Hearing the sound of giggling, she turned to see Elizabeth's pleasure as Viscount Winsler whispered to her. She looked glorious, touched by a joy that was now foreign to Brianna. Trying to conjure a smile took too much effort, so Brianna turned her attention back to the activity on the street. She heard her mother make a disappointing sound, but she didn't care, for her thoughts had already moved on.
The last time she saw Richard was the horrid day when he stalked into Lord Kirkwood's drawing room in a blaze of fury. At that moment, she realized she loved him. However, her pleasure at the discovery of her love for him all but disappeared when he demanded she change who she was for him. His superior attitude served to remind her why he was marrying her-for the baby.
"Brianna," her mother called out, shaking her head. "Are you not listening? I asked you to accompany me to check on the wedding preparations. Lord Winsler, Lady Elizabeth, please excuse us."
Without a word, Brianna followed her mother out of the room. Since she proved to be an obedient daughter, she knew she would not be scolded for her lack of attention. Her mother had been terrified Richard would rescind his proposal due to the situation with Lord Kirkwood. When he did not, her mother acted as if Brianna could do no wrong.
"I wanted to gracefully give them a moment alone," her mother whispered, standing less than two feet from the open drawing room door. "I believe he is going to propose. Is it not wonderful?"
"I'm very happy for them," Brianna stated, failing to put some life into her voice.
"Are you feeling all right?"
"I'm fine."
"Perhaps you need some fresh air. Your wedding is tomorrow, and I would prefer you act more like yourself for it. You and Ashley should take Grace for a walk through Hyde Park."
"Yes, Mother," Brianna obediently agreed before making her way upstairs.
Both Ashley and Grace were delighted at the prospect of getting out of the house. Within minutes they were walking in the sunshine with the happy couples. As they continued on, Brianna allowed the fresh air to permeate her body. She tried to look upon the world with her artist's eye as she had done many times before. Although her corner seemed bleak at times, the world was a beautiful place. Everywhere she looked, she witnessed it in nature or in the early stages of love.
Once in the park, she studied the couples and was surprised to see Sarah and Mr. Gregory. They were smiling up at each other, their feelings proudly displayed for all to see. Brianna smiled, pleased she was able to aid them in finding one another.
Jillian was also there, flirting with two different gentlemen. Both men appeared to be in awe of her, and she seemed to genuinely appreciate the attention. Everywhere Brianna looked, she noticed people enjoying themselves, and their joy helped to decrease her misery.
"Lady Brianna, is that you?" a familiar voice asked. Turning, she saw Lord Jonathan almost upon her. She still could not believe Richard had used the technicality of his lack of title to introduce them.
"Lord Jonathan, it's nice to see you again." She smiled weakly.
"Would you care for a stroll?" He held his arm out for her as if certain she would accept.
"I would be delighted," she answered, then turned to Ashley. "I'll catch up with you two shortly."
Taking Lord Jonathan's arm, she allowed him to lead her away from Ashley and Grace. Despite her assurance, she saw the two of them slowly trailing behind. Ashley obviously didn't trust Lord Jonathan.
"I thought women were supposed to be full of excitement and joy the day before their wedding." Lord Jonathan's eyebrows raised, the light of challenge twinkling in his eyes.
"I'm very excited, my lord." Brianna infused her words with as much feeling as she could muster. His responding laugher filled his face with pure merriment.
"I can see that. I only hope you will be able to bring a similar amount of exuberance to the ceremony tomorrow."
His sarcasm made her drop her head in defeat. Although she hated to admit it, he was right. It would not do well for her reputation or Richard's if she appeared tomorrow in this state of mind. The trouble being she had no idea how to lift her spirits or at least give off a positive impression.
"I will," she promised more to herself than to him.
"Richard would never forgive himself if he knew."
"Knew what?"
"That he extinguished your fire," he stated, stopping and turning toward her. "Why did you let him do this to you?"
"What makes you believe Lord Stonemede contributed to my current temperament?"
"Considering the blessed event will occur tomorrow, I don't imagine any other person would be capable of dampening your spirits today."
Brianna turned away, and they resumed walking, this time in silence. His words brought out an odd feeling inside of her. It was as if her repressed emotions began to rise to the surface again. She wondered if her mind automatically responded to the spark of life radiating out of him.
"I don't know what I'm supposed to do," she admitted.
He smiled down at her, eyes alit with optimism. "You are a beautiful woman who exudes life and knows what she wants. Based on what I have heard of you, you don't back down from anything, and don't allow other's dictates to deter you. Richard and his rules are no different than the rest. You must fight back."
Brianna desperately wanted to believe those things of herself. At one time she would have agreed with him, but as he pointed out, some of her fire left. Even if she could fight back, she could not win. Richard didn't love her and therefore would not feel compelled to give in to her demands. Today was her last day of freedom, for tomorrow would bring a whole new set of rules and responsibilities.
"Rebelling against him would not be well received. I have come to understand he is looking for a silent and obedient wife."
"If you believe that, then I must ask. Have you exhibited those qualities to him during your courtship?"
"Not in abundance," Brianna reluctantly confessed.
"Then remember, he chose you. When he made the decision, he already knew what he was getting with you. I would recommend you act no different than you always have."
"Thank you, my lord. I shall try to remember that in the future," she said, offering him the most genuine smile she managed in almost a fortnight. His words gave her hope, and she felt more like herself once again.
After bidding Lord Jonathan a good day, the three girls started back to Denton House. The entire way all Grace could speak about were the handsome gentlemen she had seen. Ashley was biting her lower lip and watching Grace closely. Although understanding Ashley's concern, Brianna ignored them and kept her opinions to herself. She had too much on her mind to worry about Grace's future now, and she sincerely hoped to gain some quiet time to think once they were home.
Upon their arrival at the house, they were met at the door by a very enthusiastic mother, boasting a smug smile. Brianna's heart sank. Quiet time was the last thing she would receive.
Her mother explained that Lord Winsler had proposed to Elizabeth and she had accepted. Since Elizabeth was under their supervision in London, her mother was taking credit for the proposal. In order to celebrate the engagement, Lord Winsler had been invited to dine with them this evening.
Hours later, after a very boring dinner, Brianna shifted in her chair. How could she be expected to remain with the party? She simply couldn't stand staying here any longer. She had attempted to excuse herself, but her mother denied her request. Although she wanted to be there for her friend, she already exceeded the amount of time she could handle. She would feign illness and retire to her chamber. Just as she was about to rise, Elizabeth sat down beside her.
"Is Lord Winsler not the most wonderful gentleman?" Elizabeth asked.
"He does appear to be a pleasant man. I must offer my congratulations again. I'm truly happy for you."
"Thank you. When I originally asked to join you in London, I never imagined I would become betrothed, especially so quickly."
"You should not sound so surprised. Not only are you a beauty, but securing a husband was the reason you chose to accompany us."
"Yes, of course," Elizabeth stammered, shifting uncomfortably and avoiding eye contact.
"Elizabeth." Brianna narrowed her eyes. "Is there something you are not telling me?"
"What do you mean?"
"You are hiding something from me."
"Well, I suppose since everything turned out according to plan, there is no harm in telling you now."
"In telling me what exactly?" Brianna could see Elizabeth's reluctance, but she would not back down until she discovered the information her friend was hiding.
"My desire to come to London with you didn't only come from a need for entertainment or finding a husband. I came to assist Richard with his pursuit of you."