Hard(54)
Zach gobbled half of his burger down. He nodded.
“Why don’t I buy a school?”
“Mrphschool?” He swallowed. “A school?”
“Or…a charity. I was thinking…I don’t have to be a teacher to do what I wanted. In fact, I’d be limited if I taught, stuck with a set curriculum and working inside the administration. But, if I had like…an after-school program? Or a school with summer events? Tutoring and games and all that?”
Zach put the burger down. He smiled. His dimples were every bit the affirmation I needed.
“I think it’s a good idea.”
“Really?”
“Sure. With our money? Hell, a chicken in every pot and a tutor for every kid.”
My heart lumped but forgot to bump. “Our money?”
“Yeah. It’s a good cause. Toss my share in there too. I’ll pull a salary again once I re-enlist.”
“You’d…do that for me?”
“Shay, I told you before. I’m not in this for the money. I wanted a place to crash and a gym to train in so I could pass my physical.” He sipped his Coke. “And I wanted a chance to get closer to you.”
I looked down. The milkshake refroze in my stomach. This wasn’t a conversation to have over a burger and fries in a tiny diner.
“How close did you want to get?” I asked.
He waved a pickle at me after watching how I inhaled mine. He let me take a bite of his.
“Are you asking if I got my quick fuck and will be on my way?” He said.
In every sense of the word. “Of course not.”
“I’ll have you know, I’m not anywhere close enough to you yet.”
There wasn’t really any place left on me to get close to. All my places were thoroughly discovered. Sometimes twice. Sometimes three times while accompanied with fierce denial in the morning. What else did he want?
And then I knew.
“Look, Zach—”
“Don’t give me the step-brother line again. It doesn’t weird me out. It shouldn’t make a difference to you.”
“Okay, bro,” I sighed. “Let’s ignore the family tree for a second. You said it yourself. You’re re-enlisting.”
“So?”
“Will a Navy SEAL make it home for dinner at night?”
He quieted. “No. But there’s leave every once in a while.”
“I’m not looking for every once in a while. You have your life, what you’ve planned to do, what you’re built for.” I regretted the words as they only encouraged him to flex. “You want to be a SEAL. I understand that. But I can’t get wrapped up in this only to have you leave. Zach…I don’t want to be alone anymore.”
“You wouldn’t be.”
“We have our own goals, okay? We need to focus on those. We had some fun together. More than we should have. But I can’t let myself fall—”
Shit. I almost said it. And no big industrial truck rumbling by or hooting laugh of another diner muffled the mistake. Zach stared at me.
“Shay?” He clenched his fist around his drink. “Only two things could keep me out of the SEALs now. One would be a douche-bag doctor failing my physical. The other—”
My heart pounded. “—Don’t.”
“I never had a reason to settle down.”
“Zach.”
“You’ve always been alone.”
“Stop.”
“I literally had my life flash before my eyes, and I had nothing to show for it except a dozen classified missions and an empty apartment. Almost dying gives a man perspective. Maybe there’s more for me.”
“I can’t do this.”
“Shay, why fight it?”
“Because…” My lip trembled. I didn’t want to fight it anymore. I didn’t want to do anything but rest in his arms, giggle at his crude humor, and lick every last drop of the milkshake from his chest. “I…”
A shadow crossed over the table. A middle-aged moment-killer winked at Zach and set the check by his hand.
“Thanks, folks, come back now.” She didn’t mean it.
I stood, shouldering the bag. “We should go. Thanks for lunch.”
Zach crinkled the bill as he stood. He wagged a finger at me, but his smile returned, bigger than ever.
“We’re not done yet,” he said. “You and I got a lot to discuss.”
“We really don’t.”
“Yes, we do.” He loomed over me, brushing my chin with the bump of his fingers. I swallowed, trapped in the size, the scent, and the power of him. “From this moment on, baby, you are mine. And I’m going to spoil you, pamper you, and fuck the hell out of you until you finally admit it. That I promise.”