Girl in Love(87)

And she was going to let him know how she felt. But since she sucked at talking these kinds of things out, she was going to take a page from his book and sing the song she’d never thought she would. She’d literally titled it The Song I’ll Never Sing.

But she was going to sing it tonight.

Her friend eyed her with blatant disbelief plain on her face.

Trace Corbin was like a huge plate of comfort food. It felt good while inhaling it, but afterwards, she was miserable and consumed with regret.

She felt ready to let him know once and for all that whatever they’d had, whether it was real love or just some highly intense lust-fueled attraction, was over.

He didn’t have to keep giving her that apologetic look he was always aiming in her direction. Or keep trying to make amends. Or step out of the room when Gretchen called. Or worry about her throwing her stupid drunk self at him.

She was going to sing her piece and move the hell on. Finally.



THE CROWD in Greensboro had an energy that brought Kylie back to life. She apologized to them for yesterday and made a joke about the sexy singer she was touring with getting her so hot and bothered that she passed out.

She was proud of herself. Her heart was safe once again.

Her pride was a little wounded though. It cuddled her bruised ego in a darkened corner while she smiled and shook her ass all over the stage.

After what was normally her final song before her duet with Trace, Kylie addressed the audience.

“Any of y’all ever have that person, that one person who deep down you knew you shouldn’t love? Knew would only break your heart?”

The majority of the audience cheered in response.

“And no matter what you do or where you go, after that person breaks your heart, it seems like everything everywhere you turn is a reminder of them?”

She was greeted with understanding once more. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Trace watching her from the side of the stage.

“This one’s for you,” she said softly into her microphone.

The band played the slow opening and Kylie began to sing.

There’s a road I never take. It’s right past the interstate. It’d be easier to get where I’m goin’ if I went that way.

She swallowed hard, startled by the thick knot of emotion threatening to interrupt her.

But I just drive on past. Go ahead and waste the gas. ’Cause I know right where that road will lead. Straight back to the memory of you and me.

For reasons she didn’t want to admit to herself, she couldn’t even glance to the side of the stage he was on. So she stared straight ahead while she sang.

No I don’t turn the radio on, ’cause damn if they don’t keep playin’ our song. There’s a shirt in my closet, way back in the back. But I don’t even think about that.

No I don’t go down that road, don’t even turn the radio on, and I don’t walk around wearin’ your old shirt. ’Cause I know right where all of that will lead. Straight back to the memory of you and me.

Her eyes began to pinch and sting and she prayed the audience couldn’t tell that every single lyric was struggling to make its way out over the lump in her throat.

This was therapeutic in a way. It was their final goodbye. She knew it as sure as she knew her own name.

I tell myself one day I’ll be strong enough to handle these things, but right now it’s the song I’ll never sing. You don’t have to worry about hearing these words from me. ‘Cause you’ll always be the song I’ll never sing.

The audience erupted into applause when she was finished. He came out onto the stage and her arm brushed his. Trace’s entire body twitched as if she’d electrocuted him.

But she felt pure relief.

She wouldn’t have to work so hard to guard her heart anymore. She’d left it out on the stage.

This time she didn’t have to avoid him as they sang The Other Side of Me together to close the show. He didn’t even glance in her direction.

When they finished and he left her on stage alone, as if he couldn’t get away from her fast enough, her feelings weren’t hurt. Because there was only one emotion she could feel, the safest one she knew.

Blissful numbness.





THE BUS was so dark she couldn’t see a thing when she slipped onto it. It was late and she didn’t want to wake anyone so she didn’t turn on any lights and practically tiptoed.

“So that’s it then? Planning to avoid me for the rest of the tour?”

Kylie nearly had a seizure at the unexpected sound. She felt the wall and pressed the button for the lights nearest to her. Trace sat completely still at the small table in the kitchenette.

She’d figured he’d be in bed asleep by now. Or at least, she’d hoped he would be.