Just as Danforth and I finish with this sound bite, Jem makes his move. "Excuse me, Mr. Mills," he says to Danforth, "may I please borrow Miss Fallon?"
"Ms. Fallon," I correct.
"Ms. Fallon," he says, matching my nasty tone. "Excuse us." He gestures toward the back. I follow him toward the nurse's station where there are fewer people but still some. This upcoming performance piece would be pointless without an audience. "You have to stop this," he begins.
"Stop what? I have no idea what you're talking about."
"This war you've decided to wage against me. Spreading rumors about my love life? Petitioning the board to fire me? Bringing the FDA in? They could force me to abandon my drug trial. My work could potentially help millions of people."
"Mine too," I parry.
He's silent for a moment to swallow his anger. "Going after my work is low."
"I'll go as low as necessary, buddy. I've waded through shit before, and I'm not afraid to get dirty again. But this can all stop, Dr. Ambrose. You know my condition. You can easily do your work, in peace, back in Independence or Pacific City or even a deserted island. You can save your millions there, just not here. Not in my town. We don't want you here."
"No, you don't want me here," he says, lowering his voice.
"Well, I think the current polls and general animosity around town supports my view more than yours," I counter with a smug grin.
"Yes, I suppose you should be congratulated for spreading your hate so far and wide in such a short time. How much did it cost? A million? Two? Your soul?"
"If it gets you gone, it's worth every fucking penny," I sneer. "You claim to have the city's best interest at heart. If that were true, you would have packed your bags the second he showed up. You didn't. People died."
"You're not seeing the bigger picture, Joanna. You--"
"No, you're not. Just. Leave."
"No," he says, hard as titanium.
I fold my arms across my chest. "No?"
"I am not going anywhere. I'm close to finding him," he says, lowering his voice even further. "If I leave, I'll have to start all over. Can't you see that?"
"All I see is half the hospital without windows," I say quieter. "I see people missing limbs with burns covering half their bodies when they were brought to the hospital after the bombing. I see, and smell, Brendan's corpse as it smoldered in my driveway. I see your brother holding a gun on me then injecting me with God knows what. It's on you. That's all on you. So just leave. Or I am not responsible for what I do next."
"Meaning?" He actually seems shocked and horrified as he studies my hard face. "You wouldn't."
"As I said, I'm not responsible for what I'll have to do next." Great exit line. After raising an eyebrow, I step away. His hand clamps around my wrist, stopping me. I spin around and jerk my hand away. "Do not touch me or I'll have you arrested for battery," I say loudly.
"Stop it. Just stop this. You're acting like a lunatic."
"And now we can add slander to your list of crimes!"
"Will you listen to yourself? Do you know what will happen if you do what you're threatening to?" he asks in a low whisper. "Forget about what it will do to my life, what about Lexie? It will spill over to her."
"It already has. That one's on you too."
"You cannot do this," he whispers desperately. "It will destroy everything. All I've accomplished. Do you really hate me that much?"
"I don't hate you. I feel nothing for you," I say through gritted teeth.
He's silent for a second, then says, "That's because you have no soul," he states as a fact. "Dress it up anyway you like Joanna, but what this comes down to is the fact that I don't want you. And from what I've experienced, I'm not surprised that no one ever has. And they never will. There is something twisted, something wrong inside you. At least Jordan admits his exists. You hide yours, dress it up as doing the right thing. If Justin could see you now, he'd be as disgusted with you as I am. Or maybe he did see it, and that's why he could never return your love. He saw how pathetic you really are."
I'm brimming with such hate and hurt it has to come out. Really I just want him to shut the fuck up. With all my might, I slap his face. The room goes quiet except for my heavy breathing. Jem looks as shocked as everyone else in the room, myself included. "Fuck you, cocksucker." And for good measure, I slap him again. "Fuck you."
Still breathing heavily and shaking with unharnessed emotion, I stalk out of the room, past my staring and whispering audience, then out of the wing with what little dignity I can muster. Shannon rushes over to me, but I hold up my hand to stop her. I need to be alone for a few minutes. Away from prying eyes and ears. I all but punch the two elevator buttons. The one going up opens first. Perfect.