Girl in Love(10)

Do I want to stop? Her head said yes. That this wasn’t the man she wanted this with. But her body said no. That she needed this. Needed to let someone in so she could push someone else out. Someone who’d already left long ago. Her heart was staying out of it. Or maybe she’d burned it to ash already.

“Um.”

Steven’s strong hands began to drop lower. His right hand snaked up under the hem of her skirt.

“I mean it, Ryans. I warned you. And yet, you followed me to the bar. You gave me come-fuck-me eyes while we did shots. True or false?”

He lowered his head and licked her neck. She shivered when his hand rose higher on her thigh.

“True,” she whispered.

His teeth raked the sensitive flesh on her throat, and she whimpered involuntarily.

“See, noises like that will get you fucked. Is that what you want? I need to know for sure.”

She couldn’t think straight. Every answer that rose to her lips seemed like the wrong one. Yes. No. Maybe. I don’t know.

When a thick finger slid under her panties and grazed her gently, she cried out. Pleasure, pain, and deep, messy hurt stirred within her.

“I need…oh God.”

Steven sucked the skin just above her collarbone as he pressed a finger inside of her. “Fucking hell, you’re wet,” he moaned into her ear. “Dammit. I have to stop, Ryans. I have to.” He withdrew his finger and leaned into her, dropping his head onto her shoulder.

Her knees threatened to give out. “No. No. Don’t stop.” She clutched his shirt in her hands. Her eyes were starting to adjust to the lack of light. The outline of his frame was broad and muscular. His mussed hair sticking up in every direction from where she’d been tearing her hands through it was a major turn-on. “I need…I need…”

Why can’t I just ask for what I need?

“You need to come. I can feel that. How tight and tense you are. Christ, I nearly pulled you into an alley tonight.”

“Maybe you should have. You’re right. I need it. Make me come, Steven. Please.”

He groaned loudly from above her. Thick arms braced against the wall on either side of her head. He leaned down and let his forehead press against hers.

“We’re messing up, Ryans. We’re friends. We’re damn good at writing music together. The occasional messing around is one thing. This is point of no return shit we’re dealing with here. This will complicate things. It will make things weird.”

“I don’t… I don’t know if I care right now, Blythe.” She felt like a trembling mass of raw nerves. All riled up with no relief in sight.

“Trace will kill me if he ever finds out.”

Something in her snapped at the sound of his name. She shoved hard against his chest in the darkness but he barely flinched.

“Don’t. Don’t fucking use him as an excuse. He threw me away. He walked away. Hell, he practically ran. He’s with someone else. If you don’t want to do this, then go. But don’t you dare make this about him. I’m moving on, dammit.” Scorching tears began to roll down her face.

Something else wet touched her cheek. Steven’s mouth. He was literally kissing her tears away. Well that was something no one had ever done before. And it was also extremely hot.

“Shh. Okay. Okay, Ryans. I’m sorry.” He licked her last remaining tear. “Tell me what you want. I’ll do whatever you want. You want to mess around and then pretend it never happened? Okay. I can try. Want to have meaningless sex until the sun comes up? I can do that too. There are so many ways I can get you off, it’d take all night to list them. But I need to make a few things clear first.”

She nodded. Her blood was on fire from his words. She was burning up. Desire spread like lava through her so quickly she was losing the ability to concentrate on anything else.

Steven gripped her wrists tightly and pinned them above her head. She squirmed, rubbing her thighs together to relieve the pressure.

“There’s a difference between wanting to have sex with someone and needing to come. I can make you come. We can go to sleep after and blame it all on the drinking. If I make you come and you still want to have sex with me, well, let’s just say I won’t turn you down. But if you so much as think of another man while I’m inside you, I will know. And let’s get something straight right the hell now. You want a mess-around buddy to get you off every now and then? I’m cool with that. But I am no one’s fucking rebound guy. Got it?”

“Y-yes.” She twitched from the overwhelming effort of trying to stifle her need. “Now I need to know something.”