Hot as Puck(28)

Christ, I’m fucking hopeless.

“I care about you so much. I hope you know that,” Libby says, her words sending a cool sliver of fear cutting through my arousal.

Shit, is Libby about to confess that she has a thing for me? And if so, what the hell am I going to do about it? The last thing I want is to hurt her, but my cock is the only part of me invested in getting her naked. I love her, but I don’t love her in that way. She’s my sweet friend who I also want to fuck until we’re both coming so hard we can’t see. That’s it.

“You are so important to me,” she continues, anxiety tightening the skin around her soft brown eyes. “But yesterday wasn’t… I mean it felt amazing, and I’ve never been so comfortable with someone in a situation like that, but I…”

I frown, confused again. “Just spit it out, Libs.”

Her breath rushes out. “I’m not interested in you in that way, Jus. I mean, I’m clearly attracted to you, but you’re my friend. And that’s all. And I’m sorry if it seemed like I was leading you on with the sex education thing or trying to turn friendship into something more, but I honestly just wanted—”

She keeps talking, but I can’t make out what she’s saying because I’m laughing too fucking hard. I laugh so hard that after a moment, Libby starts laughing with me.

“What’s so funny, jerk?” She shoves my shoulder playfully. “I’m trying to be nice to you so you won’t get your feelings hurt!”

“I know. It’s nice,” I say, fighting to get the words out.

“So, you’re not secretly in love with me.” She crosses her arms at her chest and glares up at me, but I can tell she’s as relieved as I am.

“No, I’m not.” I pull in a ragged breath, regaining control. “But I appreciate how sweet you are. Thank you for letting me down easy, babes. You’re the best.”

She shoves me again, sending another chuckle rumbling through my chest. “And you’re the worst. What a jerk you are! You’re the one who was calling me beautiful and writing poetry. What was I supposed to think?”

“I get it,” I say, laughter fading. “I totally do. For real. I was actually a little worried that you might want something more than friendship.”

Her shoulders hunch closer to her ears. “No, I don’t. But I am confused. I didn’t think I could feel the kind of things I felt yesterday for a friend.”

I nod, memories of Libby’s expression pre-orgasm making my voice husky when I say, “Yeah, well, that’s why they call it friends with benefits.”

“I’ve never had a friend with benefits.” Her gaze drifts to my lips again, making me think I’m not the only one with sex on the brain.

“I have. It can be nice, as long as both people are on the same page emotionally.” I shift closer, pulling the heavenly smell of her in along with my next breath. “Which, it seems like we are…”

Her chest rises and falls, her heart-stopping breasts straining the fabric of her sweater, making me ache to set them free. “This is not something I’ve even considered until today, Jus. I’ve always been a romantic, but…” She looks up, heat and uncertainty mixing in her eyes. “But I don’t want to be a disaster in the bedroom for the rest of my life. And I’m not sure I’m going to learn what I want to learn any other way.”

“You’re not a disaster,” I promise. “I meant what I said yesterday, Libs. I wanted you. So fucking much. You made me crazy.”

“And then I ran away.” Her teeth trap her bottom lip for a moment before setting it free, making me remember how good it felt to have those teeth raking over my skin. “Because I’m a stress case. But I don’t want to be anymore. I want to be confident and sure of myself and know that I can you-know-what with another person in the room and the world isn’t going to come to an end.”

“You know what?”

“That I can come,” she whispers, her cheeks going pink.

My eyebrows lift sharply. “You’ve never…”

She shakes her head as her gaze drops to where her fingers tangle in her scarf. “No. Brett tried and tried, but it never happened. It got to be such an insurmountable, stressful obstacle that I would just fake it. It was easier than dealing with a frustrated boyfriend and feeling like a failure every time we were together. And with the other men I’ve dated, things never went that far.”

“Shit,” I mutter, the knowledge that she’s been deprived of lover-administered orgasms—and that Brett is probably the only man she’s ever slept with—penetrating the lust fog building between us.