How could he do this to me? He didn't know anything about what we went through, or how much of a toll the illness had already taken on us. This was a callus move, a bold way for him to throw his power down.
I didn't want my family to suffer. To have gone this far only to watch the entire ordeal be for nothing... Could I do that? Could I leave my mother to suffer gravely?
I wasn't really sure I could.
Or would.
“Why? You still haven't answered that. Tell me why you need this. I deserve that, don't you think?”
His lips formed a thin line, eyes wildly searching the ceiling. Scratching his forehead, he leaned onto the island in the center of the kitchen. “You want to know why.” Hegan rolled his thumbs together, scrunching his nose. “Because I don't have a choice. If I don't do this, then I'll lose everything too.”
A softness had emerged over his face. He looked lost, like a small boy in a store looking for his mother. The strength and confidence that had spewed from every inch of him was shrinking.
I could tell he didn't like this anymore than I did. He wouldn't look me straight in the eye. They zigzagged side to side, up and down. His hands rolled together, fingers twining around each other.
Exhaling a labored breath, he slapped the island. “Well, we have a big day today. We're supposed to meet my parents for lunch later. You should go get cleaned up.” Spinning on one heel, Hegan turned and walked out the door in the back of the kitchen. Dipping his head back in, he said, “Oh, and don't mention any of this to them.”
Before I could speak he was gone. Sitting motionless on the floor, ice held tight to my head, I was still in shock. Reliving the entire ordeal and what he expected me to do. I had a decision to make.
Run, run far away and never look back, or do something that could change my parents lives and in the process... My life forever.
There's no way he can be serious. This has to be some type of test or challenge. Right?
If Hegan actually thought he could blackmail me with money to have his baby, then he had to be fucking crazy.
But, if he's serious...
Do I risk my mother's health, her treatment, her life?
My head was spinning wildly with questions and a fucking headache.
I didn't want to see everything my mom had already been through be for nothing. And Gloria, that fucking bitch. She only cared about the money, that's obvious now. If she was willing to pull out, Hegan must be offering her double what I owed her.
I don't know if I can risk this. Gripping the counter, slowly I pulled myself up. The room spun slightly as I shook my head and closed my eyes. Holding tightly on the granite, I followed it to the edge.
I don't think I've ever fainted before. I feel hung over, the room's spinning and a damn truck's driving over my brain.
And now I'm having lunch with his family. This is like something I'd see in a movie, not in real life, not my life.
Using the wall for balance, I made my way back to my room. Get yourself together Noella! You're not weak.
And I never will be.
Closing the door behind me, I slid down the wood. Resting my back against it, my head hung in my lap. I didn't know what to do, or what to think. I had just been slapped with a life changing decision.
Pressing my fingers into my forehead, my mind was a jostled mess. Get yourself together! You have to think clear, figure this shit out.
How stupid was I?
I had sex with him, unprotected, condomless sex. And that's just what he wanted.
Hegan needs a baby, but why? His answer was useless. He seemed to have everything; what was he losing?
Sure, I could have sat there, dwelling on the asshole that just threw a fist in my gut, and his cock in my pussy. But I decided not to.
Pulling myself up, I inhaled a deep breath. I had to relax, get control of myself. Obviously he wasn't letting me go just yet. I wasn't going to let him think he had gotten to me either.
If my mom's care was on the line and her health was in his hands, I had to think things through.
Maybe, just maybe, this could be my answer.
Am I ready for a baby? No.
But what do you do when your own mother needs you?
You do whatever it takes.
Would she want me passing this up? Would she risk her life for me to leave empty handed?
My throat was coated in a sour taste, stomach rolling with nerves and toxic waste. I had to figure this shit out.
One way or another, I knew my mom wasn't going to be the one suffering.
Not by his hands.
Chapter Nine
Hegan
Lunch— with my parents; the thought made me cringe. Ever since my father threw his lawyer's papers down on the table in front of me; I did anything I could to avoid him. The rant of constant reminders about finding the girl, leaving a legacy to our name, it was an unwelcome conversation that seemed to plague any interaction we had.
And I was highly annoyed by his antics. The repetitive nature of his comments, the reminders that if I wanted to keep my portion of the company, my chair at the 'round table,' then I better stop screwing around and focus.