Hidden(21)

I watch Dillon mount his horse with ease and take control. I feel flush and have to fan my face. As Buster follows him through the trails, my eyes have a hard time leaving his backside as he rides that horse. I can’t help but watch all the muscles in his body flexing.

As the horses pick up their pace and start a slow gallop, I feel the breeze lift strands of my hair into the air. I look up to the blue skies and the sunshine and then all around me at the never ending acres of trees and meadows. Birds are flying and butterflies are fluttering around us. I feel free. I smile to myself. I never thought I’d feel like this. It’s exhilarating.

We come upon a clearing and Buster stops behind Ben. Dillon jumps down and fastens their leads to a tree. He jogs over and reaches his arms out to me. I remember watching him catch his girlfriend in his arms. I suddenly get incredibly nervous.

“Lean down and put your hands on my shoulders. I’ll pull you down. It’s okay.”

I lean down and put my hands on his shoulders as he reaches up to grab my hips and he lifts me into the air. I swing my leg over the horse and keep my legs straight as boards so they go straight down to the ground instead of around his body. My feet hit the ground and I bounce on my feet and let go of his shoulders. “Thanks.”

“So, I brought us a picnic lunch so we can sit and relax.” He spreads out a thin blanket on the grass and hands me a bottle of water. “I brought some crackers and cheese and some grapes. Not much, but I’m a guy and that’s all I could come up with.”

“Sounds good.” I sit on the blanket with my legs crossed and Dillon sits right next to me with his legs stretched out in front of him while he leans back on his arms. I pop a grape in my mouth and the explosion of juice causes a small moan to escape my mouth. “Wow. These are so good.”

“Like grapes?” He asks with a raised eyebrow. My excitement over a grape must confuse him.

“Never really had them. We didn’t really get fresh fruit, mostly canned fruit. We ate a lot of canned vegetables, soups, bread…..anyway.” I shake my head.

“You’re a strong girl, Amy. You may not see it right now, but I do. What kept you going?”

I think about that for a moment. I never considered myself a strong person. I just did what I could to get through each day.

“I read a lot. Got lost in the characters and the stories. I also used to write everything in a journal and I think it really helped me. I would write about my hopes and dreams. It was like my own therapy, you know? My mother didn’t like what I wrote so she burned it.” I choke back those negative memories. “Anyway, I don’t want to talk about it, so tell me about your normal childhood.”

He pops a grape in his mouth and my eyes drift right to his lips as he chews. I’m jealous of those lips. They look slightly swollen. Any girl would die to have them, or have them on her.

“Let’s see. I grew up on the ranch with my dad and Laney. Laney’s married to a surgeon and has a three-old named Daisy. She’s absolutely adorable. You’re going to love her. My mom left when we were little to live in the city. The big city, actually. She’s in New York. Laney went to live with her for a little while, but then missed the ranch and came back until she went to school in Denver. She met Caiden at school, they got married and they chose to stay in Denver. My dad likes to write so he travels to Denver for business now and then. That’s where he is now. He writes books about ranching. You’ll like him. He’s really cool. Not much else to tell.”

“Do you talk to your mom?”

“Um. Yeah. Not often. She calls every once in a while to catch up. I’m not mean to her, but I’m still angry. I was only six when she left. Laney was ten and needed her. My dad had no idea how to raise two kids on his own, especially a ten year old girl. It was a really hard time. I tried to be there for Laney and my dad. I didn’t want anything to do with my mom for a long time. Laney visits her all the time. She wants Daisy to have a relationship with her grandmother. Anyway, we got through it and my dad was great. He stepped up and made sure we didn’t feel like we were missing anything. Laney took dance classes. He baked cupcakes with her. I played barbies with her and talked to her about boys.” He laughs.

“You were probably the cutest little kid.” I try to picture a small toothless Dillon playing barbies with his big sister and it makes me smile.

“I was a quiet kid. Kept to myself. I didn’t have many friends. I got along better with the horses.” He laughs and shrugs his shoulders.

“Sounds like you were a great brother.”