His Forever Family(31)

"Yes? Oh, Ms. Reese!" Hazel's large eyes looked up at her through her  thick glasses. "I wasn't expecting you or Mr. Warren today." She peered  around Liberty, looking for Marcus.

"Actually, he's not here," Liberty said. There. She'd managed to keep her voice surprisingly level. She could do this.

"Oh." Hazel gave her an odd look, but Liberty ignored it.

"May I see William?"

"Of course, dear. Come in. Mind the door."

Liberty entered and followed Hazel up the steps. Tomorrow, she was  going to go into Marcus's office after hours, when she knew he wouldn't  be there, and clean out her desk. Then she was going to start applying  for jobs. She wasn't even going to bother contacting Erik Jenner. That  was too close to Marcus.

She was unemployed and starting over from scratch for the second time  in her life. Which had led her to one unavoidable conclusion-this would  be her last visit with William. She couldn't afford to let herself get  any more attached to the child than she already was because she could  not afford the child and if she did get a job, she didn't know where  she'd wind up. It'd be for the best if she weren't in Chicago anymore.  Too many versions of her past here.

"...Ms. Reese?"

Liberty shook herself out of her thoughts. Hazel was standing just  inside the nursery, a look of concern on her face. "I'm sorry?"

"I asked if everything was all right." She peered at Liberty with owlish eyes. "With you and Mr. Warren."

Oh. That. "I don't..." But her words trailed off as she saw William  rocking in the brand-new swinging chair that Marcus had bought just for  him, and her chest felt as if it was going to collapse back into itself.  The whole room was a giant reminder of how very much Marcus had  cared-for William, for her.

This was going to hurt more than she'd thought it would.

She understood that he felt betrayed. She couldn't blame him for that.  But what stung even more was that he'd promised to fight for her-and he  hadn't. It hadn't mattered how valuable she'd made herself and it hadn't  mattered how much she truly cared for him. All that had mattered was  that she hadn't fully disclosed the most painful parts of her life.

"I don't think that Mr. Warren and I will be able to apply to adopt  William," she said, plucking the infant out of the swing. William made a  small mewling noise as Liberty tucked him against her chest. His tiny  body was so warm, so fragile.

"Dear, I'm so sorry to hear that. You two... I had hoped..." Hazel's voice trailed off.

Yeah, they'd all hoped. Liberty sat down and stared at William's face,  trying to commit every last detail to memory. She'd come so close to  being able to hold on to this child-to being able to hold on to Liberty  Reese. But she'd flown too close to the sun and what went up had to come  back down. "I came to say goodbye." She said it more to the baby than  to Hazel.

William blinked up at her, his tiny little mouth stretching out. She  desperately wanted to think that he knew her now, that the sound of her  voice or the smell of her skin was familiar to him. That, somehow, he'd  remember there once had been a woman who loved him so much that she'd  risked her safe, comfortable life for him.

And Marcus said she never risked anything.

"Will you take our picture together?" she asked, shifting to retrieve  her phone. The company phone, with all the company communication on it.  She'd have to bite the bullet and get her own phone after this. She  couldn't keep Marcus's property. And the dresses-those would have to go  back, too. Part of her wanted to return them herself or sell them-that  money could carry her for months while she hit the job market.                       
       
           



       

But that would be another level of dishonesty. Marcus would assume that  she'd been with him only for the money. As much as she was worried  about her financial future, she couldn't bring herself to lower his  opinion of her any more.

Hazel cleared her throat and took the phone. With some fussing, she  managed to take a few pictures. "You belong together," she said, handing  the phone back.

"I know." It was only after she'd said it that Liberty realized she  didn't know whom Hazel was referring to-Liberty and William? Or Liberty  and Marcus?

"Dear," Hazel began delicately. "It might be best-for the baby-if you kept visiting for as long as you're able."

"Really?" Oh, how Liberty wanted to believe that. But was Hazel telling her what she thought she needed to hear?

"Oh, yes. He knows you, you know. And he's still settling in after that  rough start..." Hazel looked at her hopefully. "I know it can't be a  permanent thing. When you're a foster mother, everything is in a  constant state of change. Babies come and go, and all I can do is try to  give them the best start I can. He's already lost his mother. They  haven't found her, you know. I don't think it'd be good for the little  angel to lose you so soon, too."

Liberty's throat started to close up. "I'm-" She had to pause and take a  breath. "I'm going to be looking for a new job. I might have to move  soon."

"I understand. But even for a few more weeks..." She looked at William  and smiled. "They know when they're loved. Trust me, it makes such a  difference later on."

Wasn't that the thing that had saved her? Grandma Devlin had loved her.  She'd never been able to take Liberty in, but knowing the older woman  was right down the hall with a cookie and a story and a hug-that she'd  be there when Liberty left the foster homes-that was what had kept  Liberty going throughout a hellacious childhood.

"All right," Liberty agreed, trying her hardest not to sob and doing a lousy job of it. "If you say so."

Hazel made satisfied noises and bustled off to get William a bottle.  When Liberty and the baby were alone, she leaned down and whispered, "I  love you, William. I always will."

He sighed against her cheek.

And Liberty let herself cry.

* * *

Marcus waited at the office the next day and the day after that, but  Liberty did not show up. He took that to mean that she didn't intend to  come back to work. Fine. Great. He needed a new assistant and that was  inconvenient, but whatever. He'd work around it.

This did not explain why he left explicit instructions with the  security guards to call him the moment she came back. She'd left all of  her things, after all. She'd be back. And when she did finally show  up...

Well, he'd know about it.

He didn't want to speak to her again. But when his phone rang at nine  fifteen at night and Lester the security guard was on the other end,  telling him that Liberty had entered the building, Marcus still hurried  down to his car and took off for the office.

As he drove, he wondered what the hell he was doing. He didn't need to  confront her. He'd pretty much said what he needed to say. He was  just...making sure she didn't walk off with office supplies or change  all the passwords out of spite. That was all.

She wasn't there. "You just missed her," Lester said, sounding sympathetic.

Marcus noticed that the older man wasn't meeting his gaze. "Is that a fact?"

"Yes, sir," Lester said. He had nothing else to add.

Marcus went up to the office anyway-just to be sure. Liberty's shower  supplies were missing from the bathroom. Her area was as neat as a pin,  as always-but the drawers were empty. He checked.

She was just...gone. It was almost as if she'd never even existed.

Then he saw it-her company phone sat on the corner of his desk and  underneath it was a small white envelope with Marcus written in  Liberty's neat hand across the front.

He didn't want to read it.

But that's exactly what he did.

Marcus,

I will never forgive myself for the pain I have caused you. This was  never my plan. I didn't want things to change because I thought I had  everything I needed. I was wrong about that, too.

I think it's best for me to move on. I won't take the job with Jenner, so you won't have to worry about explaining anything.

Please don't hold any of this against William. None of this was his  doing. I just wanted something better for him than what I had.

I hope you figure out what you want and you fight for that. Not for me,  not for your parents-for you, Marcus. If there's one thing life has  taught me, it's that you have to save yourself. No one else is going to  do it for you.                       
       
           



       

Thank you for everything. The last three years have been a gift I don't deserve.

Love,

Liberty

He picked up her phone. He didn't know why he remembered her password and he didn't know why he entered it.

The phone didn't open up on the home screen. Instead, it opened up on  the last app that had been used, and Marcus wasn't ready for what he  saw.