Good Girl Gone Plaid(75)

A smile flirted around her mouth. “Aye.”

He laughed at her attempt at a Scottish accent, even as his heart swelled with love.

“There’s no one else for me, Ian. There never has been.”

“And Neil? Will he still be a part of Emily’s life?” Maybe he shouldn’t have asked, especially at this moment, but it was something they would need to discuss.

“No.” Her tone dropped and her words chilled. “I made sure in the divorce documents that he has no rights to her. To me.”

Good.

There was so much he still didn’t know. Should probably know if they were to go forward from here.

“Will you tell me about him? Why you married him?”

“Yes.” Pain flickered across her face. “Because my dad set us up and encouraged us to get together. He was everything my dad wanted for me. A strong military man who would take care of Emily and I. Give us security.” She sighed. “I was still so young. So easily influenced. But Neil…was a terrible mistake.”

All the little hints she or Emily had dropped in conversations floated back to him. He wanted to know everything. As painful as it might be to hear it.

“Why? What happened?”

She hesitated. “Neil and I spent our honeymoon in a hotel in Tokyo. My dad paid for it. It was the first time we…”

She couldn’t finish the words, but Ian heard what she couldn’t say. He hated the image of another man touching her. Trying to seduce her. But it was a part of their history. They’d been apart for eleven years, so it was only natural that both of them would’ve had other lovers. Even if none had ever claimed his heart the way Sarah had.

“And?” he prodded when she didn’t go on.

“And it was awful.” Her smile was sad, almost bitter. “I knew I didn’t love him, and it started to sink in that night that I’d made a mistake. I could only think of you. Any time he tried to touch me, I’d cry.” She closed her eyes. “It made him pretty angry. He knew I was thinking about you. Knew I was still in love with Emily’s dad.”

“And what did he say?”

“He didn’t say much. At least not verbally. He let his fists do the talking.”

“What the fuck did you just say?” Someone was going to die. Just as soon as he figured out where this son of a bitch was.

Rage spiked inside him and red clouded his vision. Her husband had hit her.

“At the time I thought maybe it was a fluke and he’d just lost his temper with me that night. We didn’t try again for months, and I’m pretty sure he found someone else to sleep with. Which I actually was grateful for.” She hesitated. “Though now and then he’d want to try again. It was always awful, and so he’d leave me alone for a while. I started saving my money to leave him. My dad had passed away by then and my mom could barely pay the bills. I felt stuck.”

Fuck. Dammit, the guilt was squeezing his chest like a wrench.

“But after he came back from his last deployment a year ago he hit me again. And he did it in front of Emily. I moved out that night. It was my breaking point.”

“Did he ever hit Emily?”

“No. I would’ve killed him.”

His chest couldn’t seem to untighten from the mass of knots it’d become. “But he hit you.”

“Not often, but yes. I’m not proud that I stayed as long as I did—”

“Fucking hell. I should’ve been there—”

“Don’t even make this your fault. Don’t shoulder this blame. You didn’t know. You couldn’t have known. I should’ve never married him in the first place.”

“I suppose there’s a lot of things we should’ve done, or shouldn’t have done.” He sighed and shook his head. “We made some wrong turns in life, and I can only think that this all would’ve been avoided if I hadn’t made that huge fucking mistake with Hailey.”

“Listen to me, Ian. I forgive you for it.” She met his gaze squarely. There was only a hint of sadness there, but the dominant emotion was sincerity. “I think I did years ago, honestly. We were both so damn young and neither of us made the best choices. I’m not without guilt. I said horrible things to you that were only driven from a broken heart. I didn’t mean them.”

She forgave him for that night. Amazing. How was he blessed with such an amazing woman?

“Sarah.” He kissed her gently. “I should’ve tried harder to keep you and known your words were empty. I should’ve tried to find you in Japan.”

“As much as you broke my heart that day, I broke yours as well.”