“Just a few supplies that you might need tonight,” Patience answered. “It never hurts to be prepared.” She offered with a wink, holding up a handful of condoms for Harmony to see in the reflection of the mirror.
Harmony’s jaw dropped. “Are those….”
Patience nodded eagerly, stuffing a few more packets in Harmony’s purse. “Rubbers? Yep, sure are!”
“Patience McKinnon! You take those out of my bag right now!”
“Don’t you dare,” Faith ordered Patience over her own shoulder. “You know the saying, sis. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure,” she proclaimed, tugging on Harmony’s hair as she swept it off her sister’s neck into an easy updo.
“You’re both nuts!” Harmony almost whimpered, cringing as Faith’s tugs became almost painful. She made a mental note to thank Honor for keeping Heaven occupied baking cookies in the kitchen. There’s no way in hell she’d want her baby girl witnessing this circus. At least one McKinnon sister had enough sense to know how to behave!
“Put a clean pair of underwear in there, too,” Faith advised, ignoring Harmony’s cringe as she leaned down to whisper in Harmony’s ear, “Doin’ the walk of shame in dirty underwear wouldn’t be any fun at all.”
Swatting at her sister and missing, Harmony snapped, “I am NOT sleeping with Jake tonight. Why in the world are y’all suddenly pimping me out to the first man to take an interest?”
“First of all, he ain’t the first man to come sniffin’ around you, Harmony,” Aunt Orla pointed out as she fussed with her own pocketbook. “He’s just the first one we liked well enough to make an effort. Second, I’m not advocatin’ that you offer the man your entire milk supply, but givin’ the poor, thirsty dear a drink is just the Christian thing to do. Speakin’ of which, put this in her bag, too, Patience,” she directed, finally locating a clear plastic baggy from her purse and handing it over to her niece.
This time, Harmony managed to turn completely around in her seat and watched as Patience took the mystery bag from their aunt. “Do I even wanna ask what you’ve put in there, Aunt Orla?” she asked, growing more anxious when her aunt’s smile turned positively wicked.
“That there has been my saving grace for the last ten years, girl,” Aunt Orla pronounced with a satisfied smirk.
Craning her neck to see what they were talking about, Faith asked, “What is that?”
“One of your Uncle Jethro’s little blue pills,” Orla informed the girls primly. Aiming an understanding look in Harmony’s direction, she shrugged. “Like mine, your man is quite a few years older than you are, darlin’. He might need a little assistance to get his flag flyin’ high and proud. Think of it as a little grease to oil his pole.”
Harmony nearly swallowed her tongue as she realized what the old woman was saying. Uncle Jethro was 86 and deaf as a post. And they were still active?! There were no words for a moment like this.
“Yeah, and just remember, if the flag won’t lower after four hours, don’t bother tryin’ to turn it upside down. Seek medical attention,” Faith added with a wide grin, patting her sister’s head. “Just don’t call Cain, okay? We’ve got plans that don’t include your man’s unmentionables.”
Turning back toward the mirror, Harmony stared numbly at her reflection as her sisters and aunt continued to cackle behind her. Just how badly would she be hurt if she made a break for the window?
Chapter Five
As Jacob withdrew his tall body from behind the wheel of his gleaming black truck and looked toward the front of the white two-story McKinnon farmhouse, his chiseled jaw hardened and he frowned at what he saw. Grabbing the flowers and gifts he’d picked up earlier, he slammed the truck door, all while keeping one eye on front door of the house. The ordinary wooden door stood wide open for anyone who might choose to walk inside. Only an insubstantial screen door that had seen better days stood between him and the women that lived inside the house. A quick glance around confirmed that at least they had a couple of strong-looking security lights installed at the two front corners of the house. That screen door obviously would be the first improvement he was making for Harmony.
Climbing the solid steps to the wraparound porch, he could hear Heaven’s giggles and the soft, serene voice of her Aunt Honor from somewhere within the home. Knocking with a firm fist on the screen door, he heard pounding feet head toward him and smiled as he watched Heaven skitter around the corner, her long blonde hair flying behind her.