I glance around and look for Dixon, but don’t see him anywhere in the room. A pang of sadness hits me as realization dawns on me. I actually miss him and I’m hurt that he isn’t here.
Who the hell have I turned into?
I notice the two beds Kayden and Dixon slept on are all closed back up into chairs as I stand and stretch, trying to ease my aching muscles. These things were definitely made for convenience and not for comfort. I rub at my neck, which is as stiff as Dixon’s dick was just yesterday evening, and slip my flats on at the same time.
“Morning, Kayden. Any change?” I ask as I pad across the tile flooring, causing the short heel of my flats to click clack off of the floor.
My eyes settle on Savannah, who looks just as she had last night. My stomach knots with fear as I run my hand gently over hers, cupping it under mine.
“No change as of yet. But I guess it’s better to have her staying the same rather than having her take a turn for the worse. All we can do is let her know we’re here waiting for her and nothing will change that. We’ll stay by her side until she wakes up.”
I nod in agreement as his words sink in. I can’t help but feel the same way. I’d rather have her stay as she is now at least for the time being at least it means she isn’t being rushed away for more surgeries. I haven’t prayed in I don’t know how long. But right now I feel this overwhelming need to pray, beg, bargain. Whatever it’ll take to get the big guy upstairs to bring my best friend back to me.
“She’s going to wake up. I just know it.” I’m shocked with how well I pulled off sounding so sure of myself just now. Inside I’m quivering with fear that I’ll never get the girl I love like a sister back.
Kayden and I lock eyes momentarily. Without speaking a word, we both see the same thoughts reflecting in one another’s gaze. We’re both terrified that she will never wake up or if she does, she may not be the same person we love. His lips curl up into a weak smile before he shifts, bringing his attention back towards the television.
I plop down in the chair, still holding Savannah’s hand, and close my eyes, savoring the calm silence that’s settled in the room as Kayden gets lost once again in whatever TV show he’s watching.
I take the moment to have a powwow with God. I’d go to the chapel here, but I don’t want to leave Savannah’s side just yet.
Okay, God. I know it’s been way too long since I’ve talked to you and you probably have a lot of people chatting up your ear right now, but I hope you’ll hear me and answer my pleas. I’m not one to beg, but at this moment, I’ll do just about anything because I know if the roll was reversed, Savannah would do the same for me. Even though I know it’ll be hard, I promise to try and be a better Christian and even possibly attend mass sometime in the near future. I haven’t stepped into a church since my Confirmation…well because I was too busy getting laid and partying. But I’m growing up. I know, it's a shocker. I’m just as shocked myself. I’m turning twenty-five this year and still haven’t landed my big break in Hollywood. So I’m making a promise to you now. Save my best friend and bring her back to us and I’ll make it my life’s ambition to be a better Brooklyn in 2013. If I screw up, I hope you’ll cut me some slack because this is...ummm...all really new to me. Mmmkay?
Nice chat, big guy! We should do this more often.
The sound of my phone going off beside me on the stand next to Savannah’s bed brings me out of my thoughts. It’s blasting Move’s Like Jagger alerting me that Reagan is calling me. It was his jam for like ever after it first came out. He would make us listen to it every time we went in his damn car somewhere, so that’s been his special tone on my phone ever since. Now it brings a smile to my face. I remember a few months back, Reagan started bitching about how it’s been a year and I still have that song for him instead of something sexy. He’s always trying to get into my panties one way or another. But that is never gonna happen. Sure he’s sex on a fricking stick, but its Reagan. I swear it’d be incest some way. He’s like a big brother to Savannah and me. We could never cross that line.
I snatch my phone and cringe as a nurse pops her head into the door, “Can we please have all mobile devices set to silence.” Her tone is short and snarky as she makes her way into the room and over to Savannah. I quickly climb out of the chair, giving her room to work.
“Sorry.” I say, giving her and Kayden each a sympathetic smile.
Opening the text, I see that Reagan has landed in Houston along with Rebecca. I’m so glad she was able to come too. I know it’ll mean the world to Savannah being surrounded by her best friends when she needs us all the most.
I type out a quick reply letting her know to message me when he gets here so I can meet him at the entrance of the hospital.
Turning to Kayden, I clear my throat softly to get his attention. Pointing towards the door, I tell him, “I’m going to see if I can find something to eat and some coffee. Do you want anything?” I’d run to a store and get us something better than hospital food but I don’t have a vehicle.
Of course he shakes his head no. Stubborn man. He needs food to keep his strength up. I’ll grab him something and, if I have to, I’ll force feed it to his stubborn ass.
I almost ask where Dixon went, but then stop myself. The last thing I want to do is make myself look clingy and reveal to Kayden that I’m into Dixon more than I’m letting on. I opt to text the asshole instead. I can’t believe he’d leave and not even say a word to me. I guess I was just seeing what I wanted to see when he appeared on my damn doorstep yesterday.
Rubbing the tired out of my eyes, I head down the corridor and look for signs that’ll direct me towards the cafeteria. I catch my reflection in the chrome doors of the hospital elevator and cringe. I’m grateful the place is pretty empty seeing that it’s like seven in the morning.
It dawns on me what the date is as I’m smoothing my hair with my fingers trying to tame the tangled mess. It’s New Year’s Eve. This will be the first year that Savannah and I won’t be wishing each other a 'Happy New Year!' at the stroke of midnight.
We’ve celebrated together every year since we were kids and our parents took turns throwing lavish parties to ring in the New Year. This was going to be the first time since we’ve been best friends that we weren’t going to spend it together. Though we’d planned on calling one another as soon as the clock struck midnight and she finished sucking face with Knox.
The crazy thing is that I’ll still get to say it but, unless she wakes up today, she won’t be saying it back.
With my hands full of coffees and the only edible food the hospital had, I head back to Kayden’s room just as my cell goes off this time vibrating against my butt. I find a side table decorated with a vase of flowers and plop everything on to it and fish my phone out of my back pocket.
Reagan:
We r here. Cab dropped us off at doors closest to ICU…
I type back a reply letting him I’ll be waiting for him. Since I’m already near the entrance that’s closest to the ICU, I collect all the food and coffee and walk over to the wall of glass windows and automatic doors.
I immediately spot Reagan. He looks like hell. I imagine he and Rebecca sat at the airport all night until their flight boarded. He’s wearing khakis and a peacoat with Chuck Taylors. His fauxhawk is now flat to his head, hanging off to the right. He keeps running his hands through it nervously as he drags his luggage behind him. I notice Rebecca beside him wearing sweats and a hoodie, looking nothing like the fashionista from Envy. But comfort over style is the way to go when flying, especially after a night of heavy drinking like we all had last night. Thankfully, I’m feeling pretty good for the amount I drank last night. Everything with Savannah sobered me up pretty quickly.
The second they step through the doors and spot me, small smiles grace their lips and mine. I feel instantly better having them here. We’re one another’s rock whenever any of us are in trouble. Reagan, Savannah and I are the three musketeers always having each other’s backs. Rebecca fits into our small circle perfectly whenever she’s around.
I bounce on the balls of my feet, “I’m so glad you guys are here.”
Wrapping me in a hug, taking extra care not to spill the coffees, I’m gasping as Reagan holds me for a few beats as we stand in the corridor of the hospital, relishing in the silent support we’re giving one another.
Releasing me, Reagan grabs the paper plate full of bagels and cream cheese containers.
“How is she?” He finally asks after following me through the double doors with the words ICU on them.
I glance over my shoulder back at Rebecca and him, trying my best to appear optimistic. We need everyone to remain positive. Positive vibes will help bring Savannah back to us. I just know it. “She’s the same as she was when I talked to you last night. But the way we look at it, is no change is good change because it could get worse before it gets better. But we all know Savannah’s a fighter. She’ll wake up in no time. She’s just being stubborn and getting extra beauty sleep thanks to all the cuts and bruises she got from the accident.”