“I need no mittens,” he tells me and presses a kiss to my forehead. “The weather is warm enough for sa-khui.”
I look out into the heavily falling snow and sigh. He’s not wrong, but I still don’t like it. “And you have my firestarter?” I touch my neck, now bare. Normally the humans all wear one of the computer parts brought back from the Elders’ Ship, because they’re made of some sort of graphite or metal or something that sparks easily to make fire. I don’t plan on leaving the cave, however, so I’ve given mine to him.
He reaches under his cloak and shows me the necklace. “It is here.”
I nod slowly. I can’t think of any other things to ask him. “You’ve got food? And drink? And—“
Cashol cups my face with his free hand. “I will be fine. Now, come, devour my face like Jo-see is devouring Haeden’s.”
I look over and Josie has her arms flung around Haeden’s much bigger form. She even has a leg hooked around his hips and he’s got her lifted into the air as they suck face. It’s…pretty impressive. I’m envious because she’s still small and lithe and I’m…well, ‘lumbering’ is probably the kindest word. I pat my huge belly. “You’re going to have to settle for a more sedate hug and kiss, I’m afraid. I’ve got a bit of a roadblock.”
Cashol grins and gives me a smacking kiss, then leans down and gives the same to my belly. “You must be good, Gancas, my son. Do not come before I return home.”
“That is a terrible name,” I point out. Jesus, he’s awful at naming, but it makes me smile to hear it. Better than ‘Goof’. “And it might be a girl, remember?”
“It is not,” he says, smoothing a hand over my belly in the hopes of catching the baby kicking one last time. “Rokan says it is a boy and Rokan is never wrong about these things.”
I make a face. It feels like a girl to me, but…Rokan does have a pretty uncanny ability to predict small things. “Speaking of Rokan, what’s he say about the weather?”
Cashol hops to his feet again and gives me another kiss. “He says you should kiss your mate and send him on his way.”
That’s…not a good answer. “Cashol? What’s Rokan say about the weather?” I’d go find Rokan myself but he left the cave on a journey with one of the new girls yesterday.
“He says it will snow.” Cashol shrugs. “It does not matter if it is little snow or much snow, I still must hunt.”
I swallow hard. This isn’t helping my anxiety much. “How long will you be gone?”
“Until the caches on my trail are full. It might be two hands of days, or it might be less.”
“Your hands or mine?” I ask, wiggling my four fingers at him. He’s only got three and a thumb.
He grins. “Does it matter?”
“It matters to me!”
He sets his spear aside and puts his hands on my shoulders. “Meh-gan,” he says, voice so gentle that it makes my insides ache. “I will be back when I have done my job as a hunter. It does not mean I will not miss you. It does not mean I will not think of you and your sweet smile every waking moment. It means I will be providing for you and our son. And I will be back in time to see him born, I promise.”
The hot tears that I’ve been fighting to hold back come pouring out in a rush of snot and sobbing. “Okay,” I blubber at him. “I love you, Cashol.”
“I love you, my resonance.” He kisses me on the mouth, even though I’m probably not very cute at the moment. “And I will be back.”
I nod and do my best not to cling to him as he pulls away from me. I wave goodbye as he picks up his spear again and heads out, joined by Haeden. It takes everything I have not to run after him, screaming for him to take me with him, but that wouldn’t be dignified or practical.
Still, it does my evil, awful heart good to see Josie sniffling beside me. At least I’m not suffering alone. I put an arm around her waist and give her an awkward hug. “Come on, let’s go have some kah-hraku-tea and drown our sorrows.”
Her little sob is punctuated by a disgusted laugh.
It isn’t until I lie down for a nap that I realize there’s a lump in the bed, under the covers. It digs into my back and I pull it out awkwardly.
It’s a…well, I’m not entirely sure what it is. The sa-khui use bone for the majority of their daily utility needs, since there’s not a Pottery Barn anywhere nearby. This rounded disk could be a plate or the makings of something else entirely, if it weren’t for the weird decorations on it. There’s a hole bored through the center with a leather cord tied through it, and it’s colored with a very messy looking squiggle. It’s…almost like a K? Or a M. Which makes me wonder.
I sit up and study it. I’ve never seen it before, but it’s in my bed so it was clearly meant for me. Is it sloppy handwriting? Something else?
Confused, I haul my ungainly body back out of bed, wrap a warm fur around me, and pad into the main cavern again.
Georgie’s there with her baby in her lap, and Farli’s seated next to her. They’re whispering and both look up with guilty expressions when I approach.
Yeah, bingo. They’re up to something. I hold up the weird disk thingie. “What the heck is this and why was it in my bed?”
“Your bed?” Georgie bounces Talie on her knee, her brows drawing together. “What do you mean?”
“Did you guys go in my cave?”
Farli shakes her head, and then covers her mouth to hide her giggle.
“But you know what this is?”
They exchange a look and Georgie begins to smile. “I might have an idea.”
I’m starting to get cranky. I’m tired, and sore, and my mate is gone and I don’t feel like playing games. “So what is it, already?”
“That, I honestly don’t know,” Georgie says, reaching for the disk. I hand it to her and she studies it. “Oh dear.” Her lips twitch. “This is pretty bad.”
“What’s going on?” I’m utterly mystified.
“So, after Vektal and Cashol talked the other day, Cashol came and spoke to me. He was worried about leaving your side.”
Farli gets up and offers me her seat, and I take it with a heavy thump, fascinated by what Georgie’s telling me. “Because of the baby?”
She shakes her head and hands the bone disc-thingie back to me. “Because of you,” she says gently. “He worries you’ll struggle if he’s gone.”
Tears prick at my eyelids. “He’s not wrong. He’s only been gone a few hours and…it’s hard.” I feel an empty gulf where my laughing, funny mate normally is, and it hurts.
“I know. It’s always hard, but it’s necessary.” There’s no judgment on her face. “So he asked me what he could do to keep your mind off of him. Something to keep you distracted. I suggested a treasure hunt.”
“You did?” I knew I’d been taking a fair amount of naps recently but for Cashol and Georgie to come up with a treasure hunt on the down-low and me not realize it? That’s kind of crazy.
“Well, actually I suggested a lot of different things. The only idea he actually liked was the treasure hunt.”
I hold up the disc. “So this is part of that?”
She shrugs. “I honestly don’t know. I told him the concept - that there are clues and arrows left to point to the treasure - and didn’t hear anything else about it.”
Oh, my goodness. Is this a clue? Is the painted, sad looking squiggle supposed to be an arrow? I study the object again. Instead of seeing a crudely made object with drunken lettering, I see it for what it really is - an item lovingly made by my mate, probably while I was asleep. He made it without a lot of time to work on it, and the squiggle that should be an arrow probably looks like that because the sa-khui have no need for arrows or symbols except as decoration.
I sniff. Hard. And then I start to cry. “This is the sweetest thing ever.”
“I know,” Georgie says. She waves a finger in front of Talie’s face and smiles when the baby reaches for it. “He’s thoughtful, that man of yours.”
“He’s the best.” I mean it, too. I’m already thinking of ways I can show him that I appreciate his thoughtfulness. I’m going to have to have his favorite meal ready for when he comes home, and blend some of his favorite tea-leaves. Maybe I’ll make a new pouch for his spearheads. His favorite hood is worn through, and I can make him a new one, and…oh, there are so many things. It suddenly feels like not enough time to do everything.
“Well?” Georgie asks when I’m lost in thought.
“Well…what?” The baby kicks hard and I put a hand to my belly, momentarily confused.
She laughs. “What about the treasure hunt?”
“Oh!” I gaze down at the disc I’m clutching tight in my hand. It kind of feels like the prize all on its own. But Cashol’s put so much thought into making me happy, and I want to see what he’s done. I’ll probably weep like a crazy person over each new thing, but that’s all right, too.
It’s funny - knowing that he set this up makes me feel less alone. Like he’s here at my side even when he’s not. I feel a smile tugging at my mouth, and it feels like the first genuine one I’ve had all day. I picture Cashol bent over this ugly disc, working hard on it and anticipating setting me off on this little mini-adventure while he’s out on a real one.