying in not so many words that all that he couldn't go on without me giving him even the smallest sign that we still had a chance to be together.
I wanted to laugh hysterically.
A chance?
Didn't he know he had hundreds of them, with how crazy I was about him?
I looked at him and felt my heart melting even more. He made my heart feel like ice cream fried by a desert sun, all soft and gooey with just one emotion-filled glance from his silvery eyes.
I inhaled deeply several times.
Okay, I'm ready for this.
Not.
I inhaled several times more.
"Yanna?" His tone was alarmed.
I supposed I looked like a ghost right now. I could actually feel the blood leaving my system and I was just contemplating what I was about to do. This was such a huge step for me.
"I … I … " I couldn't say it!
So I decided to just do it instead.
"Yan---" He grunted, his turn to be taken by surprise as I flung myself at him, my lips fortunately landing squarely on his lips. My tongue immediately darted inside his mouth, and I felt him gasp against my lips. That had me smiling and I closed my eyes in utter bliss when Constantijin recovered from his shock and took over, his hands immediately hauling me close as he deepened the kiss, his tongue dancing with mine.
"Is this for real?" he whispered against my lips.
"Yes," I choked out.
The kiss changed from sweet to hot in an instant. Constantijin had my blouse unbuttoned in seconds, throwing it with my bra to the floor, and then he was staring at my breasts almost worshipfully.
"Constantijin." I could feel myself blushing all over at his stare.
"Hold your breasts for me," he ordered, his voice strongly accented.
With shaking hands, I followed his command, plumping my breasts up as if waiting for his approval.
A low sexy growl escaped his mouth, making my toes curl, and then he was sucking my already pointed nipple. I threw back my head and moaned.
This made him suck harder and of course it made me moan louder. It was a cycle that had us both panting in desire in seconds. He swept me in his arms and mine went around his neck. I was still breathing hard, my breasts crazily sensitive and aching every time I bounced in his arms as he moved.
Constantijin used his foot to pull his executive chair from behind the desk and into the middle of the room. He lowered me gently to it and I watched in breathless fascination as he pulled my skirt and lacy briefs down, tossing them to the floor as well.
Then he was staring at my sex.
I immediately tried to close my thighs, but his harsh-sounding ;no' stopped me.
"Place your legs over the arm rests, Yanna."
I froze.
Constantijin's face was implacable. "Do it."
Slowly, I lifted my legs and placed one on each armrest.
"Open wider."
Striving to get past my embarrassment, I pushed my thighs to open wider with my hands. I gasped when Constantijin suddenly knelt down and I gasped again when he parted my folds as widely open as my thighs.
"Constantijin!" I had to scream his name. It was impossible not to, with his tongue entering my fully opened sex.
He lifted his head, his eyes glittering with fierce desire as he warned me with silky softness, "Don't let go of your thighs. Keep it open for me."
My entire body shaking, I pressed my hands harder against my thighs to keep it spread open, whimpering as I saw his head slowly descending. And then his tongue was on me again and I screamed. He was unmerciful, his tongue thrusting in and out in a furiously fast rhythm that had the entire room whirling around me.
I was so out of my mind with desire and I felt myself perversely pulling my thighs wider open even though what I really wanted to do was to grasp his hair so I could make him kiss me more deeply.
Constantijin lifted his head again. "Do you like it?"
"Wh-what do you think?" I managed to gasp.
"What do I think?" he murmured. "I think I want you to beg."
The smirk I hated and loved was on his face and I retorted breathlessly, "Not on your---aaaah." Constantijin was now sucking my clit while shoving one finger into me at the same time. My hips rose to meet his mouth and finger even as I kept pushing them to spread wider.
"Wider," he commanded between sucking hard on my clit and I struggled to obey him even though I felt myself stretched beyond my limits.
"Are you ready to come, Yanna?"
"Yes," I cried out. I was gone now, every common sense obliterated by my need for him and what he could do to my body.
"Beg for it," he growled.
"Constantijin, please!"
One hand went under my buttocks and then he was lifting me up at the same time he bit my clit, his other fingers thrusting in deep and hard into my core. I screamed as I shattered, my hands instinctively pressing my legs flat on the armrest as my essence kept pouring out.
I woke up in Constantijin's arms in his couch, spread on top of him like a harem slave intent on being turned into a human blanket. I blinked, a little dazed at first and then I was blushing when I saw his smile. It made me remember what had just happened.
"Welcome back, schat." He pressed a kiss to my hair.
My entire body tingled at his kiss. I was still completely naked and he was still fully dressed. It should have felt wrong but it didn't. I wrapped my arms more tightly around him. A surprised-sounding chuckle escaped him before he wrapped his arms around me as well.
I snuggled closer, mostly because I liked knowing that I had the right to do this.
"Damn, but you feel fucking good in my arms."
I giggled.
He lifted my chin, and my breath caught at the gentle smile on his lips. "It's true."
Oh, Lord. Constantijin in a tender mood was a sight to behold.
"It feels good, too," I admitted shyly.
As the minutes passed, I found myself slowly getting panicking. What had I done? What was going to happen? There was no turning back now! Oh my God, I was going to have sex with Constantijin someday!
"What are you thinking?"
"That you'd take my virginity someday?" Oh, fuck. What did I say?
Constantijin choked.
And under me, I felt him stirring to life.
I blushed.
Seeing that, he grinned. Cupping my face, Constantijin said, "It's not the right time yet but soon – very soon – I will take your virginity."
Faking a frown, I retorted, "Confident much?"
A slow, sexy, and unapologetically confident grin was his only answer. It was enough to have my body heat up. Then his eyes trailed down, and I gasped, remembering belatedly that I was still naked and he was not.
I looked around wildly, wondering how I could get myself dressed again when my clothes were all over his office.
Constantijin chuckled. "Let me help you dress, sweetheart." He stood right after, carrying me in his arms effortlessly before letting me carefully slide down to my feet. I stood there, feeling even shyer as he picked up my bra first.
My body tingled as Constantijin pressed one kiss on each nipple before putting my bra back on and even clipping it for me.
Then he knelt down.
"Constantijin!" But it was too late. My hands curled around his shoulders helplessly as he tongued my clit playfully and sweetly, nipping it before letting go and grinning up at me.
Breathless and aching, I glared down at him. "You … " Words failed me and I could only continue glaring at him impotently as he lifted one of my legs up, pressing a tender kiss on my foot before putting my lacy briefs back on. When both legs were in, Constantijin pulled it up with exquisite slowness, placing more tender kisses on my skin as I did. By the time he was done, I was a shaking mess, and all I could think about was why? Why wasn't he going to take my virginity now?