Hard Luck Hank Screw the Galaxy(94)

“You work for the Navy. You’re higher rank than I was,” she said, seeming particularly irritated by that fact.

“This was before that,” I said.

“Oh.”

“We’ll have backup, Delovoa.”

“Start thinking up words and phrases,” I said. “You got it to go berserk in just like ten seconds of trying. You know it’s ancient Colmarian. Work on it.”

“Work how? I can’t go to my lab and build sentences with metal parts.”

“I can put you in touch with the Navy. You’re my official advisor now. Garm, what’s a good Navy title for that?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” she said, annoyed.

“I’ll give you a title too,” I stated, trying to appease her. “What do you want?”

“I want the Navy gone and the Boranjame not coming. Barring that, call me whatever you like.”

“Alright then, Grumpy Garm.”

“Do I get paid for this?” Delovoa asked, seeming to finally brighten at his prospects.

“Sure. If we live.”



Later at Jyen and Jyonal’s apartment, I was trying to squeeze into some Navy body armor when Jyen broke the silence.

“Will we really be able to do it?”

“Which part?” I responded, my arm stuck in a piece of armor clearly not designed for me.

“Any of it.”

“Sure.” Then, looking at those frightened eyes, I took Jyen by the shoulders and gave her a big, passionate kiss.

She slapped me.

“Ouch,” she said, holding her hand.

“Wait, what? Why’d you hit me?” Wondering if I had misread every signal I had ever gotten from her.

“That’s for you not wanting to come with us when we had the chance,” she said, miffed.

“I didn’t even know you guys. Then the Portal was closed. Besides, this is my home. You have to admit, you guys don’t really belong on Belvaille. You’re too nice.”

“You’re nice,” Jyen countered.

I looked at her. Was she really that naïve?

“Jyen. I’m a bully. That’s my job.”

“But you don’t do it in a mean way,” she said, as if trying to convince herself.

I sighed and went back to struggling with my armor.

“Maybe you’re right,” she began, “we probably don’t fit in on Belvaille.”

Then she put her arms around me and looked deep into my eyes. Her lips were wet.

The tension was made that much more tense when Jyonal entered the room and cleared his level-ten mutant throat.

I practically pushed Jyen across the street I was so startled.

“So where do we find the Dredel Led?” he asked as if he hadn’t seen anything.

“Finding it isn’t the problem.”





CHAPTER 41


I reluctantly left my shotgun at home. It would be of no use to me.

Jyen, Jyonal, and I went outside to the cars that were waiting. We had borrowed some gang bosses’ cars and thus we looked like an army of pimps. We had ten soldiers, all armed with rockets, everyone wrapped head to toe in thick body plating. I seriously doubted the soldiers would be of use, but if nothing else they were more targets for ZR3 to deal with.

We drove to pick up Delovoa, who had finally cleaned himself up and actually wore a fine suit.

“If I’m going to die…,” he started, seeing my expression at his wardrobe.

“Is Garm going to help?” Jyen asked. For whatever reason, those two didn’t like each other. Sometimes pretty women are like thugs from different gangs: they dislike each other on principle.

“She’s showing all Belvaille’s secrets to the Navy and helping coordinate. She won’t be any use in this battle, anyway.”

Jyen seemed pleased with that as we drove off to our deaths.

“Sir, the target has been located. Twenty-three blocks from here,” one of the soldiers said to me.

Sir. Strange galaxy we live in.

“Where’s our other team?” I asked. Wallow being a team unto himself.

“En route,” he answered.

I had some small hope Delovoa could stop the robot. I had smaller hope Jyen could maybe phase it. I had a prayer that Jyonal could suddenly “see” it. I had almost no hope the soldiers could do anything. And I knew for a fact I was worthless.

But Wallow. As he approached us in that silly black armor, probably a millionth as strong as his natural skin, that gigantic truncheon in his hand, it really buoyed the spirits. We all got out of our vehicles.

“Hank,” he yelled down at me. Seriously, how had I ever pissed him off?

I looked straight up and realized I could actually fit in his nose. The soldiers were all talking at once trying to calm him, to no avail.