Girl in Love(107)

“Don’t go like this,” he whispered. “Don’t leave mad. Please don’t.”

“Okay. I’m okay,” she said, using both hands to push him out of her space. “I’m not mad.” She took a deep breath and used every ounce of strength to pull those old familiar walls back down over her heart. Indifference took the place of the hurt inside of her. Hurt was warm and soft—messy and yielding. Indifference was cold and hard—solid and tangible. Something she could hold on to.

Trace stood upright and opened his mouth to answer, but his gaze widened when she pulled back, as if he could literally see the transformation that was taking place before his very eyes.

“It’s just seeing you…and her…” she began, her voice coming out as shaky as her legs felt. “Seeing her reminded me of how we’ve been living in a bubble. The outside world doesn’t disappear just because we do. Your family needs you and I need to get back to the tour, so we should probably take a step back anyways.” She forced herself to swallow and look away from the torment filling his eyes. “Everything’s been so crazy lately that we haven’t really had time to think about what’s best for everyone.”

“Kylie, I have no fucking clue what you’re talking about. I don’t really give a damn what’s best for everyone. You’re what’s best for me. And I’m trying my hardest to be what’s best for you. But if you’re having second thoughts—”

“Second thoughts is hardly the right term.” She tried to smile at him but her mouth wasn’t cooperating and it resulted in more of a smirk. “More like we’ve been rushing into things without bothering to have any first thoughts about them.”

“Don’t do this. Don’t bail on me now, sweetheart. I hear the words coming out of your mouth, but you forget I know what’s really going on in that head of yours.” Trace pulled her close once more, and she held her breath so as not to breathe him in.

Her own words echoed around them.

Don’t do this. You don’t mean it. I don’t believe you. She’d once begged him not to leave her. And he’d had to go too. She finally got it. Sometimes it was better to walk away. Painful as it might be, sometimes that was the only option.

“Well unless you’re going to explain what the hell she’s doing here, I guess we’re out of luck. I need to go, Trace. One of us has to be the grown up and finish this tour.”

He stepped back as if she’d shoved him. She flinched as well, knowing that had been a cheap shot.

“I didn’t mean that.” She wanted to hit something. “It’s just her…and you. And—”

“She’s a friend, Kylie. A good friend. One that I trust and have been through a lot with. That’s it. For the most part. But it’s not like you think. Not like what you and I—”

Kylie put a hand up between them. “Then tell me, this friend you trust, what does she think of us being together? And what are you going to do the next time you slip up and drink? Who are you going to turn to for advice? Let me guess, the good friend you trust and have been through a lot with. Who also happens to despise me.”

She couldn’t know for sure, but she’d be willing to bet Gretchen was a firm supporter of his decision to walk away from her last year. And she’d be damned if she was getting a repeat of that performance.

“You already planning my next rehab stay, Kylie Lou? Nice. That’s hard to hear from the girl who just gave my mom a big speech about her faith in me.”

His words broke something inside her. She was upset and didn’t want to keep saying hurtful things. The last thing she wanted was to hurt him when everything was already so screwed up. She needed space. Needed room to think clearly without him disorienting her all over again.

“I just…need some space, okay? Can you give me that? Please?”

His shoulders dropped as he stared at her with an unreadable expression. He nodded slowly. “Yeah. I can give you that. If that’s really what you want.”

She leaned up and kissed him softly on the cheek, stilling for a moment so she could feel the rough stubble against her lips, could breathe him in one last time. Slowly, and without another word, she walked to her truck, climbed calmly inside, and pulled away.

But because she’d never really be able to move on from the natural disaster that was Trace Corbin without looking back, she glanced in her rearview.

He stood there with both hands on top of his head, growing smaller. Looking lost and alone.

Just like she felt.





OKLAHOMA WAS a lot prettier when you’d been gone awhile.