When I get to work I throw myself into it and try to push away thoughts of Maggie and Major. I don’t want to worry about if he’s okay because I know he is. He’s the best Marine I know, and he could survive any situation. If he was able to activate a signal when he landed, then I know he’s going to be okay. It’s just a matter of time when he comes home.
Maggie, on the other hand, is a whole other ball game. We need to talk, and I know this might not be the right time with the stress of the situation around us, but I don’t know if I can keep my distance much longer. She’ll be eighteen in a month, so she can make any decision she wants after that. But I need her to know how I feel in my heart and that I’ll wait for her to decide.
By the time the alarm on my watch beeps, I know it’s time to go get Maggie from school. I have a bounce in my step knowing that I’m going to get to see her again. Yesterday was bittersweet, and last night was rough. Knowing I was in the same house as her again but not able to talk to her was the worst. Hopefully today we’ll be able to have some time together and I can get this weight off my chest.
Chapter 15
Maggie
This might possibly be the longest day of my life, and I’m not sure if I’m thankful for that or not. It doesn’t matter. The bell is about the ring, bringing the school day to an end, and I’ll have to face him. I thought about dodging Eli and not riding home with him, but what’s the point? We’ll just have to see each other at the house. I would be avoiding the inevitable. I need to get this over with. We have to come up with a new plan. No way can I live with him for the next month until I’m eighteen. I won’t make it. One thing I am sure of, I’m definitely not going back to my SAT class. I don’t think I can face interacting with a woman Eli has been seeing.
The idea of him with someone else makes me want to throw up and punch something at the same time. My eyes water as I think about it again. God, I don’t know if I can do this. I know I have to get it together. I can’t be a mess in front of Alice. I’m the strong one, the one who calms everyone, but I’m not sure if I can do my fake smile anymore.
What he was saying to me when he got interrupted doesn’t make sense. It isn’t adding up. He made it sound like he’d been mildly stalking me. Well, maybe not mildly, but still. I think knowing that now could make it worse. If he had feelings for me and still dated other women… That would be so messed up. A tear escapes, and I quickly wipe it away, not wanting anyone to see.
When I get outside, I spot Eli’s truck. He’s staring right at me, and I know he saw the tear slip free. I want to run, but he must see it in my eyes. Before I know what’s happening, his giant body unfolds from the truck and he’s standing in front of me. His eyes never stray from mine.
“Sunshine.”
How can he say my name so softly but still imbue it with a warning? If I run, he’ll chase me. I see it written all over his face. It reminds me of the times we’d practice self-defense and how it would turn playful and fun. God, I miss that. I miss him so much, but I’m starting to think maybe he hasn’t missed me the same way. It was easy for him to find a substitute for me.
Shaking the thoughts from my head, I move around Eli and walk to the passenger side of the truck. But he’s there just as fast, opening the door for me. I climb in, and he closes the door behind me. I buckle my seatbelt as he comes around—I don’t want what happened this morning to happen again. I can’t stand for him to be that close to me.
He jumps in, starts the truck, and pulls out.
“I didn’t know that woman’s name before this morning when she told me,” he fires out like he’s been dying to tell me the words.
“Oh, so you don’t even bother with their names first?” I throw back. I’m suddenly so angry I yell at him.
“I guess you could say that. Maybe because I don’t give a shit about other women. There have been no other women. There’s only you!” he yells back.
I stare at him, and the tears I was holding back fall.
“Sunshine, don’t cry. I’m sorry, baby, I didn’t mean to yell. I just can’t handle you thinking I’ve been with someone else, that I’ve betrayed you like that.”
His words don’t stop my tears. They only make them flow more.
“Shit. I’m making it worse.” He pulls the truck off to the side of the road, and it’s then I notice where we are headed. To the lake. Where we shared our first kiss. I’d thought so many times about that night. I was never able to bring myself to come back here, though.