With a minute frown, she said, “Me.”
“What else?”
“Nothing.”
He shook his head. “Look at your face. Look into your eyes. What do you see?”
If he was going for the abstract, she was about to get ticked. The last thing she wanted was some question and answer in-her-heart BS about what he actually saw in her. And if he made her cry, she was going to be super pissed. “I see a woman who gives…and gives.” There. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.
He surprised her with a wide grin and sparkling eyes. “There she is!” Evidently he liked that she’d shown some spirit. He wasn’t just trying to bolster her spirits with some “in her heart” mumbo jumbo. “What else?”
Biting her lip, she gazed into her own eyes. “Compassion.”
“A ton of that stuff. Yes. Go on.” He caressed one shoulder as he leaned down and pressed a very warm kiss to the other and looked up at her, the plea in his eyes for her to see what he did, perhaps. He slid a hand down her arm, scattering a wave of tingles in its wake. He laced his fingers with hers, giving them a slight squeeze, and she looked back up at her reflection. She wanted him to put his hands on her body, and looking into her eyes, she thought he must be able to see it in her eyes, too. “Love.”
He nodded. “And desire?”
“Yes,” she whispered.
“What about her? Cassie. Is she desirable?”
In the dim lamplight, the woman in the mirror was more relaxed, ready to be loved, and she nodded. “Yes.”
“Deserving of love?”
She’d given a lot over the years, to many people—some whom she knew loved her, like her kids, and to others who had just used her for their own ends. And she’d loved them and given of herself, only to be left hanging. How might it have been if what they were embarking on, a ménage a trois, had been more accepted thirty years ago? No one could answer that, but she could answer it now. Her brown eyes caught the light, and she whispered, “I deserve love, too.”
He lifted her hand clasped in his, wrapped his arm around her shoulders, and wrapped the other around her waist.
“Excellent. Now listen to me. You deserve love. I want to give it in all forms, and you denying that I would want to love on any and every part of you is the same thing as saying what I want is foolish…or, worse, that I’m lying. Am I lying?” His arms tightened fractionally.
She shook her head, heart leaping at his sharper tone. “No, you’re not lying. I don’t want you to feel obligated.”
“Make me feel obligated, love. I want you to.” There was no light of humor in his eyes. He was serious.
“Ivan?”
“Mmm?” he asked as he closed his eyes and tightened his hold on her, grounding her.
“I want you to do everything you said earlier to me, and more. I want you to make love to me. I want you to spend the night. I want you very much, however you want me.”
His lips widened into a grin, and she gasped when he opened his mouth on the juncture between her shoulder and throat and licked her. Then she felt the grip of his teeth on the skin there and heard a rumbly growl. He sucked for a moment and then released her to whisper, “I’m going to eat you alive.”
She was struck speechless as he spun her and lifted her in his arms and laid her on the bed.
“Uh…um…”
“What?” he asked, sounding a little breathless as he unbuckled his belt and released the button on his slacks.
She gulped as she watched him and then said, “I’ve never been to bed with anyone besides Bill. Um, I don’t know if you want them or not, but I have condoms and stuff in…in that drawer,” she said, indicating the dresser by the bed. Considering the circles she ran in, she should be better versed in how to sex it up.
“And stuff?” he asked nonchalantly as he removed his shoes and then went over to the dresser and pulled out the crinkly bag containing all her illicit supermarket purchases.
“Yes,” she responded, trying to be brave. “I didn’t have any and wasn’t sure if you’d want them or not or if maybe we should use them if, you know, if you had…well, anyway, there’s also other stuff in there. Lube. I didn’t have any, and there’s also a little thinger…”
“A ‘thinger’?” he asked with a grin and upraised brow. “You wouldn’t by chance mean this sex toy, now would you?” he asked as he lifted it out of the bag. “Do you have many of these?”
She shook her head as he brought the whole bag to the bed. Holding up the box of condoms, he said, “It’s been a while since I’ve had sex—quite a while. But if you’d prefer I use one for your sake, I don’t mind. Same goes for the lube.” He held up the container of coconut oil and sexily arched a brow. “I plan to make you so hot and wet you won’t need this but we’re using it anyway because I understand what you’re telling me.”