Hard Tail(65)

"Hah! Beat you!" I gasped, bending over to rest my hands on my legs while I got my breath back. "What are these things, anyway?" I asked, looking around at the low concrete blocks that lined the shore. "Did there use to be something here?"




 

 

"It's to do with the D-Day landings," Matt confirmed, his face flushed from the run. "They built these huge concrete boxes here and towed them out to France …  It's all on a board over there. And you see the big bars of chocolate?" Startled, I followed his pointing finger with my gaze and saw a sort of concrete flooring laid on the beach that did, indeed, resemble giant bars of chocolate. "They were so the tanks wouldn't sink in the sand when they drove them onto the ships."

We wandered over to the board, which told us Matt's "huge concrete boxes" had been caissons-or basically, huge concrete boxes-which were constructed here on the beach and towed across to Normandy for D-Day. They'd formed part of a floating harbour the size of Dover, needed to handle supplies for the 160,000 Allied invasion forces who'd landed in France. It must have been a staggering undertaking-I could hardly believe the six-thousand-ton behemoths would have even floated.

I stood and stared out to sea, shading my eyes from the sun with one hand. What must it have been like for those men, I wondered, leaving English shores and not knowing if they'd ever return? "If we'd been born sixty years earlier, that could have been us going off to fight," I mused. "Sort of puts your own troubles into perspective, doesn't it?" I suddenly remembered who I was talking to. "Shit. Sorry-didn't mean to-"

"No-No, you're right." Matt said. He bit his lip. "I really was daft to stay with him so long, wasn't I?"

I hesitated, then put a hand on his shoulder to reassure him. I tried to ignore the effect the physical contact was having on me as I spoke. "When you're right in the middle of a situation, it's often hard to keep your perspective." I looked at my watch. "We should probably head back now."

We walked back along the shingle, me with my hands shoved firmly in my pockets because I wasn't sure I could trust them not to stray back over to Matt if I didn't keep an eye on them. Matt did the same, but I didn't flatter myself it was for the same reason.

"You know, it's weird," I said, struggling to formulate my thoughts even as I spoke. "All this time, I've been thinking that this-me being down here, I mean-was just a sort of interruption. Normal service will be resumed shortly, that sort of thing. But now I'm not so sure." I took a deep breath, the smell of the sea filling my lungs. "Now-coming back to this place-I think maybe this is my normal life. Or should have been. It was living in London that was the aberration." As we reached the car park, Matt fumbled in his pocket for his keys, his gaze not leaving my face for a second. "Maybe … maybe I had to go away to learn to appreciate it-but I stayed too long, and I forgot it instead. But now, it's all coming back." I frowned. "Does that make sense?" 

Matt nodded. "You know what? You couldn't pay me to live in London. All those people crammed in together, all breathing the same air."

"It's not as bad as you think," I said, wondering if I really believed it myself. I sighed. "But it's not like this."

We got back into the car, and I batted fondly at the furry dice hanging from the rearview mirror. When they settled back into position, both sixes were facing me. It felt like an omen, and I smiled.

***

"You're not going to karate tonight, are you?" Matt asked as we washed up after dinner that evening. We'd picked up a few ingredients for veggie pasta when we'd been shopping earlier, which Matt had cooked up with my dubiously helpful assistance. It had all seemed so simple, I'd wondered what on earth I'd been making a fuss about all these years.

"Why?" I asked. I'd been looking forward to going to karate, as it happened.

"It's just-if Steve sees you, he'll ask where I am."

"You think I'd tell him?" I was hurt he'd even consider it.

"No-course not. It's just …  Look, don't take this the wrong way, but I think he'll be able to tell if you're lying." Matt gave me a nervous look, apparently worried he'd offended me.

In fact, I was grateful for the timely warning-my Judas face would have given me away in thirty seconds. I turned to the sink and pretended to scrub the coffee stains out of a mug. "Actually, I, er, I thought I ought to go and see Jay tonight. See how that leg's getting on." I mentally crossed my fingers Matt wouldn't invite himself along. "But I don't like leaving you here on your own. How about I call Adam?"