I reached for her hand when I caught up, but she kept walking.
"I mean it. I don't need your help, Hawk. I don't need anything from you. Not a goddamn thing." She broke out of my grasp and continued walking down the sidewalk.
"Dammit, Morgan, we have to talk!"
"Oh, that's rich coming from you," she spat, yanking out of my hold again and turning down a side street.
"Jesus, I'm going to need to start training every day again if I'm going to keep up with you."
Her hand thrust behind her, middle finger in the air, long hair flowing in a curtain around her. A hint of that sarcastic smile I loved so much darted across her lips before she schooled her expression again.
She was still the girl I knew, the girl I loved.
"First, you steal Gram's mac and cheese recipe, then you flip me the bird? On fire, aren't ya?" I shot back. "Christ, Morgan, just give me a minute." I finally caught her.
"I gave you a lot just now, and still, you managed to insult me." She shook her head, jaw clenching and unclenching.
"Fuck, you're right." I pushed a hand through my hair. "I'm sorry. I've been driving myself insane … " I looked up at the stars sprinkled in the inky sky, one thought chugging through my brain on repeat. "I was a fucking dumbass not to think of it the moment I saw you … and her … Morgan." I caught her gaze, voice lowering another octave as emotion clogged my throat. "Is she mine?"
Chapter 5
Morgan
Angry tears pricked behind my eyelids as I thought about all the time that'd gone by.
I didn't owe him an explanation. He didn't even deserve to come along one day and ask me this question.
If he'd really cared, wouldn't he have been back the first month? Calling the first week? Writing letters? Anything?
The truth was, he'd done nothing.
Absolutely nothing. Just walked away and forgot about the life he'd made here.
Had I asked him to do that? Sure. Does that mean he should have?
No. God, no.
So I didn't feel like I owed him that answer. But then our eyes caught, unspoken words hanging heavy between us.
Memories. Emotions. Love.
I hated that I still loved him too.
I hated him and I loved him, and those were two completely different emotions waging a brutal war in my gut.
But in the end, the girl that loved him won out.
The girl that remembered the way he used to catch me when I fell made the decision.
"Come inside?" I asked, catching his hand with mine, the first tender moment I'd felt toward him in so long. Earlier we'd fucked, but this, this was penetrating my soul on another level. This deserved more, and so did he.
I owed him more.
"In?" he asked, hand covering mine in that old familiar way it used to.
"This is my place." I nodded behind me, an old Victorian walk-up, dilapidated shutters and rotten railings greeting his gaze.
"What about … ?"
"It's fine." I shrugged it off. "Mrs. Frisk won't mind. I'm a grown woman."
I walked ahead of him up the stairs, never imagining we'd have this moment together. Never imagining I would ever see him again, much less welcome him into my home. Into my family.
"Em's been asleep for over an hour, and I left some fried chicken in the fridge for you- Oh." Mrs. Frisk paused when her eyes landed on me and then my visitor. "Hawk? Is that you?"
"Sure is, ma'am."
"Good God, it's been a while." She placed a kiss on his cheek. "Just visiting before you're back to the city?"
"No, ma'am. Here to stay. Bought a house outside of the town line."
"Oh." Mrs. Frisk looked from me to Hawk, then made a big show of gathering up her purse and knitting and scuttling out the door. "I'll leave you two alone, then."
"Thank you, Mrs. Frisk." I winked at her, closing the door as she descended the steps.
"She hasn't changed a bit, still matchmaking and gossiping."
"Same as ever." I paused, taking him in. He was gorgeous, still young, still so … unlike me. Was he unlike me? Had we drifted too far apart? I was a mom now, and that would forever and always come first. Was he ready for that?
I couldn't think of a thing to say to him. So instead, I pulled out the photo album from the rickety bookshelf, the one stuffed full of all of Emerson's firsts. First smile, first step, first haircut-it was her life, condensed into a book of shiny pages.
I sat down on the couch, patting the seat next to me, and placed the book in his lap once he sat. "First, please know that I never thought I would see you again."
His eyes hardened in the dim light, hand moving mine away so he could open the book.
Emerson Riley Larson – Born August 21
Hawk gnashed down on his teeth, eyes trailing over the words again and again.
"Larson?" he finally breathed.
I nodded, unable to keep the lump from forming in my throat.
"She's mine? That little girl in there is mine, and you never told me? She has my last name, and yet she doesn't even call me Dad?" He stared me down.
My stomach turned to acid, the urge to throw up powerful. "I didn't know what to do. I knew I couldn't ruin your life, Hawk. I knew the only dream you had was to get out of this town and play pro ball. I couldn't let us stop you."
"Us? Us. Jesus, Morgan, you knew? You knew you were pregnant when you broke up with me?" The hard edge to his words turned my heart to ice.
"Y-yes, but-"
His face twisted then, that charming grin I loved long gone in favor of an angry scowl, something so dark I'd never seen in him before. "You destroyed me!" He shot to his feet. "You were my entire heart! And then you broke it. You broke me, and now you tell me you fucking lied? You kept my baby from me? A child who has my blood running through her veins? My last name?"
I followed him as he stalked out the door and onto the porch. Hands thrust in his hair, he paced up and down my yard, only grunts and huffs coming from his mouth. "I tried to do what was best. I loved you, I couldn't hold you back."
He turned then, striding toward me before stopping at my feet and plunging his hands into my hair, eyes steering mine as he growled. "That wasn't for you to decide."
My heart beat painfully against my ribs. "I loved you too much to stop you."
"You let me think we were over. That I'd ruined your life. That you hated me." His eyes were tortured.
"I had to, or you wouldn't leave!" I finally succumbed to the pain throbbing in my heart and fell to my knees. I pushed my hands into my hair and sobbed. "I'm so sorry. I thought I was doing the right thing, and now … I don't know. I don't know."
He dropped to his knees beside me, hands holding my cheeks and pulling my gaze to meet his.
"I was never good enough for you, Hawk. You came from something, you are going places. A girl like me only holds a guy like you back, and I couldn't live with myself if I'd-"
"Shut up. Fuck, woman, please just shut up." He covered my lips in a soft kiss. Kissing me slowly, he slid his tongue in and out, tasting me like he was savoring me. "I don't know what the fuck I'm going to do with you," he murmured, nose circling the shell of my ear. "But I want to get to know my daughter."
I hunched there stock-still, frozen in his arms as the realization there was no going back took over me.
Hawk knew now.
Hawk knew Emerson was his, and now I would have to split custody, share my daughter, make decisions for her with him.
With him.
Oh God, what had I done?
Chapter 6
Hawk
She was mine.
I couldn't fucking believe it. After all these years, all this time, my girl had a little girl, my little girl.
"We're gonna have to get your stuff moved out of here tomorrow," I muttered, brain suddenly swirling with all the shit I had to do.
"Excuse me, what?" She looked up at me, eyes still wet with salty tears.
"Not leaving you and my little girl in this place. Not when there's something I can do about it."
"Hawk, we don't need you to do anything. Between my mom and Mrs. Frisk and me, we're getting along just fine with Emerson."
"My girl deserves a fuck of a lot more than just fine." I cupped her cheek, smoothing the pad of my thumb across her cheek. "Both of my girls do."
She tightened her jaw, standing up and brushing herself off. "Listen, Hawk Larson, I don't need your handout. I don't need anything from you."
"You need a daddy for that little girl," I said plainly.
The words must have hit their mark because Morgan narrowed her eyes. "Don't start. You can see Emerson. You're welcome to come over for dinners and school functions, but-"
"But my ass, Morgan." I pulled her close to me, chest to chest, breath to breath. "I want all the fucking dinners with that little girl, and I want them with you too. Don't bother tellin' me you mind sharing a dinner with me because the way you just screamed my name back at my place proves otherwise. I can still make you come, Morgan. My skin against yours makes you mine. This-" I hammered my cock against her pelvis, making sure she felt every hard inch "-this belongs to you."