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Hard Luck Hank Screw the Galaxy(70)



“Is that Hank?”

Jyonal walked into the room looking good in a custom suit. The design had recently become popular; it was supposed to make guys look tougher with angles everywhere. Both of them looked like true Belvaille natives.

“Hi,” I said, rushing over to shake his hand.

“What brings you here?” he asked. “Want to go clubbing?”

“Hmm. Maybe later. But I was just thinking,” I began. Then realized I had not planned how I was going to broach this. “You want some drugs?” I asked, holding up the bag.

Jyonal looked disappointed.

“Oh.”

Jyen stepped between us and took hold of my arm with both hands. I’m going to have to remember to shove ice in my pants when I come over here.

“Jyonal has given up drugs,” she said. “Both of us are trying not to use our mutations…”

“It’s really done nothing but brought us trouble,” Jyonal finished.

“Yeah,” I agreed quietly. “What if, though,” and I tapped my lips thoughtfully. “What if there was a good reason? Like a Dredel Led nearby.”

“We’d just ask you to kill it,” Jyen laughed, bouncing on the balls of her feet like a child.

“But what if it was a really big Dredel Led that I couldn’t kill? In someone’s basement, so I wasn’t sure if I could use my gun on it and I’m not—”

“Is there a Dredel Led here, Hank?” Jyonal asked.

I took a deep breath and held up my fingers as if to say, “Let me explain.”

“Sort of.”

Both of them immediately looked frightened.

“Are you going to kill it?” Jyen asked hopefully.

“Probably not.”

“And you want me to destroy it? If you can’t, what do you think it will do to me?” Jyonal asked.

“It’s not—um, it’s not really…” How do I explain this? “It’s just standing there. It’s not violent like the others were.”

“It’s friendly?” Jyen asked with skepticism.

“No. It’s more or less dormant.”

“So it’s not alive?” Jyonal asked.

“I’m not sure robots are really alive,” I philosophically opined.

“Alive enough to kill people,” he countered.

“Look, it’s got someone trapped in his basement and we need to—”

“Trapped? If it’s dormant, how is it trapping anything?” Jyonal asked.

I scratched my face.

“It moves. It seems to be following one guy. Not attacking. Though it does tend to dislike doorways,” I laughed.

“What’s that mean?” Jyen challenged.

“Nothing. I mean it’s kind of clumsy, that’s all.”

“Then why don’t you destroy it?” Jyonal asked.

“With what?”

“With whatever you killed the other ones with,” Jyen said.

“I almost died and this one is much, much bigger.”

“You said it was dormant,” Jyonal added with a hint of sarcasm.

“It is now, but if people are hitting it in the back of the head with a sledgehammer, I’m not so sure.”

“I don’t like the idea of Jyonal having to use drugs and getting near a Dredel Led,” Jyen said firmly.

“Can’t you do it from here?” I asked.

“Do what?” Jyonal asked.

“I don’t know. Vaporize it.”

Jyonal looked at me like I was extraordinarily stupid.

“I said it’s not magic. You can’t punch it from here, can you?”

“I’m not a level-ten mutant. I don’t know how you work,” I said defensively. “You didn’t see all those people when you electrocuted them.”

“It was an accident,” Jyen blurted.

“That emanates outward. You’re right, in that case I didn’t see what I was hitting. I can try and vaporize everything on Belvaille if you want.”

“No, no, that’s okay,” I said quickly. This wasn’t going as well as I had hoped. “So do you need to see it or what?”

“Yes.”

“He’s not getting near a Dredel Led,” Jyen stated with authority. “Especially if you’re afraid of it.”

“I didn’t say I was afraid of it.”

“You won’t kill it,” she said.

“Oh, I’m afraid of standing there kicking it, sure.”

“How did it get here? Is it partners with the other two?” Jyonal asked.

“No, it’s…a long story. But we need to get rid of it before the Navy touches down.”

“What happens if I can’t kill it?”

“And what happens if it attacks him?” Jyen asked.