She’s going to go through life wanting for nothing. Taking advantage of everything. Even if she fails, it doesn’t matter. They’ll still hand her a degree with smiles on their faces. All because of her last name and how deep our pockets go. And she’s happy with that. She’s completely content with her ultimate life goals amounting to nothing more than having an hourglass figure, long blonde hair and long legs that she’s more than happy to spread.
Everything about her pisses me off. I fucking love my sister, but the person she’s become her freshman year of college is horrific. She needs to get the fuck over this phase. My anger boils at the surface.
I open my mouth to lay into her again. But I can’t. Her body jolts, and the wicked grin on her face vanishes. Then she’s shot again. This time the bullet hits her chin. I see her head whip to the side. There's blood everywhere. I still don’t register what’s happened. I don’t believe it. Not until I feel their hands on me. Even then I can’t take my eyes away from her. Her face is flat on the table. Blood is slowly soaking into her hair.
No! It’s not real!
But it is.
Thick, heavy arms wrap around me. I don’t struggle. It’s not real.
“What about this one, boss?” Felipe asks, with his sick, hot breath trailing down my neck. I struggle and try to scream out as I realize what’s happening. I scream, but they don’t hear me. I kick, but they don’t flinch. I fight, but it’s useless.
A hand wraps around my throat and squeezes. I can’t breathe. I try to reach my throat, but I can’t. My face turns hot as I struggle. I need to breathe.
“No, don’t,” I hear him say. The hand around my throat loosens, and my body sags forward in Felipe's arms as I heave in a gasping breath. “Let’s get some use out of her.”
“Ava!” Hands hold down my shoulders, and I struggle to move against them.
“No!” I scream out. I plead with them. My body tries to push them away.
But they’ll only hurt you more when you do that, I hear the small voice say.
“Ava, wake up!”
I should listen to that voice. I don’t want to be hurt. They’re nicer when I listen. I go limp, letting him pin me down.
If you behave, he’ll make it good for you. I gasp for breath and try to forget. It’s wrong to feel this way. I need to listen, though. I need to live.
Why? Why do I need to live?
“Ava, please!” My shoulders shake and it makes my head slam against the pillow. Fingers dig into my skin.
Why do I want to live? What was the reason?
“Ava, wake up!” I hear Kane cry out so loud it hurts my head. I wince and slowly open my eyes. I feel dazed and my head hurts.
What have I done? He’s upset with me. Kane’s dark eyes stare down at me. His large shoulders cage me in. He’s shirtless, and his breathing is heavy. I stay still and try to think. I don’t know what happened.
“Are you alright?” He speaks softer than I expect. His eyes soften as his hand gently cups my face. I close my eyes, loving his touch, his affection. I just want him to hold me. I need him.
I lean forward and press my lips to his. Please. Please touch me. His lips are hard at first, since I caught him by surprise, but they quickly mold to mine. He leans into my kiss and I slowly lay my head back down. I reach my arms around his muscular body and pull him toward me. My blunt fingernails dig into his shoulders. I part my legs as his body comes closer to me. I need him.
He pulls away, breaking our kiss and leaving me wanting more. I don’t know why I need his comforting touch. But I do. I need this pain to go away, this hurt in my chest. And Kane can do that for me. I need him.
“Please,” I whisper. My chest heaves as his lustful eyes look down at me. He tries to back away, and tears threaten to burn my eyes. He doesn’t want me. Why would he? I’m tainted. I’ve never been touched by a man before, other than raped. They took my innocence. Tears prick at the back of my eyes, and I have to close my eyes to stop them from falling. They took everything from me. But I could give my body to him. I want to. I want to feel what it’s supposed to be like.
I risk his anger and plead again, “Please.” I don’t know how I’ll be able to live if he denies me. I can’t stand this pain. It feels like my chest is caving in on me. My throat closes, and I swallow the lump in my throat as he sits up and shakes his head.
“I won’t take advantage of you.” His denial chills my body. My arms cross and I turn to the side. I struggle to breathe.
What’s wrong with me?
I’m ruined.
“Please, please,” I whisper into the pillows. My eyes burn, but the tears don’t come. I need to feel something other than this. I’m ashamed and humiliated to beg like this and be denied. But I should’ve expected it. If he wanted me that way, he would’ve had me already.