“Finish up. It’s getting late,” I tell her, once she seems to have settled some.
My eyes travel down her body, not at all in a sexual way. She’s beautiful, but she’s not well. She’s thin and the light shines off of several small scars on her body. One is noticeably larger though, and looks like a bite mark on her shoulder. There are more small scratches on her hips and shoulders, and some look like they were left by fingernails--from digging in and piercing her skin while holding her down.
I have to close my eyes and look back to the floor. I can’t imagine everything she’s gone through. I can’t imagine what she expects from me. But I’ll do everything I can to make this easy for her. I want to protect her from that shit and take away the pain she’s in. I don’t know if I can, but I’ll at least try.
There’s no doubt in my mind. If I could save her, I would.
Ava
I look at the cuff on my hand and then back to Kane. He locked one cuff around my wrist, and the other around the bedpost before going into the bathroom to shower. He takes another step into the bedroom, drying off his hair with a towel. Boxers hang low on his hips and my eyes stare at the deep “V” carved from his rock hard abs that taunts me. His muscles are still faintly covered with droplets of water and my fingers itch to feel his body. To run my hands along the smooth lines. If there’s no other truth in this world, Kane is the epitome of man candy. My cheeks flare with a blush and I have to look back down at the bed, then to the cuff.
I’m not sure why I have these feelings toward him. I shouldn’t. I haven’t had them before with the others. But the thought of being his--the idea that he can protect me? It has my body aching for his touch. The need to please him is stronger than I’ve ever felt before.
But he can’t save me.
My eyes close as I hear him walk to the dresser.
No one can save me.
But for now, I’m his. And the thought sends a warmth through my body. First from a sense of security, but then I feel something else entirely deeper in my body. Lower. Heating my core. I feel so ashamed. I must really be broken, to feel this desire for someone I should loathe. I should fear him. I do, in a way. But not like the others. There were three. First him. And then Felipe finished my “training,” as they called it. And then there were three.
And now Kane.
But Kane isn’t like them. He’s not like any of them. I believe everything he said earlier. Maybe I shouldn’t. Perhaps it’s all lies. But something inside of me craves him in a way I’ve never felt before. Something is telling me to trust him. A soft voice buried deep in my chest whispers that he will save me. I need only be his.
There’s no doubt in my mind that I’m a fool to believe it. But the very thought that it could be true makes me want to give him all of me.
My eyes widen, and fear quickly drowns out all the other feelings. That’s not what I’m supposed to be thinking. That’s not what my focus should be.
Revenge is my purpose. I can’t forget. I won’t let the past lay in silence. I will make them all pay. And this man, whoever the fuck he is, he’s only a temporary stay. I can’t lose sight of where I’m going.
My eyes snap up at him as he walks closer. He has a stern look on his face that’s been there ever since our conversation ended. I never should have asked questions. He said he wants me to, but I shouldn’t have. It didn’t do me any favors. Instead my focus is distant and my mind is fogged with thoughts I shouldn’t be having.
I asked him if he was going to save me. A shudder runs through my body as I close my eyes and try to keep myself composed. As if this man could be my savior. Shame and disgust run through me.
No one is going to help me. I thought I’d come to terms with that, back when I decided I’d fight to live solely for the chance to kill them. Him first. He needs to die. So long as I watch the life leave him, I’ll die with contentment in my heart.
My body stiffens as Kane walks over to me. I’m clothed at least. I don’t think he’s going to want to fuck me. He doesn’t look at me like the others do. He hasn’t taken from me. But I’m still on high alert. I don’t know if I believe him. I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t trust anyone that works for him.
I hate that I did for a moment. It was a mistake. I won’t do it again.
He stands over me as I sit on my heels on the bed.
He leans over and unlocks the cuff with a tiny key, and then places both of them on the nightstand. It’s so quiet. The only sound is the clinking and loud clunk of the metal handcuffs. I swallow thickly and look up at him. Waiting for his orders. Waiting for him to use me. I have to work hard to keep my eyes open and stay still.