Her Naughty Holiday(19)
She put her head down on the table and forced herself to breathe. She had to breathe. If she didn’t breathe, she would cry, and she didn’t want to cry. When her family got to her like this she’d cry and it would take an hour before she could make herself stop. In, she breathed. Out, she breathed. In...out... Erick was wonderful...she breathed that in. Erick liked her and respected her...she breathed that out. Her business was a success and she had a lot to be proud of...she breathed that in. She didn’t need her family’s approval to feel good about her life...she breathed that out.
Clover heard a sound, a soft tapping on glass. She raised her head and saw Erick standing on her deck, knocking on the back door. When she opened the door she didn’t let him inside. She just stepped forward into his arms.
“Whoa, baby. What’s wrong?” he asked, pulling her close to him, wrapping his arms tight around her.
“I called my mother. Why did I do that?”
“Temporary insanity?” he asked, and she laughed.
“That’s definitely it.”
“What did she say? Tell me all about it so I can tell you how wrong she is.”
“Give me a minute. I just... I need this.” As embarrassing as it was to stand on her deck in the drizzle and cling to Erick like a life preserver, she did it, anyway, because someone in need of a life preserver clung to it no matter how ridiculous she looked or felt doing it.
Erick held her against him. He ran his large strong hands up and down her back, massaged her tight shoulders and kissed the top of her head.
“Tell me all about it,” he said softly. “Get it out.”
“It’s like...” Clover paused and tried to figure out a way to explain it. “It reminds of something that happened right before I had my reduction surgery. I was a little overweight—only about twenty pounds, but it was enough I couldn’t fit into my favorite clothes. The older I got, the harder it was to deal with my breasts. I couldn’t jog or even go for long walks. So I had the surgery and could finally exercise. Between the surgery in July and Christmas when I saw my family again, I’d had the reduction and lost the twenty pounds. I went down two dress sizes. That’s it. Not a huge change, right?”
“Nope.”
“But when my family saw me, they went crazy. They told me over and over and over again how great I looked. Compliments, right? I mean, a normal person would take compliments as compliments. But it didn’t feel like a compliment. It felt like an insult. Was I that hideous before I lost the twenty pounds that they’d make that big a deal out of losing the weight? I thought I looked pretty good before, you know?” She looked up at Erick. “So now it’s happening again. They’re acting like it’s some kind of miracle I’m dating someone. They’re ‘thrilled’ for me. I didn’t win the lottery. I didn’t wake up from a coma. I’m seeing someone and they’re thrilled. My mom says she’s thrilled. My sister is freaking out. Even my brother and his wife texted me trying to get details about you. All thrilled, they say. And I should be thrilled they’re thrilled, right? Am I the worst daughter ever?”
“No.”
“Then what is it?”
“Well...you may not want to hear this, but I have a theory about your family.”
“I want to hear your theory. What do you think it is?”
“To use a technical term, they’re all a bunch of assholes.”
Clover’s eyes flew wide-open. She took a step back from him.
“What?”
“Your family sounds like they’re assholes. No offense. I’ve got a few assholes in my family, too. Ruthie has more than once accused me of being one of them.”
“My mother loves me, Erick. She wants what’s best for me. She just doesn’t know how to show it without making me feel...”
“What? How does your mother make you feel?”
“She makes me feel terrible about myself.”
“And your father?”
“Kind of terrible.”
“And your siblings?”
“They’re not as bad. They only make me feel really crappy sometimes.”
“Only sometimes? You know what they call someone who makes you feel terrible about yourself? They call that person an asshole. Say it. You’ll feel better.”
“I’m not going to call my family assholes. They love me.”
Erick put his arm around her and steered her to the table. He pulled out her chair and she sat down. He sat down in the chair facing her.
“Your family does love you. And I’m sure they aren’t actual assholes. They probably have no idea they’re making you feel so bad. But that isn’t an excuse. They shouldn’t make you feel bad. They should do what normal healthy families do and ignore you and your personal life until you screw up and they have to bail you out of jail. I’m speaking from experience here.”
“My family does not ignore me. I wish they ignored me. I’d kill for them to ignore me.”
“We’ll make it easy on them.”
“How?”
“We’re going to go away for two days. If you want to. I’m not making you. Ruthie says men shouldn’t dictate what happens on dates. I’m not dictating, only suggesting. I suggest we go away for two days.”
“Away? Where away?”
“We’re going to go all the way...five miles from here.”
“I think they have phones five miles from here. Five miles from here isn’t outer space. Unless we’re going five miles straight up.”
“Not straight up. Straight northwest. And it’ll be like space because you aren’t taking your phone with you. I talked to Chris Steffensen’s girlfriend, Joey, who’s also his property manager. She’s letting us test out one of their new rental cabins for two nights. We’re going to leave your phone here at this house. In case of emergency, we’ll have my phone to call 911 if a bear tries to get in the cabin or something. And while your phone is here, we’ll be there—eating, sleeping and having all the sex. What do you say to that?”
“Two days without answering my phone? My family will freak out.”
“How will you know they’re freaking if they can’t reach you?”
“They’ll freak out ten times as much when they do reach me.”
“You won’t see them until Thanksgiving. They’re not going to freak out on Thanksgiving because I’ll be there. Then they’ll meet me, it’ll calm them down when they see how great I am—”
“You are pretty great.”
“I am and I’m even better at faking being great. I’ll charm their pants off—not literally—and they’ll finally shut up about your personal life because they will finally see with their own judgmental eyes that you are in these two very capable hands.”
He held out his hands in front of her, palms up. They were quite capable-looking hands. They’d stripped her panties off her in a split second last night, massaged her breasts this morning and fixed her deck. Truly talented hands.
She put her hands in his, and he wrapped his fingers around hers, then lifted both her hands to his lips and kissed the backs of them.
“How does that sound?” he asked.
“It sounds pretty good,” she said. “Especially the part about being in your hands.”
“That was my favorite part, too.” His dark eyes twinkled mischievously. “I think you’ll like this place. I’ve already swung by and checked it out. It’s nice.”
“Do I need to bring anything?”
“I stocked the fridge already and brought over towels and stuff. They aren’t quite ready for business but the furniture’s all there, the appliances work and the electricity and water are running. Pack a bag for two nights and relax, because I’ve taken care of everything else.”
She liked the sound of that. Someone else, someone who wasn’t her, taking care of everything? When had that ever happened in her adult life?
“I’ll go pack, then. I promise I’ll leave the schooner sail here.”
“Bring it if you want. It’ll end up on the floor like anything else you put on.”
“That sounds like a challenge.”
“Does it?” he asked as he stood up and leaned back against the table.
“What if I’m wearing something so sexy you don’t want to take it off me?”
“The lingerie has not been invented that is sexier than the naked female body—yours specifically. But if you want to play that game, I’m up for it.”
“We’ll see what I have hidden in my closet...”
She started up the stairs and Erick stopped her by saying her name. She stood on the bottom step and he came to face her.
“What is it?” she asked.
“Don’t ask me why I’m asking this, but please tell me the truth. Are you disappointed with last night?”
She narrowed her eyes at him.
“What? No, of course not. Last night was...” She paused to search for a word. She couldn’t find one good enough so she went with a classic. “Wow.”
“It was wow?”
“Wow-wow,” she said, blushing. “And a little whoa, too.”
“Okay. Glad to hear it. I wouldn’t want to have accidentally, you know, dishonored the gift of your trust in me.”