Her Fierce Warrior (X-Ops #4)(39)

Layla looked at her in surprise. "Wow. How did you know that?"

Minka shrugged. "Men are very proud. If they can't get good jobs, it makes them very difficult to be around."

"That pretty much describes Jayson to a T," Layla said. "He used to be  in Army Special Forces with Landon and Angelo, but he got seriously  injured on a mission and wasn't able to stay on the team. He was doing  well for a while, but now it seems like he's starting to give up again.  Lately he's getting more depressed, and I'm worried that he's going to  hurt himself." Her eyes glistened with tears and she took a deep breath.  "He's home alone a lot, and he just sits around and thinks about all  he's lost. That's why I asked John to offer him a job. He needs  something to give him purpose and a reason to keep going. I'm not sure  it will be enough, but it's all I can think of right now."                       
       
           



       

Minka knew a thing or two about coming close to giving up. She had  gotten near that point many times while she'd been held captive. But  then she'd found Angelo, and he'd given her hope. It sounded like Jayson  needed something to hold on to long enough to see that things could get  better. She suspected Layla had been that thing for Jayson for a time,  but now he was getting lost again. He needed something else for now-a  new anchor-to help hold him steady until he realized that Layla was  there for him.

"Maybe you should get him a puppy," she suggested.

"What?" Layla said with a laugh.

Minka shrugged. "It's hard to be unhappy if you have a dog to take care  of. They have a way of making people see the brighter side of things.  And maybe the responsibility of taking care of a dog would help Jayson  focus on something else."

Layla thought about that. "You know, that might actually be a good idea. A therapy dog sounds like just what he needs."

Minka glanced at the watch John had given her yesterday with her new  uniform. It was probably time to go. She stood. "I should leave. Angelo  is waiting for me."

Layla got to her feet. "Before you go, there's something I wanted to ask  you. Ivy mentioned that she thought Angelo might be staying in  Tajikistan after the mission was over. You and he talked about that,  right? I mean, about him coming to DC after he gets back from  deployment?"

Minka had been doing her best not to think about Angelo and what it  would be like if she never saw him again, and having Layla come right  out and ask her that very question made it hard to hold back tears.

Layla frowned. "He's not coming back, is he?"

Hearing the anguish in Layla's voice was enough to almost push Minka  completely over the edge. She wiped a stray tear from her cheek. "I  don't know what he's going to do."

"How can you not know? The two of you are in love." Layla gave her a curious look. "You do love him, right?"

Minka couldn't see why she would need to hide that from Layla, especially since it seemed obvious her friend already knew.

"Yes," she whispered.

"And he loves you?"

Minka felt fresh tears spring to her eyes. "I don't know. He hasn't told  me how he feels. He tried to tell me that he would have to leave soon  and that he didn't want me to be hurt when he did," she said. Then, at  the flash of anger in Layla's eyes, she quickly added, "But I let myself  fall in love anyway. It's all my fault. I can't and won't blame him."

Layla regarded her in silence for a long time, then pulled Minka in for a  hug, wrapping her arms around her and squeezing tight. Minka hugged her  back.

"What are you going to do, Minka?" Layla asked when she stepped back.

Unfortunately, while Minka had been giving that question a lot of thought, she'd yet to come up with an answer.

"I don't know," she said honestly. "Sometimes it seems like there is no  place for me in this world if Angelo is not there with me."

* * *

At least the C-17 they were heading to Tajikistan on had real seats  instead of those fold-down jobs like the plane that had transported him  and Minka to the States. It didn't matter though, Angelo thought. Minka  had spent a good portion of the trip sleeping on his shoulder. Not that  he was complaining.

At the moment, however, she was leaning over the other way, against the  interior of the cabin wall, hugging his uniform jacket to her chest. She  was dressed in the nonmilitary uniform typically worn by private  contract security or embedded reporters, but she made it look good.  Gazing at her beautiful face, he couldn't help thinking about how his  outlook on everything had changed since she had come into his life.

He was still sitting there watching her sleep when Landon walked by, two  cups of coffee in his hands. Landon motioned with his head toward the  back of the cargo section. Angelo hesitated. He didn't like the idea of  her waking up and finding him gone, but she seemed to be sleeping  deeply. He quietly released his seat belt to follow his friend to the  back of the plane where a pallet of equipment was secured under a cargo  net.

Landon handed Angelo one of the cups, then leaned back against the gear. Angelo took a grateful swallow.

"Thanks," he said. "I always did like caffeine on a long flight in one of these loud tin cans."

"I remember," Landon said, pitching his voice to be heard above the  constant drone of the jet engines. "I would have brought some for Minka,  but she's been sleeping for most of the trip."

Angelo looked back at Minka, wanting to make sure she was still okay.  She'd gotten better about not freaking out whenever there was some space  between them, but he still worried about her.                       
       
           



       

Angelo leaned back against the stack of gear beside Landon, so he could  keep an eye on her. "I think the stress of the last few days has finally  caught up with her."

Landon sipped his coffee. "Does she know you'll be staying in Tajikistan with the team?"

Angelo stared down into his cup. "Yeah. We talked about it some last  night. I made sure she knows she can stay in the States and will be able  to keep working with Tanner."

In all honesty, he was worried as hell about leaving her to the mercy of  the DCO, but John had assured him that they wouldn't use or abuse  her-or turn her into a field agent.

Landon snorted. "Like I'm sure she gives a crap about that stuff."

Angelo slanted him a look. "What does that mean?"

"You're joking, right?" Landon asked. "Dude, the only thing Minka cares  about is knowing how you feel about her and when you're coming back. As  long as you two covered those topics, she'll be okay." When Angelo  didn't say anything, he frowned. "You told her, right?"

Angelo knew damn well where Landon was going with this, but he asked anyway. "Told her what?"

"That you've fallen for her."

Angelo shrugged and swigged more coffee. "Not in so many words. She knows I care about her, though."

"You care about her?" Landon echoed. "Well, I care about my truck. I  have a really good fitting pair of boots I'm even kind of fond of. I'm  not asking if you care about her. I'm asking if you love her."

"You can't fall in love with someone in a week," Angelo protested.

Even he winced at how lame that sounded.

"That's not an answer," Landon said. "It's an excuse, and a shitty one  at that. I knew I had it bad for Ivy the first time we met. Within a  week, I was so in love with her, I couldn't think straight. Are you  honestly going to try to convince me that what I've been seeing between  you and Minka isn't love?"

Angelo clenched his jaw. This conversation was getting too real, too  fast. Hell yes, he was in love with her. He had been since she'd curled  up and fallen asleep in his arms on the long flight from Tajikistan. He  just hadn't had the balls to admit it to himself because he'd been  scared to think about what came next.

"Yeah," he said hoarsely. "I love her. But it doesn't matter."

Landon frowned. "Doesn't matter? What the fuck are you talking about?  I'm pretty damn sure it matters to Minka. And it should matter to you."

"It does matter," Angelo snapped. If Landon hadn't been his best friend,  he'd have punched him right then. "Fuck! It matters, okay? I just don't  know what the hell to do about it. How fair is it to tell her something  like that, then disappear on a string of deployments for the next five  years?"

"You don't think she'd be willing to wait for you?"

He closed his eyes for a moment before answering. "Landon, we're talking about five years."

"So you spend every minute you can with her. Make sure she knows how  important she is to you. And you make it through the rest of your  enlistment the best you can-together."