It felt good to work. Even if it was on her grandma’s computer that was almost a decade old and ran at turtle speed. She needed the distraction for a few hours. Oh dear God, she really did need the distraction.
This afternoon she’d lost her mind. There was no denying it. Because even though she’d been in the powerful haze of passion, she’d known exactly what she was doing.
She’d gotten all hot and heavy with Ian. With the man who had shattered her heart so badly she didn’t think it would ever be capable of love again.
She’d tried to be open to the possibility of falling in love again in Japan. Had hoped it would happen when she married Neil, but it had barely taken any time at all before she’d come to face the ugly reality. He wasn’t Ian, he would never be Ian, and her heart still belonged to a man an ocean away.
Unfortunately Neil had realized that pretty early on too. And it hadn’t settled well.
Closing her eyes against the wave of anxiety and sadness, she swallowed the lump in her throat.
She was in a better place now. Absolutely. It didn’t matter that she was struggling financially and going it alone. There was still one person who she loved beyond measure. Her daughter. Emily was her world. Her heart.
And she was stupid, ridiculously stupid—and apparently ridiculously horny—to have tried to throw it all away. To have risked everything for an orgasm from Ian.
But, oh, what an orgasm it had been.
“No,” she muttered, standing up. “It was a really bad lapse in judgment. And it won’t happen again.”
It couldn’t happen again. Her conviction had only grown when she’d stepped back into the office to grab her purse. Whoever Ian had been talking to gave off the vibe that he’d just crawled out from under a rock.
Unease had spread through her the minute she’d seen him, and the thorough look over he’d given her had made her skin crawl.
She’d immediately sensed he wasn’t a kind person, or someone she’d want in her life in the slightest. And yet he seemed to be friends with Ian. Doing business with him.
Which was why she was going to keep her distance from Ian. No more kisses as bargains—what the hell had that been about anyway? Ian hated her, probably almost as much as she hated him.
How close hate and love were woven, though.
Needing to jump back into her distraction, she opened another project on her computer.
Actually, it was getting late, and a glass of wine sounded kind of awesome. She stood and went to the kitchen to open the bottle she’d just bought at the grocery.
The walk to the small store hadn’t taken too long, an hour tops there and back. The last thing she’d wanted to do was ask Ian to take her in his car, so since it was a beautiful day she’d thrown on her walking shoes and headed out.
After removing the cork from the budget bottle of wine, she grabbed a glass from the cupboard. Her gaze caught on a movement outside the window and she made a strangled sound of disbelief.
And here he was again. Ian McLaughlin, strolling up Gran’s drive like it was completely natural and expected.
Chapter Seven
She reached the front door before Ian could knock and swung it open.
“Have you decided to become my shadow? Why don’t you just run on home?” She arched a brow. “I’m assuming you have one?”
Ian gave a small smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I’m renting a house down in the Greenbank area. Can I come in?”
She absorbed that little tidbit of knowledge, and sighed. “Like I just said, it’s probably a bad idea.”
“But you’re going to let me in anyway?” He continued onto the porch and then stepped right over the threshold.
Once again, her space shrank to just the two of them. Her head went light with the scent of him, and when his body brushed hers as he entered, her breath caught.
“You don’t take the word no very seriously, do you?” she muttered, and shut the door behind him.
“Actually, I do.” His jaw hardened, his eyes clouded. “It carries a lot of weight with me.”
He was serious, she realized. There was more than just words there.
“Are you having a bit of wine?” He nodded to the open bottle. “Would you mind if I have a glass?”
“I’d rather you didn’t. I’m not even sure why you’ve come by. I’m hoping you won’t be here long.”
“Fair enough.” He thrust his hands into his pocket. “I won’t be here longer than necessary. I promise.”
She hesitated a moment before going to grab another glass and pouring him a little bit as well.
“Thank you.” He took the glass and lifted his gaze to hers. “We should talk about your car.”