"I let him convince me that our love was unstoppable," she continued. "Because that's what fated love is supposed to be. Unstoppable. No matter what obstacles are put between you and your mate, when you're fated, the instinct to be together is said to be so strong, it burns a fire inside you. Being apart is said to cause actual pain. The pull to be together, all-consuming."
"That doesn't sound very good."
"You don't think it's romantic?"
Nash laughed. "No. I think it sounds terrible." He reached for her hand and squeezed. "Tell me the rest."
Kira nodded and almost laughed herself because she couldn't disagree with him. It did sound terrible.
"There isn't a whole lot more to tell except I fell for it. I left with him and his clan mates. He told me we were headed to his clan's lands in Colorado but we only made it as far as the gate of Yellowstone before my brothers caught up with us."
"How many brothers do you have?"
"Three. Axel, Luke, and my twin, Kade." Her heart clenched just saying his name. "My grandfather sent them to bring me back."
"But you wouldn't go?"
She shook her head. "I was in love, remember? Fated." Saying it out loud made her want to spit. Or growl. "And because they love me, they believed me and accepted my choice. They left." Her heart caught in her throat. She swallowed down the pain, remembering the way they'd turned and walked away from her. At the time, Kira knew they were doing it out of love and respect for her, but it still hurt more than she'd ever thought was possible. "It was only a few days after they left that Ryan dumped me and the truth came to light. He'd used me to get back at my family. You see, the real reason my grandfather didn't want us to go anywhere near him and his clansmen was because our family had a long-standing feud with the Dixon clan. It dated back generations and my grandfather knew what I had to learn the hard way: nothing but trouble would come from that clan."
"So what happened? Why didn't you go home when you learned the truth?"
It was a question she'd only asked herself once, before she'd discovered the harsh reality that her twin brother had shunned her. "They didn't want me," she said simply. "I tried to reach out to Kade. Our bond as twins is stronger than a normal sibling bond. When we're in our bear forms, we can sense each other. Even from a distance. I'm told it's something like having a mate, but again, I wouldn't know." Her voice was devoid of the bitterness of her words. "Anyway, it was the first thing I did. As soon as I got the chance, I shifted and went for a run to call out for him. Nothing. So I did it again. Night after night after night, for months. But there was nothing. I couldn't even get a sense for him. He'd shut me off." The knot of pain that she'd carried with her deep in her stomach for years tightened. "It hurt more than the humiliation of Ryan's abandonment. A lot more. So that final night when I ran through the trees, reaching out for Kade, trying to connect with him, and got nothing, I made a decision."
"You'd deny your bear," Nash finished for her.
She nodded and reached for her coffee cup, cold now. "I didn't deserve it. And there was no point to it. They didn't want me. I needed to start over and that was easier if I wasn't a bear."
"But you are a bear."
Kira laughed. "Only if I want to be. It's worked up until now. Until you came along and sensed it."
"But I only barely sensed your bear."
"See? It's working."
Nash pushed back from his chair and came around the table. He pulled her into his strong arms and squeezed her tight before he pulled back, his hands firmly on her shoulders. "It is most definitely not working. You can't shut off who you are, Kira. I sensed your bear, even if it was hidden, because you are a bear and the longer you pretend you're not, the longer you're delaying your happiness. And Kira, even if you don't think you do, you deserve to be happy. You deserve everything and that starts with embracing your animal."
She shook her head and pulled out of his grip. She didn't want to look at him. The conversation had been too raw and far too real for first thing in the morning. Her glow from earlier had vanished and at that moment, she would have done anything to get it back. "I don't know if I can." Her voice was quiet and weak, almost defeated, and she hated it. "I'm afraid."
"Babe, you have nothing to be afraid of." Nash squeezed her arms and she looked up into his gray eyes. They were so full of kindness and an understanding she hadn't seen in anyone since … before … longer than she could remember. "That's what we're doing tonight," Nash declared.