No, she wasn't ashamed they'd made love. They were both consenting adults, but he was the first man she'd ever slept with without being in a relationship. That made her feel slightly uneasy.
But it had been great, and she refused to regret it, but she also didn't want him to think that she would now have all of these expectations of him. How could she? She didn't know a heck of a lot about the guy. As a matter of fact, she didn't even know Tanner's last name.
As she snuck into her apartment, that thought hit her full force. She'd just spent the night in bed with a man whose last name she didn't know. What did that make her?
No. She wasn't going to do this to herself. She couldn't take it back, and even if she could, she didn't want to. It had been nearly three years since she'd made love to a man, years since she'd allowed herself a night of pleasure, passion with no guilt, no shame. She wasn't going to take that away from herself.
After a quick shower, Kyla dressed and then slipped from her apartment. She was late to work at the mall, and she really hoped she didn't lose her job over it. Yes, this was just a temporary job, but the agency she worked for had a lot of temp jobs, and she wanted this to lead to another one. She couldn't blow her chances, even as an elf. She didn't get very many hours with her other position as a part-time waitress.
"Hello, Kyla. Is everything okay?"
Kyla stopped as she ran into Wayne, the security guard who gave her the creeps. She hated feeling that way about anyone at all, especially someone who was there to protect them here, but she just didn't like the guy and she wanted to be as far from him as possible.
"Everything is fine," she said uneasily. "I'm just running late for work." She began moving forward again toward the front door of the building.
"You weren't too frightened last night, were you, with the power outage?"
"Yes. To be honest, it did frighten me, but the power is back on, so there's no more problem." She gave a nervous laugh.
"I checked in on you, but you weren't in your apartment last night."
The way he said this sent chills down her spine. The sooner she could get out of here, the better. "That was very kind of you, Wayne, but there are people here who need to be checked on a lot more than I do."
"I like checking on you. Did I see you in the video feed that you went down to the basement?"
That stopped her in her tracks again, and a shudder passed through her. "Yes. I was trying to see if the breaker could be switched, but it was in bad shape. It seems they must have fixed it sometime between when I was down there and when I got back up."
"You really shouldn't go down there, not without a guard, at least. You never know what you'll find or what can happen. Was someone with you? It was dark, and it was hard to put a face to the people in that feed."
"I wasn't alone, and I agree, that basement isn't a place for anyone to be going down into in the middle of the night. I am running really late, though, so I need to leave," she said, taking another step away.
"Of course. I don't want to make you late." But he grabbed her arm and stopped her. No, she wouldn't say he did it in a threatening way, but it still made an unpleasant shiver travel down her back. "I wanted to ask if you would like to go out sometime?"
His words stopped her in her tracks. That was the last thing she'd been expecting from him. Wasn't it inappropriate to be asking out someone in the building he was guarding? She didn't want to upset him, but she certainly didn't want to go on a date with the fellow.
"I'm … um … actually seeing someone right now," she said. She wasn't, really - yes, she'd just slept with Tanner, but they weren't an item, and she hadn't the least idea whether they would sleep together again, but he was a convenient excuse to get out of what she knew would be an awkward date. "I really do have to go," she told the guard as firmly as she could, and then she pulled her arm from his grip, pushed through the doors, and practically ran from the building, her horror story fully in her mind again. She couldn't even imagine being down in that dark basement with Wayne. Just the thought of it sent a whole new level of terror racing through her body.
She knew the man was most likely harmless, but with the power outages, and her imagination, and her aversion to this particular man, her mind was running a million different scenarios through her mind.
Kyla made it to the mall, and luckily she wasn't too late. No one reamed her out or threatened to call her employer, so she spent the day trying to make children happy. But her mind couldn't help but wander. What had she gotten herself into? It seemed her life was one big roller coaster and she wasn't sure when she was going to be flipped upside down again.