I inhale deeply and look at the closed door the nurse leaves me at.
I walk in with a smile on my face. Tommy looks clean and well taken care of, but he looks utterly exhausted. He also looks pissed when he sees me, which takes me aback.
"Luce, I can't believe you let that asshole throw me in this place," Tommy says, gritting his teeth and looking up at me with narrowed eyes. "And if you're fucking him, I don't want to believe that either. But I can't believe I'm finally sober," Tommy says and I hear his voice crack. "I feel like I haven't seen myself or my own life in years, Luce, thank you so much. But there's something that I have to tell you," Tommy says, reaching out for my hand.
I sit down in the chair next to his bed and hold his hand. It feels warm and clean and makes me breathe so much easier.
"Lucy, Giancarlo Sandoval's crazy wife and this other dude I owed money to, this biker Luke Gravos, they wanted me to kill their husbands. They were promising to erase my debts and make me a wealthy man," Tommy says this, and I see him searching my eyes for something.
My reaction? To see if I knew this already?
I can't breathe for a second and I'm so confused.
The note … it wasn't about how he owed Gian more than anyone else. It was because that's who these women wanted him to cross off first. The idea of Gian being hurt terrifies me. The idea that someone who should care about him - whoever this wife of his is - orchestrating the hurt kills me. And Tommy, a killer? That's almost too much for me to handle and I can't say anything right now. I should. My lips part and nothing comes out.
"I just wanted to give us a better life, Luce. I didn't want to do it. I couldn't exactly say no to them. But … Gian told me that it has been taken care of. He told me yesterday, on the phone, he told me everything." Tommy squeezes my hand again. "Lucy, do you trust Giancarlo Sandoval? Can we trust this guy?"
I don't know much about these deals, but I know that I can trust Gian. No matter my doubts or the dumb fights we've had, no matter how strange our courtship was if you would even call it that, I know I can trust Gian. I feel it deeper in my bones than I've ever felt anything before in my life. "Yes, I trust Gian. I love him," I say, finally looking at Tommy.
Tears are welling in my eyes and when Tommy pulls me into his arms, I'm so grateful. I can't believe that only a few weeks ago, Tommy was strung out, I was barely able to pay for my box of an apartment, and I had no friends in the world.
Gian told me that he was going to keep me forever.
I know he wanted to tell me about his wife - I know that he was going to tell me something before, after I was dancing with Margo, and I didn't let him. It must've been easy to hold me and not say anything, because now the sadness I saw in his eyes makes so much sense.
"Tommy, I'm so glad you're doing better. I'm going to visit you every day. I know you'll be out of here soon and you can do anything you want. You're free," I tell him, kissing him on the cheek.
Tommy releases me and squeezes my hand before letting me go. "I still feel like I want to sleep for a thousand years … even though it's been like I was sleepwalking through life. But do me a favor. Don't visit me. Enjoy having your own life, and then when I'm out of here, we can spend actual time together. I … I need time to decompress everything from the last seven years, to be honest. I haven't been dealing with it like you have at all."
I purse my lips together. I want to argue with that, but I also want to give him what he's asking for. Tommy deserves this. He's asking me to leave him alone, but it isn't like all the other times.
"You know how to call if you need me. If you need anything," I say, standing up. I'll give him his space. "I love you, brother," I tell Tommy. Walking out of that room is difficult, but an enormous weight on my shoulders is lifted, too. For the first time in my life, I know that my brother is going to be okay.
I know that I'm going to be okay.
I walk back out and see a downtrodden look on Gian's face. He knows that I know the truth. He expects me to be angry.
"The next time I dance, I'd like to not have a terrible ending," I break the silence.
It's a question in a way. If Gian doesn't say something about how he's not going to have that, well then I know that Gian has done so much good for me, but I need to be free of him. But what really makes me feel free is being with him.
"You can have absolutely anything you want," Gian says, and I hear the emotion thick in his voice. "I thought my wife, Terry, I thought she loved me a long time ago. I didn't think I'd ever find someone else," he says.
I wrap my arm around Gian's neck and kiss him. "But you did?" I ask in a whisper quiet voice.
"I have," Gian says, kissing my nose.
"Thank you for everything," I say. I don't want to rehash everything right now. I just want to go home. And home? Home is wherever Gian is.
14
Lucy
After more than a rocky start and some twists I couldn't have imagined, the day I never dared dream of is here.
I'd offered my body to Giancarlo Sandoval. I thought it would be for one night, but it was for the rest of my life.
We were both in too deep and when he said I could leave, all I wanted was to stay.
His ex-wife Terry decided to get my brother to kill him.
And now, a finalized divorce, a crazy ex-wife being considerably less crazy with someone else, and nothing to keep us from being happy, Gian and I are getting married.
"I could have taken you anywhere in the world, you know," Gian whispered to me.
Call me tacky but I wanted to get married in Wicked Paradise. Getting married in a casino is not normally the classiest act, sure, but I found it romantic to get married in the place where we met. The place where we first kissed. The place where we both learned to open up our hearts and love again.
"I have everything I've ever wanted, right now," I say, and my eyes are already watering.
"You may now kiss the bride," the priest tells us, and Gian grabs me tight and kisses me so hard, so passionately, so rough and tender at once, I forget that we're anywhere else or with anyone … I moaned.
What can I say, that's how good Gian kisses me! The whole world evaporates, and my body responds.
My face heats up and I know I must be bright red from embarrassment, but I also can't manage to care because I have everything.
When my heartbeat returns to normal, I look over at Tommy. He gave me away today, and I married Gian. The huge rock on my finger is weighing it down, but for the first time in my life I am actually free. Tommy gave me away, but he is more of a part of my life than ever.
I have not one but two incredible men in my life right now and I'm so grateful I could burst. I reach out and squeeze Tommy's hand.
"You're so beautiful, Luce. Congratulations," Tommy says. His eyes are watering, and that makes my eyes water.
Then I look over at Gian, and I can't help it. I totally lose it. I'm a mess of happy tears and sounds of happiness, and I jump into his arms. Those strong arms that hold me so tight, spin me, and lift me up while he carts me off to the dance floor.
"I know this is like so not kosher," I say and bite my lower lip. "But you said Terry, your ex-wife, you said she was trying to have Tommy kill you. Did your employee, Zander, know? And are they really just off somewhere with a big pile of money?" I told myself that I wasn't going to ask these things. Not because Gian didn't want to tell me because I felt pretty sure he would. But still, I couldn't help but ask.
Gian's eyes widen. "Oh, so you wanna do this here?" He says, but he's laughing. I can't believe how light the air is between us with such a heavy topic. "Zander didn't know. The reason he was so torn up is because he's always been so loyal. So wanting to be with Terry? He didn't know what he was getting into then," Gian laughs, running a hand down my back as he spins me around the dance floor more.
I feel like a princess right now.
Even if I'm talking about my husband's ex-wife. I mean, we can't all be virgins, can we?
"Zander is still going to work for me, after they get back from a long vacation. Loyal people are extremely hard to find. Terry's parents are the ones that pushed her to marry me. I didn't believe in love then, but I tried to love Terry. And Terry? I don't know that she cared or believed either, but Zander dealt with the majority of her crap and they came out in love on the other side. Who would have guessed?" Gian kisses my forehead. "Love is … silly like that."
I have never heard Gian use a word like silly before and it tickles me. I think I actually giggle before Gian pulls me into his arms and kisses away all my thoughts.
Happily ever after worked out surprisingly well for everyone, I guess, and I think about Tommy when I come up for air. He's dancing with Margot …
"Oh, Gian, look who is next!" I say, pointing with my eyes.