"Maybe someday, when you are with him longer, I'll tell you why. I probably have to, one way or another."
Her words were so cryptic I couldn't help wondering what she and Constantijin seemed to be hiding from the whole world. Margaret suddenly lifted her hand and waved.
In a few seconds, Constantijin was at our side and Margaret was telling him to take me to the dance floor.
Whoa!
"I … " I couldn't really say ;no', not with Margaret smiling at us expectantly and everyone looking our way.
Constantijin grinned at his mother.
She answered with a smirk. "You're welcome."
And then Constantijin was whisking me to the dance floor, his hands spanning my waist as the DJ played a slow jam mix of something by One Republic and Ne-Yo.
I stood stiffly in the circle of his arms.
"Look at me, Yanna."
"No." I forced myself to smile when I realized that a lot of people were looking at us. Acting stiff was expected – he was the CEO and I was not - but looking angry meant having something more than what's right between us.
But God, it felt so incredibly good to be back in his arms. Too good.
Constantijin said harshly, "I'm sorry."
I kept my gaze stubbornly over his shoulders even though my stomach twisted at the ragged sincerity in his voice.
"I fucked up."
Can't believe him, can't listen to him, can't---
"I talked to my mom about you. I told her everything."
My head jerked up at that. "You what?"
His eyes bored into me. "You didn't want to talk to me, and I didn't know how to reach out to you."
"B-but why your mom?"
"Do I look like the kind to have a platonic girl friend?"
He had a point, but … I glared up at him. "Seriously, your mom?"
Constantijin bit out, "It was either my mom or Charli. Do you prefer I had talked to your boss instead?"
Darn it. He had a point with that, too.
Constantijin seemed visibly struggling to find the next words to say. It was rare for him to be lost for words, and I couldn't help but stare at him even as my whole body prickled in acute awareness of his nearness, his scent, his very hardness.
"Yanna---I never had a relationship in my whole life."
I tripped – or would have if he hadn't swiftly caught me, his hands tightening around my waist. My eyes were locked with his, which blazed with emotion. "Never?" I whispered.
He said roughly, "There was a girl I dated briefly when I was in my teens, but other than that---I never found a reason to tie myself to one woman, never been interested in being faithful." His grip tightening even more, he said, "I hated how you always seemed to have the upper hand between us, never giving me a straight answer---"
"Because you were asking things you didn't have the right to ask!" I half shrieked.
Constantijin coughed.
That alone was enough to remind me we had an audience, and a very interested one at that.
Lowering my voice belatedly, I added, "Sir."
His eyes laughed at me, and the secretive, wicked grin I so loved reappeared on his lips when I made a face at him. "People are going to talk about us tomorrow," I muttered. "I should leave now---"
"No." The laughter was gone from his eyes, replaced by a furious glitter. "Don't go." His hands tightening around my waist, Constantijin muttered, "We still haven't talked about us."
"Constantijin---"
"I'm sorry I fucked up. I can say it again and again, but it won't change things. Give me another chance and it will be different this time."
I so badly wanted to believe him, but he's already hurt and left me hanging twice. Shaking my head, I mumbled, "I forgive you, Constantijin, but---"
"One more chance, Yanna. That's all I ask."
No, no, no, my head shrilly protested, but it was too late. Constantijin's gotten under my skin again and he's found his way back to my heart. "Just give me time and space to think," I said.
"Fine."
Just when I thought that was all he was going to say – and that was frankly disappointing – Constantijin spoke again. "But I want you to know … it's not just sex between us, Yanna." The music we were swaying to switched tempos, and he suddenly whirled me around. As he did, he said, "You matter to me."
Then he was walking me back to George.
I was literally shell shocked for more than a few minutes, unable to believe that Constantijin Kastein had made such a declaration. From the very first time we met, it had always been sex between us, or at least I thought it had been for him until now.
You matter to me.
Oh my God, oh my God. Constantijin with his overtly sexual magnetism took my breath away, his cock a weapon I was helpless against. But Constantijin actually growing a heart?
"George." I was back to being talkative, and I was dying to tell someone about what had just happened.
George took one look at my smitten expression and started laughing.
I couldn't help laughing, too, my heart still melting at Constantijin's words. It was the very first time he made me feel soft and mushy rather than hot and wet. It was … a good feeling.
"George." It was all I could manage to say.
George patted my hand. "I know, hon, I know."
Constantijin liked me. He cared for me. I was pretty sure of it now.
I turned to George again, intending to share with him what Constantijin's parting words were – so much better than the last time, weren't they? Instead I found myself staring at Mr. Fix It instead. I mean, Drake. Dear Lord, I had to stop thinking of him as the guy who fixed my problems. Because he couldn't be that. In the future, it would be Constantijin who would be fixing my problems since he liked me, cared for me, was in lo---
Bad Yanna, bad Yanna. Stop jumping to conclusions.
"Care to dance, Ms. Everleigh?"
Without thinking, I looked over my shoulder, searching for a pair of silvery eyes. In a little while, I found Constantijin's wry gaze taking the situation in.
I let out a sigh of relief, amazed that he wasn't going berserk.
My phone beeped.
Heart racing, knowing who it was from even before I saw Constantijin's name on my screen, I clicked his message open.
Don't think I'm not jealous. I am. Too fucking much.
The words made me smile, my toes curl, and my face heat up.
Ah. Constantijin and his rudely romantic words – what did it say about me that I couldn't get enough of his unique way of showing I, umm, mattered?
Drake offered his hand. "Shall we?"
Taking it, I laughed when he immediately whisked me to the dance floor with a little twirl. I had a great time dancing with him – and any number of other men. There wasn't a moment I had to myself, with one guy after another asking to dance with me. And I did, with all of them.
They flattered me outrageously and asked for my number. I felt like the belle of the ball, but even I knew it wasn't because I was the prettiest girl in the room. It was because they thought Constantijin Kastein was interested in me – and I had rebuffed him. That got my "market value" rise pretty high in the men's eyes.
Constantijin wasn't doing anything to stop the speculations, standing next to his mother throughout the evening, never dancing with anyone else.
An hour later, my phone beeped again and I couldn't get it out fast enough.
Dance with me again?
Smiling, I typed my reply.
No.
Let me see what you could say to that, I thought, almost humming to myself. A waiter offered me champagne and though I normally didn't drink any kind of liquor, I found myself accepting a flute.
My phone beeped just as I was lifting the glass to my lips.
Have sex with me?
I choked on my champagne.
Lesson #7
Sometimes, you have to make a choice with your billionaire:
To fuck or be fucked up.
It was a Monday again, and I had two snowflakes and a mysterious red-colored Post-It stuck to my LCD screen. By now, I had totally given up beating Charli to work. I had even arrived an hour earlier than my call time one day but lo and behold, Charli was already sipping her cappuccino in her office by the time I rushed in.
The first sticky note was a congratulatory message. Or at least I assumed it was since 70% of it was written in French. One day, I really had to tell Charli that my multilingual skills didn't exactly extend to her native tongue.
The second snowflake had me gulping.
Do you think smutty manga set in high school will be accepted by American TV audience?
Explain and present. Due Friday.
Just my luck to get this question … this would have been so much more suitable for Arian, who had no qualms talking about anything sexual in public. In last Friday's event, I totally heard her ask Constantijin very innocently if he thought her breasts were too huge.
Yeah. I know. I totally wanted to puke after that.
Staring at Charli's troubling sticky note, I mulled over my choices. God, smut in high school was, like, so difficult to tackle. If you thought bedroom and smutty scenes in Gossip Girls or Vampire Diaries were hot, wait until you read shoujo manga by, say, Kanan Minami. That girl totally redefined high school sex.