His Alone(36)

"Kitten, maybe I should take you to the doctor," I say, putting the back of my hand on her forehead to see if she has a fever. She doesn't feel warm, but this isn't like her. I don't like this shit, and something about it is eating me. It feels off, and I always trust my gut.

She glances around and then back at me, knocking my hand away more forcefully than I expect. The motion burns deep in my gut. The playfulness slips away even more. She's slipping away. I can feel it. Usually when she bats me away, it's a halfhearted attempt. Almost an invitation to keep touching her. But that felt different. "To put it bluntly, I started my period today. I get really bad headaches and cramps, so if you don't mind I'd like to be alone tonight."

Her statement surprises me. I didn't expect her to say it, but it's not like she's got the plague. I don't know what most guys' reactions would be, but I don't care. It's just a period. Every other person on the planet has one. It's not like she's going to give it to me, and if I'm with her I can take care of her. Get her anything she might need.

"Look, let's go home and I can rub your feet and you can rest. I'll make us dinner." I'm already thinking about what I can do to make her better. Maybe she's irritable and needs to eat. That happens more than not. I can Google what helps with that time-of-the-month shit. I'm sure there is something I can do for her.

She looks annoyed and shakes her head as if shaking away the idea. "No, I'd rather be alone. I'll see you in the morning." Her words are final, and I'm shocked, pissed even, as I watch her stack those blocks back up around her. She thinks they're going to stay, but I won't let them. 

"Hey." I grab her arm, but she jerks it out of my grip. What's happening? Why is she being so aggressive? She's pissed, that much is clear. I can see it in the tight lines of her body. She's rigid, almost breakable.

"Seriously, Ryan. I'm fine. Give me some space tonight. Is that so much to ask?"

The fact that she used my real name makes me take a step back. I don't appreciate her tone, or her insinuation that my being with her is somehow an inconvenience. "I wanted to make sure you were all right. I can see you have that under control." It takes everything in me to force those words past my lips.

This is about her father. She has that same look on her face she had that night at the party. I take a deep breath to calm myself. I need to give her a little space. A little time to breathe, but not much. She isn't walking this road alone, as much as she wants to, or at least thinks she wants to.

She grabs her messenger bag and avoids eye contact. "I'm fine. I'm not feeling great today, and I'd appreciate a night off."

"Absolutely." The word comes out cold, but she doesn't react. I clench my fists at my sides so I don't reach out and grab her and pull her to me.

I try to give her what she's asking for, even though I think the reason is bullshit. There's something else there, but with Paige, I can't push her. Not yet, anyway. I need to figure out what's happened. What's changed in the last few hours. My mind runs through everything that's gone throughout the day and nothing comes to mind.

We walk out of the building together, and I make sure she gets home safe. When she says goodbye to me at her door, I throw my hands out and let it go. Obviously, she isn't ready to talk about what's really going on.

I take the stairs down one floor to my apartment right below hers. I let myself in, dropping my keys by the door, and walk to the living room. It's sparse and cold in my place, and suddenly I hate every inch of it. Mostly because it doesn't have Paige in it.

I flip on the TV that shows the feed from all the cameras in the building. I pull up the one that's on her door. I sit on my couch, wondering if she's okay and trying to think of what the hell happened after we got to work. I lie back and look up at the ceiling. We're separated by only a few feet, but for some reason it feels like we're miles apart.

That's okay, kitten. I'll let you push for a minute, but I'm coming for you.





Chapter Seventeen



Paige









"HEY, I'M HERE. What's going on?"

I grab Mallory and pull her into the apartment, closing the door behind her. She gives me a wary look but doesn't push. I've gone over this a hundred times in my head, so hopefully she'll be okay and won't ask a lot of questions. I don't want to have to lie to her. I swore I would never do that again, and I won't.

"I told Captain I needed to be alone tonight. I said I got my period and I wasn't feeling good."

She looks at me in puzzlement and tilts her head to the side. "You hardly ever get your period. You've been irregular since I've known you."

"I know. That's not the point," I say, hating that she knows me so well. How does she know exactly when I get my period and when I don't? That's some creepy friendship shit right there.