Hellion, a New Adult Romance Novel(31)

 

“I wasn’t talking about with you, dipshit,” I say, trying not to smile.

 

“Oh. With who then?”

 

“Myself.”

 

“Now that’s just kinky.”

 

“Would you stop?” I turn to face him, still battling to keep the smile off my face. “Seriously. I know you’re a master player and I’m just not in the mood for it. I don’t have the strength to fight you off.”

 

He steps closer, keeping our clasped hands between us. “So don’t fight me off, then.”

 

I can feel his breath on my face. He’s had some alcohol to drink, but he’s not drunk. And now, looking into his eyes and feeling the heat coming from his body, I’m sure; he’s definitely making a move. The question is, what move is he making?

 

I lose my smile. “Mick, you need to understand something about me.”

 

“Okay, so tell me. I’m listening.” He moves just a fraction of an inch closer, and it makes me go hot all over in an instant.

 

Sweat breaks out between my shoulder blades. Is it humid out here or is it just me? “I am not in a good place right now. Normally I’d be all over this … whatever it is … but right now … I can’t. My best friend is wondering what the hell is going to happen with the rest of her life, I have to figure out a way to become self-sufficient soon so that someday in the probably not-too-distant future I can have Jersey move in with me, and I have to graduate and get a real fucking job. That leaves me exactly zero minutes in my day to get my heart broken. Do you get what I’m saying?” I want to cry right now. This totally sucks. I’m so lame.

 

“We all have shit that needs to get done. That doesn’t mean you can’t have a little fun at the same time.”

 

“Maybe not for you,” I say, feeling bitter over my circumstances. Usually it just energizes me to think of all the things I’m going to do, but now all I feel is regret and unfairness at it all. Why can’t I just be a party girl who doesn’t give a shit about her future or her family? Just for one night, even?

 

Mick responds. “Definitely not for me and definitely not for you either. How about you just give me a chance and we take it from there?”

 

My new smile has a tremble to it. I’m afraid to hope for what he might be proposing. “Did you just ask me out?”

 

He smiles back. “I think it was more me asking for permission to ask you out. I’m a little to scared to go right for the asking at this point.”

 

“Permission not granted.”

 

“Come to the movies with me tomorrow night. My treat. I’ll take you out to eat after at a really cool place.”

 

“No.”

 

“I’ll pick you up at six.”

 

“No. I’m busy. Washing my bedspread … and stuff.” I have no idea where that came from. My brain has a tumor in it, apparently.

 

“Okay, then, I’ll just take Jersey instead.”

 

I yank my hand out of his, all my flirty happiness dissipating into thin air. “No!” I take two steps towards the car, beyond pissed. “See? This is what I’m talking about! You can’t ingratiate yourself into my family like that!” I feel like I’m about to lose it. If I don’t get a grip on myself soon, I’m going to be screaming and crying at the same time. Looney bin city.

 

“Why not? I like your family.”

 

“So?! Who cares! Go get your own family!”

 

His face falls and he steps back, like I physically rammed into him or something. “Yeah. Okay. I got ya.” He goes over to the car, leaving me standing there on the sidewalk like the total asshole I am. God, I hate myself right now. What is wrong with me?

 

“Mick, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that.” Who tells a foster kid to fuck off her own family and go get one of his own? Yeah. That’s me. I’m the dirtbag who someone should run over right now.

 

He opens the door and gets in, starting the engine up. It rumbles to life as I stand outside his door.

 

“Are you just going to leave me here?” I ask. I fully expect him to drive away and leave me in a cloud of exhaust, and I wouldn’t blame him for a second if he did. I’m definitely going to get a blue ribbon for biggest bitch of the night.

 

He faces out the windshield, his expression serious. “Get in the car.”

 

I want to stand there and beg for his forgiveness, but I don’t. Because I’m a coward, I do what he says instead and ride all the way to my house without saying anything.