His Private Pleasure(37)

That got a dry laugh out of her. “I don’t think either of us can claim any kind of patience.”

“Then maybe it’s that I’m presuming too much.” He thought she hadn’t understood the depth of what he was feeling, that he’d masked it well behind the need of his body for hers. But he already knew nothing got past her. He shouldn’t have been surprised that this hadn’t, either. “I know it seems too soon,” he said, “but it’s just the way it is. I’m not making any demands. But I won’t lie and tell you I’m not already planning to find a way to keep you here long enough so that when the time comes and Pearl’s done her thing, you won’t even think about leaving.”

She said nothing, simply stared at him, her expression for once unreadable. His heart was pounding, and not just because she felt so damn good and he’d been so damn close to climaxing before he stupidly decided to have this little talk. “You know, I’ve faced down whacked-out perps waving loaded guns, and never felt quite this nervous. Tell me what you’re thinking.”

It was another moment before she spoke. “I’m thinking you should finish what you started, then we’ll talk.”

His body urged him vehemently to take her suggestion and run wild with it. But something told him if he let them drift back to the physical now, an important, maybe life-altering moment would be forever lost. He might get her like this again, but she’d be prepared next time. And the time after that. “That’s exactly what I’m asking you,” he said. “To stick around long enough for us to finish what we’ve started here.”

“You’re really not talking about sex, are you.” She hadn’t made it a question.

He shook his head. “I’m talking about this.” He bent down and kissed her, gently, reverently, then lifted his head just enough to look into her eyes. “I’m falling in love with you, Liza. I think maybe I was the moment you got out of that death trap you call a car. And it’s not about this.” He moved inside her, making her gasp. “Although it’s certainly a side benefit.”

She arched one brow and wrapped her legs more tightly around his waist, lifting her hips, coaxing him deeper, so his body would simply take over, bypass all the cerebral stuff. And she almost succeeded. Almost.

His jaw was strained with the tension of not giving in to what he so badly wanted…and what they both would so thoroughly enjoy. “You want to run every last committee in town, that’s fine,” he growled. “You’re not happy unless you’re running something.” He grunted a little when she simply squeezed her inner muscles, tightening her grip on him by way of agreeing with him. “Very funny.”

She managed to smile up at him, but she was trembling, too.

“But you can’t always be in charge. You need to learn how to take. And I want to be the one who brings you to that place. Where you can let it all go. Trust that I’ll handle it. Handle you. Just let go.” He kissed her again, more urgently this time, and he began to move as well. “Just let it go.” He looked down at her, thrust again, and again. “Come home to me. Let me be that for you.”

She thrashed her head from side to side as he continued to drive her, with his body, with his words, until she screamed, “Yes! Okay, dammit?” She was gasping; his hips were pistoning. “Yes, yes!”

He took her over the edge, not surprised that she took him with her. He collapsed next to her, pulled her against him and tried to remember how to breathe.

Eventually his heart slowed and he felt her own breathing even out. He stroked her hair and wondered if he hadn’t just ruined what might have been a wonderful couple of months by pushing her too hard, too fast.

“Did you really mean it?” she asked softly.

He thought she was dozing, so her quiet question startled him. He continued to fiddle with her hair, concentrating on the drowsy weight of her limbs draped across his, and how right this whole thing felt. “I meant everything I said. Which part are you asking about?”

He started to shift so she could lift her head, but she pressed her cheek firmly to his chest, keeping her gaze averted.

“I’m…my family doesn’t exactly have a good track record when it comes to long-term commitment. In that respect, I don’t fall far from the tree.”

His heart skipped a beat. He willed it to smooth out. “You strike me as a risk taker.”

“In some things.”

“But not with this sort of thing? Then how do you know you won’t be good at it?”

“I’ve…I have no strategy for this. No method of success to copy, no pattern to follow.” She finally lifted her head and looked at him. “What if I can’t figure out how to make it work?”

He smoothed her rumpled curls. “I’m new at this, too. We’ll figure it out together.”

“I’m not an easy person to deal with.”

His grin came naturally. “I think it’s one of the things I enjoy most.”

She snorted. “That’s the recent double orgasm talking.”

“Could be.”

She swatted him on the chest.

He trapped her close with one strong arm. “I can’t claim to have a mind totally unfogged by recent activities, but I do know that I’ve been with women who were simple, easy to get along with, go-with-the-flow types.”

“And?”

“And it was…boring. Or at the very least, not stimulating.”

“And I am?”

“Oh, definitely. And no, I’m not talking about sex this time, either.”

She settled on his chest, propping her chin on her hands. “Well, that will get old, let me tell you.”

He took her face in his hands. “Well, why don’t we just find out for ourselves, okay?”

She frowned. “You’re really serious, aren’t you?”

“Is it so unbelievable that I could fall in love with you? Do you see yourself as unlovable?”

“Yes. I mean, no. I mean…” She sighed. “I don’t know what I mean. I never really looked at it that way. But then, I never thought about permanent, personal type relationships.” She grimaced. “That was half my problem—I never thought about anything personal. I was all-business, all the time.”

“So this wasn’t part of the sabbatical plan, I take it? You want to move on then, see if anything else strikes your fancy? Fills your soul better?”

“It would be smarter to figure out what I wanted before I got to the who I wanted part.”

“Sometimes we don’t get to be in control of that, either.”

She rolled her eyes, then rested her cheek on his chest, looking away once again.

The silence stretched out and he appeased his growing anxiety by toying with her curls, playing with one dark coil, then another. “If you want to go,” he said at length, “then I won’t stop you.” He wove his fingers deeper, urged her to shift and look at him. Only when she had did he add, “But I can’t promise I won’t come after you.”

Her gorgeous eyes widened. “You wouldn’t. You have work here, a life here.”

“I do. But I also know a once in a lifetime deal when I see it. A job is just a job. And Canyon Springs isn’t going anywhere. But you…” He brushed a fingertip down the length of her nose, let it pause on her lower lip, then caressed her chin. “You could be everything.”

“You don’t mean that.”

He grinned. “Try me.”

Liza did sit up then, despite the strong band of muscles binding her to his side. She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and tried like hell to get her mind to stop jumping and focus. Dear Lord, had he really just told her she was the one for him?

It was like a dream come true. Her heart was pounding, urging her to do the happy dance. But how did she make herself believe in it? Sure, she knew he meant what he was saying. But he was in lust, puppy love, early hormonal crush, when everything was sexy and nothing imaginable could go wrong.

He said he’d follow her. And she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t a bit seduced by the thrill of a man wanting her badly enough to fight for her. To pursue her, dog her heels and wear her down until she confessed that, yes, dammit, he was everything she wanted.

Did it really have to be hard? And what exactly did she want him to do to prove this wouldn’t all turn out badly? Sign an agreement?

But this wasn’t a business proposition. It was a heart reaching out. Taking the risk. He couldn’t be that confident. This had to be hard for him, too, right?

“Aren’t you scared?” she blurted out.

“Terrified,” he confirmed solemnly.

She looked over her shoulder. Damn but he looked good, all sprawled and naked in those sheets. This could be yours, every morning and every night. It was like being told you might hold the winning lottery ticket.

But then again, you might be one number off. And lose everything. Because that’s what this was. Winner take all, loser go home with nothing but a broken heart.

“I hate to lose,” she muttered.

“So do I.”

She slid off the bed, but he snagged her wrist, made her turn around. “I don’t expect a life commitment right this very second, you know. In fact, I hadn’t planned on telling you anything about the way I felt.” He smiled that disarming, cocky-but-self-deprecating smile of his. “I was going to wear you down with great sex until you were hooked on it, and pray like hell you’d end up sticking around for more.”