“You don’t know anything,” she snapped.
I frowned. “No, I don’t.”
We were silent again for a moment, and I watched her closely. She seemed to shrink into herself, eyes looking down at the floor. Probably remembering the gun in her face, I thought. The girl had never experienced something like Max, had never even considered that someone would want to end her life. She was right: I didn’t know a thing about what she was feeling. I couldn’t blame her for being angry. Hell, she was taking it better than I had expected.
“I’m sorry,” she said softly.
“For what?”
“You saved my life. I shouldn’t be such a bitch.”
I stared at her for a second, and then I burst out laughing. I had no clue why, but it seemed so fucking funny. It was completely absurd and insane, the whole situation just so beyond fucked that I couldn’t hold it all back. She gave me a confused smile as I rocked back in my chair, laughing loudly.
“What?”
“I don’t know,” I managed to say through gasps of air.
She shook her head, still smiling. “You’re insane.”
I pushed away from the table, slowly gathering myself. I grabbed her plate and carried it over to the sink, but she stood and followed me.
“Let me do it. Go run your errands.”
I paused. “Are you sure?”
She shrugged. “Might as well get it over with.”
I nodded and looked into her eyes, at the worry lines forming around the edges, the stress etched clearly in her skin, and I wanted to reach out, grab her hips again, feel the warmth under her clothes. Instead, I walked out of the room without another word, stopping only to grab my burner phone. I pushed through the front door and walked out into the morning sunshine, cursing as my headache came back with a vengeance. I walked for a while, moving well away from the safe house. I watched the people staring back at me and had the nagging sense that someone was going to pull up in some black SUV and gun me down in the street. I knew that was nuts since I wasn’t even in Mob territory, but still.
When I was far enough away, I pulled my phone from my pants. I looked down at it for a second, some cheap plastic thing I got at a pay-as-you-go store, and flipped it open. I sat down in front of an abandoned house and dialed a number.
“Hello?” Luis answered on the third ring.
“Luis, it’s me.”
“Shit, boss. You okay?”
“I’m fine. Where are you right now?”
There was a pause, and I could hear commotion in the background.
“At the kitchen,” he said.
“What did I fucking tell you?”
“I know but—” he paused again.
What did he fucking do? I thought.
“What’s up, Luis?”
“Colin talked to me. Said I should stay, keep the place running. He said not to worry about you, that he would protect us, that you were fine.”
Of course it was Colin, that rat fuck. I had to relax my grip, afraid I would crush the phone.
Even though I was pissed, I realized that this was perfect for me. I needed Luis to get something from the restaurant for me, anyway. If he was already there, it would be easy.
“Listen, do me a favor.”
“Anything.”
“In my office, there’s a green box with a bunch of files and shit in it. Grab it and put it out in the dumpster.”
“Can’t promise it’ll be there, boss.”
“What do you mean?”
I could practically feel the tension rolling through the radio waves.
“Some guys came in an hour ago and tore through all your shit.”
I cursed and shook my head.
“Look for it anyway. It doesn’t look important, so they probably left it.”
Probably.
“Okay boss, hold on.”
He put the phone down, and I could hear the noise of the kitchen preparing to open for lunch. Pots and pans banged, and I was pretty sure I heard someone cursing in Spanish. My heart was hammering in my chest, worry wracking my spine. If that box was gone, if they had found what I had stashed in there, then I was done. I was dead. There was nothing I had left to bargain with.
We’d have no choice but to run. I had some money. I didn’t know if Ellie would go for it or not, but she’d have no choice. I’d drag her along with me if I had to. Maybe she could return in a few years under a different name. I couldn’t imagine Colm would last that long, anyway.
As I began to plan for the worst, Luis came back.
“I got it,” he said.
Relief flooded through me. “And it’s full?”
“It’s a mess, but it’s full.”
“Put a lid on it and toss it in the dumpster across the street. They might be watching, so make it look real.”