I walked over and stood barely a foot in front of him.
“About four months before my eighteenth birthday, my door opened in the middle of the night. Rex came in and demanded that I strip and bend over the bed for him. According to him, my mom’s ‘pussy was too loose’ and he thought because he had taken care of me all of those years that I needed to pay him back. Forget the fact that I was a minor. When I refused, he left, promising to be back.”
A sense of déjà vu washed over me, but I ignored it. No way would Ray come back. “And he did, a few weeks later. This time he tried to ‘help’ me remove my clothes. I screamed and Mom came running into the room. Sick thing was, I felt relieved. Finally, she’d see what kind of man he was, what she was married to. But it was short lived. She blamed me. Me!” My eyes burned from holding back the tears.
“So I left. And I vowed I would never owe anyone anything. I’ve taken care of myself ever since.”
Miller walked over and wrapped me in his arms. I slumped against him and took the comfort he offered. It felt good to let the tears go. Even if I was mad at him for forcing the issue, his strong arms gave me a sense of peace I hadn’t felt since I was sixteen. I’d never told that story to anyone. Not Ray, not my classmates—no one.
“That wasn’t your fault,” he said, stroking a hand down my back.
I looked up at him. The hatred buried in the depths of his eyes gave me a brief moments pause. I knew it wasn’t directed at me, but I’d seen Miller in action before and he wasn’t pissed off then. I couldn’t begin to imagine what he could do to someone when emotions were involved.
“I know that, but can you at least understand why I refuse to let myself be vulnerable again. To take things and feel like it needs to be reciprocated.”
Deep down I knew that I was contradicting myself because by sharing this with Miller, I was making myself vulnerable. Showing any kind of weakness was never a good thing. But even as I cried against him, I couldn’t bring myself to feel weak. Miller would never use this against me. Of that I was sure.
CHAPTER 19
Miller
Find them.
The urge to murder someone or break something was overwhelming. The first moment I got, I would be sending a text to Dean. I was going to track down her parents and set them straight about how they should have treated their daughter. I’d never put my hands on a woman before, but there was a first time for everything.
“I understand, but you have to know that this is me offering it freely. You would never owe me anything.” I sighed before adding, “I’ll drop it, just promise me one thing, if you ever need or want the money, you’ll tell me.”
“I promise.”
I knew she was only saying the words to appease me but, for the moment, they did. That fucking family of hers consumed all of my thoughts so there wasn’t room for me to dwell on her dodging me, yet again.
“You head home. I’ll bring dinner by later.”
“Fine.” She straightened herself and stepped out of my arms.
It was likely that she was annoyed that I ordered instead of asked, but I needed her to leave before I said something that would push her away completely. As soon as the door closed behind her I picked up my phone to call Dean.
“Miller.”
“I need a favor.”
He laughed. “What’s new? This have anything to do with that sexy goddess you’re fucking?”
“You’re lucky you’re my friend because right now I want to reach through the phone and rip out your vocal cords.”
“What the fuck has you all fired up?”
“Tess is mine.”
“No shit, tell me something I don’t already know. You’re being a dick so something must have set you off. What is it?”
I explained everything I’d learned about Tess and her parents. Dean was as disgusted as I was and agreed to help find them. I asked him to let me know when he located them, knowing that whatever I needed to do was something that would require a certain amount of planning.
Setting the ball into motion helped me to calm down as much as I could in that circumstance. The rest of it would take time. We hung up and the next call I made was to Ashton. I had some groveling to do.
“Hello?”
“I fucked up.”
“How badly?” You could hear the mix of amusement and annoyance in his voice.
“Nothing I can’t fix. But I need help.”
“Not until you tell me what you did. Then I can decide if you deserve help.”
I slumped into the seat behind my desk and explained the whole story again, including that I already had Dean looking for her parents.